Making a decision to take the middle path

Press, 16 January 1986, Page 13

Making a decision to take the middle path

When year-old Amelia had sleeping problems, particularly after a spell in hospital, Felicity Price and Chris Rennie decided to try the “Middle way” method, described by Penelope Leach in her book, “Baby and Child.” The author describes it as “a compromise which neither leaves the child desperately alone nor gives him victory in getting some more day. The message it is supposed to convey is something like this: “There is no need to cry. You aren’t deserted. We will always come if you need us. But it is the end of today and time for you to go to

sleep “You let the child cry, but let her know you are there,” Felicity explains. “We would put Amelia to bed, say goodnight and leave the room.

“As long as she cried, we would go in every five minutes and say, “Goodnight. Please go to sleep.” But we wouldn’t pick her up, or stay in the room. “The idea is to be as boring as possible,” she says. “The first night Amelia cried for ages; the second night for half an hour. It took a few days.” Penelope Leach says she has known it take a week

for this policy to work, but never known it to take longer unless the parents weakened.

“If you get so fed up one night that you decide to leave your toddler crying alone after all, you will have the whole job to do again. Equally, if you cannot stand going up and down any longer and decide to take your child downstairs with you the whole thing will start again.”

Amelia proved the point. Her parents felt sorry for her after she had been ill and gave in. Felicity admits: “We had to start all over again. But in the end, it worked.”