Reporter’s diary

Press, 25 May 1984, Page 2

Reporter’s diary

Haute cuisine THE WOMAN behind the counter of one of Christchurch’s takeaway food bars was stunned when a grinning American tourist and his wife strode in this week, and announced that they had come halfway across the world to “try out the food at your wonderful little shop.” They went on to explain to the bemused cook, who is the first to admit that the food is fairly ordinary and a little on the fatty side, that friends who had visited New Zealand recently had told them of “this wonderful little shop” that sold all manner of delicacies, and given them written directions to find it. The tourists selected a gutbursting range of takeaways, which were soon sizzling in the deep fryer like a witch’s brew. They went away happy, no doubt eager to tell the folks back home about Christchurch’s most unlikely tourist attraction.

Healthy greasies THE LATEST in

the health food line in Christchurch is “healthy” fried fish, cooked in wholemeal batter instead of the traditional flour-and-water kind. Anyone who feels guilty about tucking into a big meal of fatty “shark and taties” can now smile and think of the good all that fibre is doing their system. However, like all good things, it costs more to have fibre in your fish. Tunnel tales

STORIES in the “Diary” recently about the Lyttelton rail tunnel, the things that lurk in it, and the people who have been through it, reminded a reader of an experience had by his father and some other Lyttelton men many years ago. Having imbibed long and well in the Valley Inn at Heathcote, and with no prospect of transport back to the port, they decided to walk back through the rail tunnel, lugging a crate of beer with them. About halfway through they stopped for rest and refreshment, then

forged resolutely on through the gloom, or so they thought. What with the rough surface underfoot, the late hour, and the effects of their earlier wassailing, even the hardy Lyttelton men were glad to see the end of the tunnel — until they realised that they were back at Heathcote. Sauce SOME SAUCES are not sauces, according to the New Zealand Standards Association, which intends to remedy the situation, and has called for comments. The present standard requires that a sauce be “savoury,” and a number of other sauces, such as caramel, chocolate, and sweet fruit sauces are at present sold under the syrup standard. These will be encompassed by the new standard under the heading of “toppings.” The separate standard for tomato sauce will also be dropped. We wonder how many people realises that administering

sauce was such a complex business. Personal plea AN ADVERTISEMENT in the personal columns of a Wellington newspaper recently was honesty personified: “Slightly decrepit old joker, 54-ish, looks and feels older, bald, wrinkly, wears bi-focals, one leg shorter than the other, not a professional person but has own bike, small two-roomed bach and a nearly tame opossum, wishes to meet a comely, rich young widow, (no children, pets, or relatives), for mutual bike rides, short lop-sided walks and occasional sock-darning and 'possum-training sessions. Must be compatible but matrimony definitely a no-no. Own bike and television set an asset. Reply to ...” In an attempt to find out whether calling a spade a spade had produced results we rang the number. There was no reply. —Peter Cottier