Right road, wrong dog

Press, 16 August 1984, Page 21

Right road, wrong dog

PAUL ELLMAN

in Managua describes the

world’s most eccentric address system.

Should the United States ever decide to intervene militarily in Nicaragua it would be well-advised to brief its troops thoroughly on how to get round the capital, Managua. Otherwise, they are likely to be defeated by what must be the world’s most eccentric address system ’ People in this capital of about 800,000 citizens do not have their .homes and businesses at number such-and-such, Blank Street. Instead, the address consists of directions on how to get there. For example: “In the Altamira Woods, one block east of the Sour Milk.” This means: “Go to a neighbourhood known as Altamira and find a sign advertising sour milk for sale, and then head one block east.” One reason for the confusion is that much of Managua was destroyed in an earthquake in 1972 and the city subsequently acquired a 80km-wide sprawl of new neighbourhoods, few of them planned and many of them consisting to this day mainly of primitive wooden shacks.

Even so, the inhabitants still behave as if the earthquake had never happened, making no concessions to those who never knew the place before it was destroyed. Thus, another genuine address is: “From where the little tree used to be before the earthquake, 100 metres towards the lake.” Lake Managua, which lies on the northern edge of the city, is one of the few available reference points and figures in many addresses. Other references are not so

helpful. One neighbourhood was once known for a fierce black dog, which lived in a corner house and used to rush out barking at passers-by. Addresses in this neighbourhood hence became: “From the black dog, so many metres to the east or west.” One day, the dog was run over by a truck but he is remembered in the directions: “From where the black dog used to be, so many metres, etc, etc.” After they overthrew the Somoza dictatorship in 1979, the Sandinistas decided to impose some order and started giving names to many thoroughfares. Unfortunately, they have yet to install signs indicating which street is which as I discovered when, armed with a map marked with the new names, I went looking for Revolution Way. Seeing two women waiting for a bus, I asked them if I was already on Revolution Way. “Oh no,” said one. “This is the street that leads to the electricity.” “No, it’s not,” said her companion. “It’s that one that goes to the

lottery.” The system regularly defeats even those who might be expected to show the most expertise at navigating it. A taxi driver, told to go to the Spanish Embassy and then 100 metres south and 50 metres east, drove here and there for about half an hour. Finally his passenger expressed irritation at the failure to reach journey’s end. “But are they long metres or short ones?” the unabashed driver asked.