OUR MAIL BUDGET.
PROFESSOR BLACKIE ON MARRIED HAPPINESS. In the December number of "Cassell's Magazine " Profe_or B_ckie delivers himself of sundry maxims which he considers will tend to married happiness, and which can be briefly summarised as fol. lows: — ~_!' V Whatare yourexpectationsof married life? If you expect to find it a paradise of delight and a field of clover you are sure to be disappointed. Expect from it only a more sacred sphere of moral sympathy, and the best school oi moral training, and it is not in the power even of a bad husband to deprive you altogether of the rich spiritual blessing of the bond. " 2. It is not in the power of the most sagacious young lady to discern the character of the future husband in that of the present lover. . . . Look therefore, for a certain change in the character of your present admirer. The best woman in the world would be spoiled and become intolerable if she were habitually to receive such tribute and such service as lovers so lavishly offer on the shrine of their idol.
" 3. Men are naturally less amiable and more intractable than women. The drat point, therefore, to secure a married woman's happiness, after the holidays of the honeymoon are over, is that she should study carefully the peculiarities of her husband's temper. Let no woman foolishly attempt to gain from her husband in a rough way what she can surely achieve by gentleness. "4. In your study to master your husband's temper, do not forget to keep a Arm hold of your own.
"5. Obey your husband in all reasonable matters. When he becomes Imperious about crotchets, take your own way and smile bewitchingly. "6. Always attend conscientiously to the kitchen and pantry ; also to the wardrobe, and, if you have children, to the nursery. But beware of becoming altogether a mere housekeeper or bring—-up of bairns. '• 7. To ensure the continuance of your husband's love, behave so in all points as to command his respect. "8. Dress well. Good dress is a sort of poetry addressed to the eye, which it ia in the power of every well-conditioned woman to compose; and a woman who has no taste for decoration is aa much out of nature as a bird without wings. "9. When you wish to obtain anything from your husband, and have reason to anticipate his refusal, choose with delicate care aiavorable moment.
•" 10. Don't annoy your husband with officious displays of loving attention in small matters when he is busy, and occupied with affairs of serious concern. "H. Bear, in mind also that your husband, though a very important person in your eyes, may be a very small person in the eyes of the world. Do not, therefore, be eager to bring him forward on all occasions, quoting ail his opinions as if he were an oracle, and discussing publicly his small peculiarities, as if the manner in which he smoked his cigars .and shaved his beard were a matter of parliamentary concern. To parade your husband after this fashion is the surest way to. make the man appear ridiculous and the wife petty. .... Whatever bis faults, a man naturally expects sympathy from his helpmate in the first place, and not criticism. " 12. If your husband is a weakling, and cannot manage his own establish—ant properly, you are entitled to assume the reins by the law of the stronger; but in doing so be careful to use this superiority wisely, and to display it as little as possible. . ... No proper woman should wish to exercise any power over her husband save that whicjh is the natural and quiet result of conjugal love and loyalty, acting in harmony with thegraciousneas and the tact which are the characteristic excellencies of the sex."
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Press, Volume XLVI, Issue 7263, 24 January 1889, Page 5
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633OUR MAIL BUDGET. Press, Volume XLVI, Issue 7263, 24 January 1889, Page 5
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