RANDOM REMINDER

Press, Volume CIV, Issue 30804, 16 July 1965, Page 22

RANDOM REMINDER

NOT A SCIENCE, JUST A WAY OF LIFE

The economist shook his head sadly. Gambling? No thanks. No-one can win that game. The Government takes 20 per cent before there’s any pay-out. Obviously the dice are loaded against you, so why try? And of course the manpower engaged in feeding, preparing and riding horses could be usefully employed in another sector of the economy. Cigarette? No thanks. Just think of the amount of that smoke represented by tax and you would give it up too. In any case, it’s unfair that non-smokers should have to pay for treating those who smoke themselves into hospital. On the other hand, you just go ahead. If you all gave it up, our income tax would soar. No, I don’t have a car. Sales tax and petrol tax at the present rates make it

economically impossible. I have an excellent cycle, English of course, and it is singularly cheap to run. I did 2000 miles last year and had only one new tyre. Depreciation is low in the medium used bracket, but with new machines the resale value is disturbing. They just can’t hold the list price at all. A meal? Well, don’t go to any trouble. Personally, I get great pleasure from eating nothing more than bread and butter. You should eat more of it. The bread is a bit doughy sometimes and a little dry over long week-ends, but the butter is a good, uniform quality and is only a little hard to spread in winter and a little runny in summer. But the important thing is that both are subsidised. Isn’t that nice? Did you fry these in oil?

You should have used butter, you know. It’s quite heavily subsidised. Did you say something about fat? Well, of course, the State pays for our hospitals and they might as well be used. A whisky? On principle, no; but since your the host well, just a triple. Mind you, I can’t understand why people buy whisky. It costs, I understand no more than £ll 11s lid a gallon 8.T., before tax, you know. That takes the pleasure out of it, doesn’t it? No no, not water. If I’m to drink such highly taxed stuff, I want to moderate it. But not with water. Water may not cost much over the year, but you have to watch it. In any case, there is a far better moderator, for over-taxed whisky. It’s milk—very smooth and very subsidised.