RANDOM REMINDER

Press, Volume CIX, Issue 31904, 4 February 1969, Page 20

RANDOM REMINDER

LANDLUBBER

One of our worthy citizens was jealous of his native city's fair reputation, and indignant of its title of the smoggiest city in New Zealand. So when the time came for his biannual rubbish fire to send its smoke reeking up to heaven, and its smudges on the washing of the lady next door, be took serious stock of his problem and his resources. How much would be acceptable to the Boy Scouts? Obviously only a fraction Of it. Could he afford the shilling fee to be paid at the rubbish dump? Yes . he could.

Could he borrow his neighbour's trailer to transport his cargo? Yes he could. But it was unregistered and had no warrant of fitness. He consulted his senior partner, who pointed out that he had a perfectly good boat sitting on its trailer in the yard where her hydrangeas used to flourish, that as far as she could see it had served no useful purpose for some time, and if he had dumped his discarded rubbish at sea instead of bringing it home, his present predicament would not be so great.

So advised, and with the true Nelson touch,

this bold fellow tipped his rubbish into his boat, hooked his trailer to his car, and set sail. His navigation was good, and he duly arrived at the pit. Imagine the cries of delight from those other worthy citizens whose duty and joy it is to prevent our rubbish dumps from becoming too full too quickly. He was somewhat overwhelmed by their welcome, but managed to repel boarders and elude the cutting out party. He escaped with most of his rubbish still aboard, and with his outboard motor intact. Next week he hired a dump truck.