Special skills for future parents

Press, 28 October 1982, Page 12

Special skills for future parents

More parent education was described as a priority in the recent Child Health Report. ALISON NEALE, a field worker for the Family Life Education Council, outlines the council’s endeavours in this field.

Courses abound in just about everything today, from driving to mountaineering, to restoring furniture. Bringing up children needs more skill than any of these, yet learning about parenting is left to chance.

limited to girls or to the slow learners. Boys will also be parents, and so will the bright academic stream.

With the introduction of the Voluntary Organisation Job Creation Scheme and with the concurrent high unemployment amongst teachers, the Family Life Education Council, spearheaded by Nancy Sutherland saw its chance. For the last eighteen months, under two different schemes, field workers have been employed to assist with already existing family life education programmes in schools and community and to encourage other schools to initiate such courses. The council does not support any one way of bringing up children. It holds that much of child rearing is interaction be-

Reports on social work, child health and justice continually advocate parent education to help people bring up children safely and skilfully.

In Christchurch, the Family Life Education Council co-ordinates most of the voluntary parent education groups. It is working on new ways to meet the needs of parents and future parents. The old system of passing on parenting skills by word-of-mouth and personal experience has broken down. Many young parents have not had personal experience with young children. They are also often living well away from their own parents and from close family friends. Where do they turn for advice, support, and help?

Plunket, Parents’ Centre, Playcentre and Kindergarten are among the groups which provide expert help and the opportunity for young parents to get together and to learn from each other.

Through these groups parents learn about how young children behave, about what to expect at certain ages and about a variety of ways to discipline children and to encourage their learning.

But there is a need also for young adolescents to learn about children, and about their future role as parents.

The Family Life Education Council is pushing for more opportunity in the school syllabus for students to learn about family life and about how human beings grow, learn, and develop.

Submissions have been made to various Government bodies, including the Department of Education, and some progress is being made. It is important that such courses are available to all students. Too often they are

tween individuals, who react to each other as individuals.

What is important is that parents and future parents are aware of options and of the likely consequences of behaving in a certain way to, for example, a rebellious two-year-old or a withdrawn teenager.

The field workers and the teachers with whom they work closely, make considerable use of an American programme called “Exploring Childhood.” This enables adolescents to look at childhood in relation to themselves as emerging .adults as well as looking ahead to the children they may have. Films and discussions are used to explore such topics as the physical, intellectual, and social needs of children, children’s behaviour, discip-

line and the stages of child development. Although these can only be touched on in the brief time usually available, the hope is that the students will at least become more aware of the

responsibilities of parenthood, and have some idea of where to go for information about children.

An important part of most courses is the Parent Partner scheme, initiated at Hagley High School. Students are introduced to a young mother in their neighbourhood, and are able to spend time in her home, learning about the everyday stresses of living with babies and preschoolers and acquiring practical experience in coping with these.

This is valuable also for the mothers. They gain a real feeling that the importance of their work in child rearing is being recognised and they enjoy the opportunity to pass on some of what they have learnt about bringing up children. Students may also get practical experience irt a pre-school, to the great enjoyment of both boys and girls and to the benefit of the young pre-schoolers. In workshops, provided with paint, clay, dough and other materials, students relive their own childhood and learn about the importance of play. The Family Life Education Council is at present supporting a research project which examines how students feel about such courses. Other field workers are engaged in developing resources, to lessen dependence on American films and posters. Still others are working with community

groups, leading discussions on topics related to children and parenting. Life now is more complex than in the past. The simple nuclear family is no longer in the majority, if it ever was. Step-families, de facto families and single parent families are part of children's growing experiences.

To ignore this is to live in a dream world. The Family Life Education Council believes that every child has a basic right to a stable, caring family in which to grow and develop. The aim of the council is to help parents and potential parents work towards this within the context of present day reality.