Women are still India’s ‘2nd-class citizens’

Press, 3 February 1984, Page 18

Women are still India’s ‘2nd-class citizens’

By

JEREMY CLIFT,

Reuters, in New Delhi

Sex doctors are thriving in the land of the Kama Sutra, where families advertise to marry off their sons and daughters and a bride's marriage certificate can be her death warrant.

Women’s groups claim one bride a day is burnt to death in New Delhi because of arguments over dowry and harassment by in-laws. Now they have mounted a campaign against a system they say turns marriage into a business deal.

Marriages in India are still mostly arranged, and women are still widely regarded as subservient to men. A dowry is negotiated by the groom’s parents ahead of the union.

Despite an historic permissiveness which gave birth to such writings as the Kama Sutra, the classic Sanskrit sex manual, and the erotic carvings of the Khajuraho temples, India today is a country where sex is a furtive activity — at least among the middle classes.

Holding hands or kissing in public is rare. Seduction mostly follows marriage rather than precedes it, and although many of the old taboos are breaking down some couples are unsure how to make love.

Surprising ignorance about basic facts of life has led to a mushrooming of sex doctors in major cities like New Delhi, Bombay, and Madras, and their presence is advertised by big hoardings along main roads promising “Increased vitality” to customers.

Dr Vinod Sablok runs one clinic and says most of his clients are young people who are worried about their performance failing to come up to expectations. Often, all that is required is to ease their fears and provide a little advice. “Atmosphere, my dear, atmosphere. Soft music, dim lights, the right bed covering, that’s what matters, I tell them,” he says. For the girl, marriage can be a frightening affair to start with.

Under the Indian system of extended families, the newly married girl moves in with the family of her husband. Often, grandparents, uncles, and aunts will be under the same roof. Clashes with mothers-in-law or sisters-in-law are almost inevitable.

In a hostile house, she is almost defenceless if her new relations do not get along with her or start putting pressure on her to bring more dowry, get them a new television set or a motorbike from her father as a “gift.” The giving of dowry has been outlawed since 1961, but it is still very much a part of the marriage business in India, particularly among Hindu families in the north.

The dowry is normally fixed in a businesslike fashion, but in private. It can include cash, jewellery, a car, household gadgets, or property. Originally, a dowry was given to the bride by her parents. It was a sort of trousseau provided so that she would have some wealth in her own right and have something to pass on to her daughters. Typically, it was in the form of gold, jewels, or silk sarees.

Today, young brides are expected to bring a bounty of cash and gifts to the family of the bridegroom and the unscrupulous can see it as a means of making money fast. The size of the dowry is very much linked to the boy’s prospects, education, and social standing. A graduate of a British or an American university who is now a doctor, civil servant, or engineer can command a dowry of anything between $33,250 to $93,000. Even a poor labourer will demand $290, and a peasant family will be hard-pressed to find such a sum, plus the cost of the marriage

celebrations. Middle class families arrange marriages through personal contacts, agencies, or through advertisements in newspapers which are published across several pages of the Sunday edition. Typical ones will read:

• “Handsome Delhite. suitable govt official for sophisticated beautiful virgin 22 years B.A. Employed in central government. • “Really beautiful, educated, cultured match for a very handsome Brahmin boy, 27 years 166cms. Chartered accountant. Girl's merits only consideration. Caste no bar in deserving cases.” Some will specify that no dowry is to be given, but in most cases some tvpes of gifts are expected. Generally, the agreed dowry is paid and the couple go on to lead a happy, normal married life. But problems arise when in-laws start demanding more dowry than originally given. If the demands are not conceded, many brides meet with deaths that are curiously identical. In almost every case kerosene, used for cooking and lighting in many Indian homes, is poured on the victim and set alight. Many of these deaths are passed off as suicides or kitchen accidents. Because there are no witnesses, it is difficult to bring a case to court. “From the burner’s point of view it’s an ideal system because all the evidence goes up in smoke,” says Neerja Chowdhury, a campaigner for women’s rights, who writes for the “Statesman” newspaper in Delhi.

In what was hailed as a landmark judgment, a New Delhi sessions court sentenced three members of a family to death last May for the alleged murder of a 21-year-old pregnant woman. It was the first time that a New Delhi court had ordered death sentences in a bride-burning case. However, within six months the High Court had overturned the judgement for lack of evidence. Despite the presence of various women’s activist groups in the big cities, there is no real women’s movement in the Western sense in India. Even so, results are being achieved slowly. Legislation passed recently makes post-mortems compulsory for all women who die within the first seven years of marriage; in certain rape cases the onus of proof has been shifted to the man; and jail terms of up to three years have been specified for cruelty by husbands against their spouses. Many women feel they are still treated as second class citizens. They are often less educated than men, receive less pay if they work, and their status normally depends on that of their spouse. Girls are told from birth that they are “paraya,” or the charge of someone else — their father in adolescence, their husband in womanhood, and their son in old age. India is still largely an agricultural society and the urge to have boys in preference to girls remains strong because they can help out on the land. Girls in contrast are an expense, for whom a dowry must be paid on marriage. Because of this, boys get better treatment during childhood than girls. One survey in West Bengal has shown that among children under five, girls had a 60 per cent higher incidence of malnutrition than boys. While in most countries there are more women than men. in India the ratio of females to males is 93. 5. down from 97 per cent in 1901.

In the past it was pot luck whether a couple got a boy or a girl. Now doctors have developed a sex test for a foetus in the womb. Doctors say couples who opt for the test invariably abort the child if it is found to be a girl.