Loneliness a problem

Press, Volume CXII, Issue 32861, 9 March 1972, Page 6

Loneliness a problem

Two-thirds of the calls received by the interdenominational Life-Line ser-

vice, run from the Methodist Central Mission in Christchurch, are from

women —and the factor behind the vast majority of calls is loneliness.

Rarely are they anything i but solo women—either de- i serted wives, widows, de- ; serted de facto wives, or un-; married mothers. But accord-1 ing to Mrs Ngaire Johnston, i Life-Line’s secretary, the most desperately lonely are i the women who have never i married and are living on ' their own. < “These women are mainly i in or beyond middle age,” : she said. “They may have retired from a job, or have i been looking after parents who have died. Suddenly, , they find themselves completely alone, with no friends or relatives, and are unable to cope.” DEPRESSION Often, said Mrs Johnston, i they turn for solace to drink or to sleeping pills—anything ■ that will hold off depression.! Or, in despair, they ring LifeLine. < “Quite often, all they need is someone to listen to their problems, but sometimes we 1 follow the telephone call up i with face-to-face counsel- 1 ling.” i Miss Ruth Keeley is Life- ; Line’s social worker, as well i as working for the Methodist ■ Central Mission. She visits j these people, talks with i them, and sees what can be done. i “Sometimes, all they need ( is practical help, such as ac- < commodation or advice on j where to find financial assis-1 tance. But sometimes deeper j counselling is required,” said Miss Keeley. Often such women—especially those who have been living alone —have built

up a deep resentment against society. They are reluctant to join any club or organisation, and their resentment has to be removed before they can take part in group activities. Life-Line helps as best it can, but finds that accommodation is a major problem. There is just not enough accommodation of a good standard and low rental suitable for such women. However, Life-Line often can help with money, by directing the women to the appropriate agency. EMOTIONAL SUPPORT “What all these women are lacking,” Mrs Johnson said, “is emotional support. They are lonely and confused, and need this support.” Most of ffie women who contact Life-Line are in the 20 to 30 age-group. The widows and spinsters are, of course, older. “What they need,” said Miss Keeley, “is to live in a balanced community. Quite often, if they get a State house, they are dumped in a street with other solo mothers and instead of fitting into a community and developing a sense of belonging, they only feel more and more alienated.” Life-Line can only continue its work if adequate funds are found to make up the $2OOO deficit suffered in the last quarter. A street appeal will be held tomorrow to raise funds for the service.