FLOORING A MAGISTRATE

Bruce Herald, Volume XXI, Issue 2178, 27 June 1890, Page 5

FLOORING A MAGISTRATE

An amusing scene was recently enacted in a court-room in a country tbwh. The magistrate, a high pompous official, with a voice like a trombone, took it upon himself to examine a witness-r-a little,

withered old man, whose face was as red and wrinkled as a smoked herring.

"What is your name " asked the ustice.

" Why, Squire," said the astonished witness, "you know my name as well as I know yourn."

"Never you mind what I know or what I don't know," was the caution given with magisterial severity. " I ask the question in my official capacity, and you're bound to answer it under oath."

With a contemptuous snort the witness gave his name, and the questioning proceeded. " Where do you live ? " " Wel), I declare ! " ejaculated the old man. " Why," he continued, appealing fco the laughing listeners, " I've lived in this town ali my life, and so's he," pointing to the justice, " an' to hear him go on you'd think — — " Silence ! " thundered the irate magistrate. " Answer my question, or I'll fine you for contempt of couit." Alarmed by the threat, the witness named his place of residence, and the examination went pn. " What is your occupation ? : ' "Huh?" " What do you do for a living ? " " Ob, get out, Squire. Just as if you don't know that I tend gardens in the summer season an' sell coal in winters !" "As a private citizen I do know it, but as the court I know nothing about you," exclaimed the perspiring justice.

" Well, Squire," remarked the puzzled witness, " if you know somethin' outside the court room an' don't know nothin' in it, you'd better get out an' let somebody try this case that's got some sense." The advice maj„have been well m'Saht, but it cost the witness -£3,