Clothes, and a point of view

Press, 24 February 1977, Page 15

Clothes, and a point of view

By

A.K.GRANT

Well, it’s Royal Tour time again, and how good to know that the Queen was searing a sleeveless dress of crepe de chine as she walked through the crowds in Auckland. I realise that a lot of members of a certain sex tending to the opposite of my own are interested in what the Queen wars, and the practice of describing her garments in detail is presumably justified on this basis, but if that is the case then why is the practice reserved only for the Queen?

Why are we not told what Mr Muldoon is wearing when he accuses people of being picged up by the police for homosexual activities, and, even more relevantly, why are we not told what the subject of this accusation is wearing? Why is the Duke’s clothing almost never described? Or have I missed the point and is there considerable significance in the Queen’s choice of clothes? Does the sleveless dress of crepe de chine symbolise Britain’s attitude towards the admission of New Zealand dairy products into the E.E.C.?

Anyway, you will want to know that while watching the news item which

prompted these ruminations I was wearing a cerise blouse, jeans rolled halfway up the calf and Indian leather sandls made by an opponent of Mrs Ghandhi. South Pacific Television's new series, “The New Original Wonder Woman,” is apparently a ‘‘Batman’ ’-type programme, based on a comic strip and preserving with a straight face for humourous effect the cliches of the genre. Well, it may seem funny to aficionados of the comic strip, but certainly not to me.

I used to be quite keen on comics myself, and still remember, forexample, that Captain Marvel’s exclamation, “Shazam.” which wrought such a miraculous transformation, comprised the first letters of the names of Socrates, Hercules, Alexander, Zeus, Ajax and Mars; but I have yet to be convinced that comic strips can be transferred effectively to television, except perhaps in cartoon form.

Constructing a television series on the basis of a comic strip is like erecting a skyscraper on a trampoline. And the whole idea of sending up a comic strip seems to me to be misconceived because comics only work when, as children do, you take them seriously.

Once you start smirking at them the dramatic content evaporates and you are left with nothing but tedious campery.

“The New Original Wonder Woman” may have cast a potent spell over S.P.T.’s programme department, but 1 propose to remain unmoved by her.

Another excellent "Van der Walk,” although even this fine programme is not entirely free from blemishes; the particular blemish I am thinking of being the obligatory scene in which Van der Valk and Arlete are poised to enjoy some time to themselves when the telephone ring and the Commissaris rushes off to the scene of another crime leaving a stunned and resentful Arlette behind him.

I think we have all got the point by now, that policemen’s lots are no happy ones and that their marriages can be put under strain by their jobs. And, anyway, isn’t that true of all of us? I would like to have a winning Golden Kiwi ticket for every occasion when my wife and I have been poised to enjoy a quiet moment and I have suddenly had to preak off and review some appalling example of ull-frontal nudity or sexual explicitness.