Catching a Colonel.

Bay of Plenty Times, Volume XX, Issue 2847, 27 June 1892, Page 4

Catching a Colonel.

""' liecoi. -iel of theß< d Huci&rs was an Irish n «vn, *he *at v* proud of Ms BationaU.v an it is, j.vß?*ibJe, for at* Irishman to be, and tnat is not saying a little bj any means. He earned Ms jJatriotitm so farjia to mi tbat holonly were the Irish the finest, the most courageous, tbe moat gifted, of |be four nationalities, bol; that nearly in f^ wa^y great Englishmen were Iriibmeb. He justified this Hiberatanftm hy a mode of Veatonint; which fifes Mg^y origin*!, »mt n*t Wholly 1 tinvinemg. It wculcTfi"ate provoked ■kmts ot laughter -in the meat If ft fcariproagffted froth tb6 lips of a sub So, but tt* colonel was an altoer different )>erscm to dtal with. l^, g #o<ld be (Ifcbgercms to quarrel wT&Ubhb, and ltt walls* peppery at a tog, or at old maid who has beef! jilted by the carat*. It Wat ABila'eled far more, adffsable 'to fias;hita bisbeid,' a^d let him-ex-must himielf Dy thi violence of bis CHSwVuOrHK , , -^ 6 When he JaunchW out on Hs fi^ntite topic, therefore, be wan lftliMMl to in disrespectful silence by iMNwbdrdinatfs, but in revenge it mj&d greatest delict of the wngs or^me Regiment to mitnic bis voice and mariner, hnd to represent him as gsg the feideit atfftln^iiig Hi^erfal«eboodii, girnished with t)«is expressions df a wholly procharactef. This was called Old Bit,' and was a very popular Ttmrisement in every messrbom wkre tfce Colonel'g {fersotfahty was kgtftrn. His rtfct aame, of course, as tKQ|rM> List will tell yon, Was Crt^el Dominick Sydney Power, but tlu*#*a comparatively trifling detail. Hirtftd been nicfr-oam&l « Old Fat '] at 1 Terr early stage of bis military cafHt^Sud 'OM PaY of tbe Bed Hossirif wm almosj as well known thtonghdit the iervice as Cox's bank, or^fe Sold tnWt tnrin to Wokiog. Hw»f ore, #ben tbe Ited Msiari hwird tbat 8!r Jm&B iMacleod bad Mm p^tM from the filaen to tneTr own regiment. cOnjeciHTf. ran very rife among tbt ofS^;>»f Sir lames would cpiUrfve to bit it ofF amicablr •ritb .'t),% f&? ,.,lfc wa? geri^raify felt that tHe stranger would tirobaW $!&*• > of the *%¥*$ * W% Sr" a ?*w, ™ T s? aiiotment of Scotch pride and patriotism, while, nQ doubt, after his experiences in the Blues, he woold be i a dined to regard % mere colonel m a bussar regiaaent with more compassion than reverence. Uttder thetie circumstancje»,T there seemed to be e^ery prospect of some lively.anjl exhilarating scenes when thti colonel should dMi ft flfttiri^ t6 take tbe Scotch baron** W6 ]hn <*blifi^hce on the important tut)^t of national diß--11 It will bo trtat fnn if Ifo&ffi for 1 0!t »ft^ jAd^Ve* It i»it& bot, when h« I>etiiiß the ulball frit, f ta'id young fmhtm w^ht and jt #sj generally agreed kWphg the junior Amc«fi of the f^gitnent that it would BvjSrvvc x^Q^i inueeu. '• m MWffifhiffi were cornhit td ibis rrigubordinate decision, Colonel. Domimck P#er Wab engaged in i^a^Jl^ a fo^ Tetter From an old ihoolfellow of nitand a former brother oiBSSr ~of 3ir JSBies MacTeocft to who© fee bad writfen a few day prerioxWy la order td r make come lnqniries with regard to tbe new im portation into the mess-room of the Kea Hussars, and^the baronet's ttotirtss for effecting tbe 6xchan^©. * A woman is at tbe bottom of it, as usual,' wrote Captain Fletcher, of the Bides. * Macleod was very bard bit, and she threw bi&i over for no reason that anyone can diving pure devilry tbo-fr*tt. He kn^ that you were ordered abroad, andbs wants to get out of tbe country jfitboat appearing to ran awar. That's the bait. He is %^c#prtnl ftJlcw ;^o - — nonsense •boat him in any* way; is a good sportsman; AH rdni^ itat; and very popular in the regiment. There is only ontSt^t>iDtonWbicblbad J betfercati > tio'n! you. Doflt het with him. He is a veryderil flfms %n^ %lW»ys wins.' •Irbe indwd?' ,mtt»ed Colonel . Power; ' and he max &* $* T ®' T d» v^ bimspll for aJL Wll get out of me. . It's \mt\f l^at would li^e to see th. coipnel ol toe regiment betting with % mere wSipp^fina^per of a eubaltern •^liiiWlt^oinW, too. v^ Bif Mcleod * proved to be a tsll, fkir man, whose long features aiid hWh chctkboiies testified ?ery clearly that tbe; place of bis birth lay beyond tbe Tweed. He was not remarkably good looking, but he carried himself with iuch an air of distinction that it seemed wonderful m young Fanshawe said, that any woman could throw prer * such a dasher, and a real live baronet to boot. ' Hi* manner j however, was tbat of a thorough man of the world ; and it is not remarkable, under the circumstances, tbat he got on at once with tie young men who Were to be his companions for the future. * We thought you would be no end of a heavy swell,' paid young Fanshawe in a day or two, 'during which friendship bid ripened into familiarity •butiouainVa biV. Whereat Bir James Macleod laughed good-bumoaredly. * Wbtit »*ball you do when Old Pat begins bis usual rot/; continued Fan~ sbiH*e. -iq ft xjonfidcfltial tone, 'about Ir<fL>4d Hiiig the r fiiie*t country in the ur irew, iwid ejjrfbedy jjlse being miserable tcarecTOWs and outsiders Sball you sttck up for'*AuTd Beekie?' I winb you would. It would make *What oo you Wean- ?* inquired tbe otter. „«,*■.. V- %»^

Young ITa^sbawe explained bis; tneatirfg at some length. 'And you think that be would b? furious if anyone contradicted him?' inquired Macleod fixing a very wary grey eye ou the other. ! 1 Furious ? I think he would have • fit.' v Macleod deliberated for a moment with tbe same wary expression of eye, and then be said quite quietly — * I will lay you two ponies to a £snote that if you will draw tbe colonel out on bis favourite topic, I will contradict him on every point, we will bate a most angry discussion, and at the end tbe colonel will be as goodbumoured and pleased as if — well, as if I bad put £100 in bis pocket. ' 4 You don't know Old Pat, 'replied Fansbawe, sbakiog bis bead. ' He'll make tbe regiment too bot to bold you in less than no time. '

' Well, sball I book tbe bet ? • Buggested Macleod, felandJy. 'No; I won't bet on a certainty.' ' Are jou sure, ' inquired Macleod, with an sir of doubt, 'that it isn't that you don't feel— quite— up— to drawing Old Pat ? f

' You may book tbe bet, ' cned Fansbawe, haughtily, and bis ckeek flushed with anger. ( And if you lose you will have no one to thank but yourself. *

1 Quite so, ' said Macleod calmly, and he made the entry in his pocketbook in tbe most businefltf-like way. 'And if I lose-— well, at any fate I shall afford you some amusement ! ' And so it £came about tbat tbat that same evening after dinner, when tbe wine was circulating pretty freely, and a mellow glow was beginning to make its appearance on the Colonel's ripe visage, young Fansbawe, to tbe consternation of tbe mess, proceeded to introduce the subject of a certain deceased Irish politician. ' What a scoundrel that fellow w«S !' said ypting F^nsbawe apropos of potbiDg, ami dragging tbe dead leader into the conservation prtcisely as Mr Dick u»ed to hoist King CoarJi* the First's bead into tb« ' Memorial.'

The other nubs looked at young FaDdbawo with an axpreAidfi hi abasement. Had be goneout of his •enleir; or Mi \hh wise fot ififo bis bead ? Closer inspection, however; showed that he looked unnaturally sober and tinufually in^eili|«nt. Then, there must be some game on— pome game at the colonel's expense. Tbis would probably be good sport, and it would be as well to be in at the death.

Every eye was therefore fixed on t^e colonel. Old Pat, wais not to be drawn by i young $ ansbawe. He snorted indignantly, but reserved bis steel for worthier foes. The circle of watchful eyes now turned to Faushawe. What would be bis next more ? •My pater has just bought a hogsh<ted of the finest Scotch wbieky/ sajid the youtb, coming up to 't,tme with commendable 1 alacrity and a cheerful smile. He launched out into some details on the subject, and his intentions thereto, concluding with the following s%nificfcnfc remark: 4 I bate Irish whisky. It tn such sickening, ioipy stuff. I think Scotch it much the better.' I A joyful gleam shot in the attentirft optics. This was getting interesting. Young Fanshawe was actually of malice prepense * going for ' | Old Pat. 4 Hooray ! Yoick* ! Tally ho ! Qfo it, young Faoshawe!' were tbe sentiments reflected in the breasts of that hopeful youth's brother subalterns; while even the major, who certainly ought to have known better, grinned with iutense enjoyment. 1 Don't you think so, Macleod V said young Fansbawe to the Scotchman, who was cracking walnuts with the Utmost insouciance.

'Don't I think what?' he replied. ,' That Scotch whisky is better than Irish/

• Why, of course. Can there be any doubt? Does anyone dispute it ?' This sally Was too much for Old Pit. He plunged at once into tho fray, and a heated discussion ensued. At least, it was heated on his side, for Macleod retained an appearance of judicial calm which would have put J6b himself in a Bad temper, You n g Fansbawo, it may be added, at once leized the opportunity to retire from the forefront of the battle, and took up the safe position of an interested spectator.

In a comparatively short time a great deal of unpalatable information was shot upon the colonel. H« was told that not only was Scotch whisky tar more pleasing to the taste than Irish, but it Was less injurious to the health, and there was less of illicit distillation in Scotland than in Ireland. WarmiDg apparently to his subject, and totally regardless of Old Pat's passionate and profane defence, Macleod went on to enunciaie the View tlu^«il tbat was really good* and great iv tue Irish nation was English or Scotch in origin, that the Irish colonies in English towns formtd the most criminal and degraded portion" of |the popu^tion, and tbat there was actually something m tbe climate or the soil of Ireland which deteriorated the physical and moral character of the inhabitants. He said this with the calm utterance of a lecturer who demonstrates facts. There was even a softer undertone perceptible now and then, as if he pitied the advocate of so miserable a cause. Tbe colonel became almost incoherent With rage. His face assumed a deep nurple hue. He manifested an inclination to foam at the mouth.

be continued,)

trating executed in one, two, thiee or more colour* at tlie effifce of this paper.— Advt.