IN LIGHTER VEIN.

Press, Volume LXIV, Issue 13249, 17 October 1908, Page 7

IN LIGHTER VEIN.

Piper: The varra post music I never heard whatever wos douu at Jamie Machui.ghlin'e. Thero wass fuftoeai o' us pipers in the wire back parlour, all playing different chimes. I thocht I was floatiu' in Heaven! —"Punch."

"Good night, you precious Ikmib!" said the mother, with the liberty ono sometimes takes, even with one's eon, at bedtime. "Mother," said the small boy beFeechiiigly, "if you must call mc something, wouldn't you just as soon call mc a bfliygoat ?"'—"Youth's Companion."

It is usual, in the family devotions of a household in Philadelphia, to ask ono of the d'cmice'tics, who join in the devotions, to select a hymn. On one occasion tho housemaid chose a hymn of such an entirely unsuitable character that, tho head of the house questioned he,r as to her selection. Sho was reluctant to answer. Finally, she .replied, "I took that one because it is my pcJiccman's number." While a penurious grocer was telling his new boy how careful ho must be, a fly settled on a bag of sugar. The grocer caught it amd thaw it away. The boy then said: "If you want mc to be careful, you aro soitinc mo a bad example." ''Why?" asks the grocer. '"Because," said the boy,"you havo thrown, that fly away without brushing the sugar off its feet."—Tho "Argonaut."

A country parson was ono day going his usual round of visiting, when ho was stopped by ono of his comgregationi, an old farm hand, who said, "An' hoo be yer darter this marning, yer reverend.?" "My daughter!" exclnim-ed the parson, rather surprised, "Oh, she is quite well, thank you." "What!" cried the rustic, "quite well! Why I heard) she had a cycle aeoidietnt yesberdiay, an' busted her inner, tubing!"— The "Argonaut."