Random reminder

Press, 12 May 1981, Page 23

Random reminder

let the seller beware

To the Consumer Council, while checking that our last dozen boxes of matched each had the “50 matches” stated on the label, we found that there is NO stated content. Is this not a breach of something? Think of all tha innocent children struggling to complete full-size models of The Wizard, for example, especially since ready-made toys are so flimsy that they must be tested first, which we did with a 500 gram hammer, but could find nothing suitable before being ordered nuire rudely from the store. What Fannened to ordinary decent standards of Service? That is what we asked our local cinema, when at interval the lights went out, to show advertisements, and

we tripped and lost our choc-bombs over the balcony. But after some argument with the manager, who kept excusing himself to go and "change reels,” we did get our replacement ice-creams and the last 10 minutes of the film were quite enjoyable. The price of liberty is eternal vigilance. Please accept an official complaint against “The Press” regarding its feature described as the “Random Reminder.” Certain days, notably Sunday, are less likely than other days to have a Random Reminder. Given this statistical pattern, the name “Random” is clearly in breach of the Accurate Trade Descriptions Act and we are sure you will help us get heavy damages, (signed) Fred and Mildred Crun, 42 Poo-bah St.