Criticism finds expression in Iron Curtain irony

Press, 10 July 1979, Page 21

Criticism finds expression in Iron Curtain irony

After several days of talks with the Chinese Chairman, President Ceausescu of Romania (population 20 million) finally summons the courage to pose a most sensitive question: “Mr Chairman, just how many political dissidents have you got in your country?” “Twenty million, I should think.” “But what a coincidence. I have 20 million myself.” Political humour — like this joke that was circulating in Romania during the Chinese Chairman’s visit to the Balkans last year — is a common phenomenon in Eastern Europe. With a tightly-controlled Press, plenty of official propaganda and an uncertain future for those who speak out, the political joke performs a special function: it enables people to talk about reality while risking little. Hardly an event, even a religious one, passes without a quip. Pope John Paul was not spared last month during his visit to Poland. By the end of the Papal pilgrimage all Western journalists had heard this one:

Party chief Gierek makes one final request before the Pope leaves for Rome: “Your Holiness, could you please arrange a divorce between Poland and the Soviet Union?” “My son, of course I can. But I am afraid you will have to pay maintenance.” Russia features prominently in Polish political jokes. Last year, when a Polish cosmonaut was rocketed into orbit with a Soviet spaceman, the coffee bar wits had this to deflate official pride: “What did the flight prove?” one Pole asks another.

“That a Pole can get loose from Earth — but not from the Soviet Union.”

Most jokes do not survive long but some are still around a decade or more after the events that inspired them. Czechs t.day will still tell visitors the conversation between two Russian soldiers in 1968: “You know we are here because we were called in?” one asks.

“Yes, but how long do you think we will stay?” “Oh, just until we find

out who it was that called us.” Then there is the Czech joke about the Frenchman, the German, the Russian and their cars. The Frenchman says: “I use the Citroen for work, the Peugeot for picnics and the Renault for trips abroad.”

By

PETER RISTIC

of the “Observer”

The German says: “We use the Volkswagen for work, the Audi for picnics and the Mercedes for going abroad.” The Russian says: “We only have the Moskvich for work and picnics, but when we go abroad we take tanks.” But not all political jokes are simply Russian bear-baiting — although these are the ones Western visitors might remember. The political joke is used to satirise everything from party privileges to the domestic economic situation.

One joke circulating in Moscow takes a hit at the generous perks for top

party officials. “Will it ever be possible to turn Switzerland into a Communist country?” one enthusiastic young Russian activist asks a party functionary. “Certainly. But wouldn’t that be rather a pity.” There are many wellknown jokes satirising the lack of freedom of speech. The East-Germans —who have a slightly different style from the Russians — have a joke about two anglers: “Why is it that you are catching all the fish?” the East German angler shouts to a West German fishing on the opposite side of a border river. “It’s simple,” comes the answer. “No one on your side is allowed to open his nouth.” It is in Russia that the political joke sometimes seems at its best. “What nationality were Adam and Eve?” one Soviet citizen asks another. “Soviet, of course. After all they had no clothes, there was only one apple between them and thought they were in paradise.” The so-called “Generation of Sacrifice” in Romania, with the country left short of luxuries and even basic necessities, has

produced this variation on the fish joke theme:

A worker goes out fishing and lands a big fish which he takes home to his wife. “But what can I do with it?” she asks. “I don’t have onions, oil, or anything to prepare it with. Take it away.” The worker returns to the river and tosses the fish back. The fish pops its head out of the water and shouts: “Viva Ceausescu.” Yugoslavs — normally rather witty — seem to be short of political jokes these days. But they always have one at the expense of their pro-So-viet Bulgarian neighbours. “Why are all the umbrellas up?” a Yugoslav visitor asks a Bulgarian during a heatwave in Sofia.

“Because it’s raining in Moscow of course.” And there is the wellknown joke to end all jokes in Eastern Europe:

Marx is given 20 seconds by God to return to Earth and speak on television. He stands before the camera, pauses for a moment and then shouts: “Proletarians of all countries — forgive me.” (O.F.N.S. Copyright)