Parents, Too, Suffer From Examinations

Press, Volume XCVIII, Issue 29051, 13 November 1959, Page 2

Parents, Too, Suffer From Examinations

IBy

RUTH THORN]

Having nursed three scholars through “school-certificat-itus” I should like to assure you parents who are coping for the first time with the peculiar symptoms of this complaint that the looks of hatred you receive whilst doing your best for the patient will soon vanish, and the loving child you used to know will once again bless your marriage.

Do not think for one moment that you are the only person who has been forced to lay down such laws as:

Outings once a week only. No twiddling of radio knobs chasing request and smash hit sessions. No reading of classic comics as a quick way to cover the reading syllabus. No listening to excuses of “so and so hasn’t even thought of swotting yet.”

You’ve worn yourself out during the first part of this year trying to persuade your child that if swot is left to the last minute a failure is bound to result. And now that the last minutea have arrived you’ve changed your tactics to telling your now despondent child, “of course you’ll pass, dear?” Quite natural, I assure you. Over the years I’ve become a past master at changing my tune to suit the occasion. Famous Persons

It’s really amazing how the minds of school children take in the biographical scholastic misdemeanours of famous persons. Sir Winston Churchill is their hero, not because of his successes as soldier, statesman, and auther, but because of his “no-hoper” reports from school. Far worse than this for the parent though, is the burrowing into one’s own subconscious to find adequate reasons why one isn’t a success, because of failure to matriculate. This I admit is demoralising, and my pride has suffered severely through having to admit to such ghastly failure But never mind, there is still a chance for you to regain your pride. If your child does fail to gain 200 marks in his examination, you can always reverse the situation. Puff out your chest with pride, and say, “Look at me. dear. I did not pass, and I’m a success, aren’t I?” You can get away with all these remarks because your child is not quite himself at this time and his memory is so blurred with

examination data, he won’t remember a word you've said. Of course, you may be the parent of a brilliant student; if this is the case, please do not be alarmed if your child suddenly loses all his former friends (not studiously inclined). It isn’t his fault, it’s ours—the parents—because we’ve been foolish enough to compare our child with yours. Brotherly and sisterly love is also known to vanish during the pre-school certificate period, for the same reason. Yes, comparisons are odious.

Whatever you do, don’t blame the teaching staff for “taking it out on your child.” At this time, a friendly teacher suddenly takes on evil tendencies of an ogre. Once the exams are over “old sour puss” will once again be a “good sort.” Don’t Lose Hope

Your child suffers from headaches; is irritable and impossible to manage? Awful, isn’t it But the light of your life will soon shine again; in fact, blaze away to such an extent you’ll be longing for the good old pre-cert days in less than a week. Your next period of worry will come again around the end of January, when the results come out. You know what to do then. If your child passes, you go without little luxuries for a week whilst you- pay out the bribes you so foolishly promise to help your child to concentrate.

If he fails, and you can’t afford to send him back for another year, don’t worry. Tell him of all the prominent figures you know of who have attained successes in life without scholastic achievement.