How Affectation Affected Him

Cromwell Argus, Volume XXVII, Issue 1373, 20 August 1895, Page 7

How Affectation Affected Him

A South Side young maniWho lives under the shadow of the Chicago®!!versify was paying his “ devours” to the daughter of ft relict of Boston’s Beacon Hill aristocracy, now sojourning with a maiden aunt in tha Garden City, He wished to impress the guard and the Boston belle that be was way up in astronomical love and induce in her a belief that he possessed a classical education and was up in all the essentials of a y mng man of culture and refinement. And ti is is the way he started out: “My stellar soul,” he said, "you are the Pleiades of my solar centre, as magnificent sathe constellar Hercules, as charming as Ursa Major, as regular in outline as Aquila, as intellectually expansive as Cygnet, as transcendentally stately as the Great Southern Cross, with the beautiful proportions ol the isosceles triangle." And then it came her turn to sling around erudition, and thus did the Boston maiden deliver herself. Said she: , "Young man, you had best square the circle, box the compass, and make a bee-line 'for the milky way. guiding your course by Andromeda, and Castor and Pollux, to the furthermost boundaries of Orion. When you were first introduced to me at Nahant, a couple of summers ago, I took you to be ■ man of ordinary common sense, and willing to acquire some elements of a commonschool education. But since then I have diagnosed your mental and physical proportions, and find that you are a semi-astrono-inical idiot, with false pretensions to an occult geometry, concerning which you know as little as the average Texan cowboy does about baseball etiquette. Good evening, sir." She left the drawing-room ; he was left—and straightway left that unsalubrious locality. / ' \