Reporter’s diary

Press, 27 June 1987, Page 2

Reporter’s diary

Pipped at... TWO YEARS ago we suffered a plague of posters plastered around Christchurch by phantoms who seemed bent on covering every flat surface within reach. A sub-committee of the Keep Christchurch Beautiful Committee was established to; cure this plague, and it came up with a poster: abatement programme. John Y, one of the phantom . poster pasters, suggested that poster bollards be erected at key points in the city, as legitimate posting pozzies. ... the poster bollard TODAY at 10 a.m., under the bridge on Colombo Street and Moorhouse Avenue, a group of Malvern Scouts will remove old posters from bridge supports. Four new bollards — unspoiled and ready to take the first wave of posters — will be erected under the bridge. Counsellors Carole Evans, David Cox and Ron Wright will also arrive armed with scrubbery weapons. John Y, one of the phantom pasterers, has promised to refrain from daubing public amenities with his material and to stick to poster bollards in future. Young Nats RUTH RICHARDSON would not be amused. The University of Canterbury Young Nationals branch issued a statement yesterday on the party’s education policy. The branch thundered, attacked, supported — and misspelt. Some groups were “frighted” at the prospect Of being required to “preform” under policies that were “consistant” with the need for choice. The, gremlins — products no doubt of the State education system — built to a climax in the last para-

graph which, with disarming charm, referred to the ; need to "retiterate” total ? support for this . National f Party’s education ' policy.' Top priority in the branch .? budget should be for a j decent dictionary. '■ Tales from ... TWO ANECDOTES that illustrate the Fijian ability to laugh in the face of fear, have surfaced. During their capture, the Bavadra Government was bedded down in a large bure with mattresses on the floor. The oply furniture was a settee, and one modest Indian gentleman asked if he could use it. He moved it into a corner, with his mattress behind it. When one of the guards came in brandishing his rifle, another member of Parliament approached him. “If you get orders to shoot us all during the night, don’t overlook the man behind the settee, there.” ... the Fijian coup THE SEIZED Bavadra Government did some gentle baiting of the soldiers. One member went up to an armed guard, and peered into his face. Two brown eyes — common enough in Fiji — were the only things showing through the slit in the balaclava. “Don’t I know you from somewhere?” The soldier immediately sprang to attention and saluted. “Yes, sir,” he said. “You taught me in class five.” ’ Hot rods A CHRISTCHURCH couple, familiar with the term that is used to describe stolen car parts, “midnight spares,” were startled to see a car wreckers in Sydney called just that: “Midnight Spares.” Presumably, they give five-finger Jiscounts. —Jenny b'eltham