CHEW THIS ONE OVER

Press, Volume CI, Issue 29916, 1 September 1962, Page 10

CHEW THIS ONE OVER

IBy V. HIM WHAM) British scientists have discovered a process for producing milk from many sorts of green leaves. They believe that when the milk is made on a large scale it should compete with cows' milk in price "simply delicious, much nicer than ordinary milk. We can produce the milk from almost all greenstuiTs carrot tops, outer cabbage leaves, pea pods, weeds, nettles and all hedgerow growths . . . ” News item As is well known, Sir, even in these Parts, Mankind some Years ago replaced the Horse With all its Hansoms, Buggies, Drays and Carts. By the superior propulsive Force Of Steam, and then but need I here rehearse That whole long boring Drama in bad Verse? Maybe it’s mildly interesting that now. Still less dependent on the Brute Creation, Mankind proposes to replace the Cow, That old slow Coach of animal Lactation A primitive Contrivance at the Best, And wasteful, if the Truth’s to be confessed: Chewing her Cud no faster than she did Thousands of Years ago, in the same Scenery, Her natural crude Procedures can’t be hid By the cleanest Shed, the shiniest Machinery. A Cow’s a Cow, there is no other Word The Peasant’s Pride, or Champion of the Herd. Useful she’s been, and Sacred in some Places. She knows her Job, she’s got a Talent for it. Enthusiasts praise her Character, her Graces Those who prefer this Aspect may explore It, The tragic Cow, the Romantic or the Comic. MY Concern’s solely with the Economic. What are we going to do with All these Kine. Sir, When better Milk is made without a Moo? Your Guess (as usual) is as good as Mine. Sir. I ask you still. WHAT are we going to DOI One E.E.C. r s enough! 1 can’t think how We’ll cope, when Europe Eliminates the Cow.