FOR TOURISTS ONLY!

Auckland Star, Volume LXX, Issue 29, 4 February 1939, Page 2 (Supplement)

FOR TOURISTS ONLY!

NEW ZEALAND, alias "God's own country" (don't ask me why), is situated just about as near to the edge of the world, on the wrong .side, as it could be. it consists of three main islands, Stewart Island, which is much smaller than the others and beautifully aloof, and the North and South Islands, which are terribly jealous of each other and always getting the huff with each other. The country itself is narrow and for the most part hilly or mountainous, with plains and busli here and there It is extremely volcanic and is likely to disappear under the sea again at any time. But you -will have plenty of opportunities for studying the New Zealand landscape from the windows of your train— in fact,, if you were really keen to see just how high a mountain, was you could probably liop out and dash up to the top and down again in time to saunter on board the train at the next station. You see. New Zealand is the only country in the world which can boast of using exclusively • the genuine pre-train. Pre? Well, what would you think? But I'm not writing an essay on New Zealand trains—although I could. Oh, ves —what couldn't I say about that cute locomotive that stops in the middle of . a field for a quarter of an hour for absolutely no reason at all—at least you can't think of one until another train thunders past and. we creep carefully 011 again, and you guess that that was what we were waiting for—though goodness knows why they couldn't wait for lis. Fauna and Flora Xew Zealand hasn't much fauna—just a rat and " a spider and the Maori , dog which can hardly-be called indigenous to the country even if we wanted it to, which I don't think we do particularly. But it has an awful lot of birds, and a particularly funny one called the kiwi, which can't fly and is rapidly dying out. A good deal of its flora is to be found

By--Elizabeth Upton

in the bush, which is not altogether surprising since New Zealand was originally almost entirely covered with bush and fio, of course, it wouldn't have anywhere

else to grow. New Zealand was first discovered in about 900 A.D. by a chap called Kupe— a Maori (pronounce his name as though lie invented coupes, not kewpies). So, you see, although it is such a young country,, it is really quite an old one. After Kupe.spotted it,* hordes of Maoris came over in canoes and it is from the navigators of the first three canoes to reach the shores of the Long White Cloud, as they picturesquely called the country, that the best Maoris, which, of course, means all the Maoris' in New Zealand, claim descend. They had been here some time when Abel Tasman, snooping around, was the first white man to discover it, in 104*2. but, unfortunately. Tasman was mistaken by the Maoris for an enemy and was forced to flee. Then Captain Cook came along iii 1709 and shot up and down the coast giving picturesque names to places. (See map.) After that, England, still feeling a bit sorry for herself because she had made such a bungle of the American colonies and determined to show that she could be a good mother, decided to colonise Xew Zealand as well as Australia, and various governors came out and settlers arrived and had a terribly hard time at first because, of course, they were the pioneers. For "further information, wait until 1940 when the centennial is taking. place— it'll all be dislied up again then. Of course, the. Maori did not like the white men, or pakeha, a bit because the latter bought land from..-"them for a couple of blankets or a few tomahawks and because they, the Maoris, were there first anyhow. A good deal of fighting went on and some.of the Maori chiefs really made a great nuisance of themselves to the pakeha. One of them, Hone Heke,

cut down the flagstaff at Korarareka (skip it) three times and three times it was put up again, so that he didn't really get anywhere anyway. Still, no doubt he got a kick out of it. Eventually, however, they signed the Treaty of Waitangi—-and you know the rest. ..Their original home is unknown and we first hear of them in Hawaiki, Polynesia. Jt is thought that they came from India, but some Maoris have been seen who have noses just like Red Indians, so that there is a possibility that they once lived, up in North America. There is also a theory that they came from Ireland—no doubt they just got sunburnt coming out—but, anyway, it's all very vague, and what really matters is that they eventually trooped down to New Zealand where they have staved ever since.

They are' picturesque, musical people, possess a great store of legends, and have many quaint customs. • The one they enjoy the most is the tangi, a ceremony pertaining to death at which everyone eats an awful lojt and sits round decorated with green leaves and wailing. The People of New Zealand

The adjectives most generally ascribed to New Zca landers are '•kind,"-"hospit-able," and "stodgy." It's rather a pity about the last, but apparently inescapable. Some attribute it to the food we eat, but the safest and vaguest answer is ''our isolation." That excuse serves for everything that is wrong, with New Zcalanders. When people say we haven't any culture we retort glibly that it is because we are so far away from the older countries and so haven't any opportunity to get any. Eventually we'll make, our own .no doubt, but as. yet we're too young a country. That's another excuse which serves many purposes. As a matter of fact, though, we really haven't had much time for culture, .we've been too busy pushing our -way through the legs of the older countries like the small child we arc, to our place in the sun as "the social laboratory of the world"—and after all that's sumpin'!

In the same way '.we are dull and apathetic and lack pep because you simply can't get all excited about things

when you're thousands of miles away from tiie rest of the world, and they're all over by the time you hear about them, anyway. And if we are somewhat narrow-minded and conservative it's, because you just can't go cosmopolitan when you're all alone. So having blamed everything 011 to our isolation, which satisfies us as well as others because we don't care much about culture, anyway, we are free to pursue our beloved sports. New Zealanders have a complex about sports yon know. They arc all either one or the other kind of sport-sman, viz., spectator or participator. It's the sole topic of discussion apart from politics. The rest of the world caii have a bye when there's a meeting at Ellerslie or when Ponsonby and Manukau are kicking a ball around at Eden Park. There again New Zealanders believe that because we're so far away no one will ever bother to attack us and the affairs of other nations can't affect us very much. The only time foreign affairs ever really came into their own was during the crisis when, of course, New Zcalanders were affected. And did that make them sit up and take notice! Newspapers with headlines even bigger than 'those • used for race results were devoured until our mouths tasted "crisis," people huddled over their radios, and Hitler was shot hourly.

Tourist Resorts Russell, Bay of Islands.—Actually there is not a great deal to see here except an old church with interesting bullet holes all over it—that was Hone Heke and Ins friends, of course—and across the water, Waitangi. Russell itself is just a tiny place with cows wandering happily across the main street.

Auckland is not the capital of New Zealand, but it is everything else, to Wellington's disgust. Everything about Auckland is to Wellington's disgust. You see, Auckland always bags everything first—at the moment she's relaxing after having been made the new air terminal. Still, Wellington's grabbed the Centennial Exhibition and she's still the windy town which Auckland, being the capital of the winterless Xorth, can never be.

Rotorua.—This is the centre of New Zealand's thermal region, which means it is precariously situated in the middle of a lot of geysers,.inud pools, boiling springs, baths, and a nasty smell. However, residents say that.after living there for 20 years you don't notice -this sulphur smell. Tiie town itself is quite safe, of course, but once away from the main streets you have to be horribly careful where you walk.,;. It's really best to

get a guide to tag along with you everywhere. The Rotorua. people will tell you with, you suspect, the merest.touch of pride that just after a certain.visiting member of Royalty had departed for some other function the place where sho had been standing blew up! Within hailing distance of Rotorua is Lake Taupo,. which is a mouldy little hole really, but famous as the best troutiislring resort in the world. You haven't fished if you haven't been to Taupo.

The Chateau, Tongariro National Park. —Ostensibly people visit this resort to climb live miles to the ski-ing ground and ski, but in reality they just lounge about indoors having a murky time.

The South Island:—-The scenery .of the South Island is the grand type—rugged mountains, lakes and sounds and glaciers. The main points of interest about Christehurch and Dunedin, the two chief cities of the South Island, are that the former is perfectly flat, so everyone rides bicycles and .also passionately English, and, Duuedinj; which is further south, is violently Scotch. The Southern Alps are used-mainly for climbing, ski-ing and deer stalking, and. if you like flowers,. perhaps you could pick alpine daisies..' They're very pretty. Of course, there may be a law about them, like the bush, but, anywav, it's not very important.

There is also a lake district, just like England—all 2ve\v Zealand, as well as Christchurch, is proud of being "more English than the English"—but these lakes are much more beautiful, of course. And there are also fiords, which are as good as Norway's any day, and Milford Track, which is & walk lasting for about 10 days, so\d*m't attempt it unless you're that sort of person. Of course, there arc huts all along the way for you to sleep in and you do most of it by launch, anyway. .

That's just a very bare description of New Zealand, but I'm sure it's helped von to understand why it's called "The Playground of the Pacific." Or hasn't .it? If it hasn't, then I'm afraid you're not the kind of tourist we like.