THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXIX, Issue 226, 24 September 1938, Page 8

THE PASSING SHOW.

I (By THE MEN ABOUT TOWN.) J I ! Islefort's story about the Communist. I Nazi and waterside worker is very apt, but j the latter could not have been a true unionist. ; but merely a despised I THE UNIONIST, 'teapull." A real unionist j would have kept his eye j on the clo'-k and knocked off at 11.45 sharp. ! Had he fallen in the water at 8 a.m. lie would not. of course, have commenced swimming until 5.20 a.m.—Fifty-hour Week. j Ae a rule when thoughts centre on honeymoons one does not allow a vast space for the imagination to roam about in. Still, some people have ideas all NOT HIS IDEA, their own. and in this section are the publicity agents. A writer in the "San Francisco Chronicle'' has evidently received some of our Government literature extolling New Zealand's attractions, and he remarks that tiie said literature informs the world that New Zealand k "definitely tlv- place for a honeymoon. - ' The reasons given are: It Hatred mountains, placid lakes: sports from ski ing to deep sea fishing; duck, pheasant and deer for huntsmen; trout. swordfisli, mako shark, for fisher- , men; golf. tennis, howling, polo; with major ( industries such as sheep, cattle, timber, fruit ; and mining. The writer remarks that it. is j not. his idea, of a honeymoon. It's not mine, | either. —Johnny. j • ! The meeting between Mr. Chamberlain and Herr Hitler on a vessel on the Rhine for the purpose of further conferring on the Czechoslovakia n crisis recalls an HISTORY interesting episode in RECALLED. European history some 131 years ago. In .Tune of ISO" Xapoleon and the Czar met at Tilsit. 1 To ensure absolute secrecy—the object of the meeting being a secret treaty—the conclave took place on a laft moored in the River Xieryen. The treaty, as is well known. wa» entered into, one of its terms, being to erect a barrier against British trading per the Baltic with Central Europe. How the terms of the , treaty became known to Britain still remains a matter of histories] conjecture. It must be remembered that the swiftest method of communication known in those days was by means of a courier on horseback and a sailingvessel. Three weeks after the eventful meeting. Canning, the British Foreign Minister, dispatched a fleet to Denmark to break the blockade, in which it succeeded. It is believed that British diplomacy to-day, in spite of the tirades from certain quarters levelled at, the British Cabinet and its head, is as efficient as it was in the davs of the great Xapoleon.— J.X. I have been wondering whether, in these days of repeated political broadcasts, the political canvassiT has not become a little I superfluous. Politics are CANVASSERS. literally in the air. We hear little else, and read little else. Wherefore the roan (or the woman) who .conic* chattily to the backdoor to talk to us on the same old theme is, at the best, handing out a rather threadbare line of sales talk. Some people resent the canvassers. I don't. Some there are who -will tolerate only those who represent the particular >hade of politics that is favoured in the household. Down the road there is a man to whom this political stuff is as the breath of life. To those canvassers who represent his view of things he is a long-lost brother. When they happen along thev are taken inside, the wife bustles round and produces the steaming teapot, and there is quite a friendly little party. | But. with the other sorts, there, is a cold, distant and definitely hostile interview with the canvasser held well without the door. It. seems so unnecessary. Xow, for my part, I don't make much of a fuss of any canvasser. If he seems a reasonable sort of chap—well, T'll yarn to him a while, for I am the sort that loves to yarn with almost anybody. There lis no need to argue. A little lie, in politics as in other things, turneth away wrath. I just don't care two hoots what shade of politics the canvasser represents—l am always on his side while he is there. It eaves the bother of arguing. It does me jio harm, and it possibly does him a lot of good. He goes away feeling that he has done a good stroke of business for the good cause, and he -won't be peeping over my shoulder to receive any pangs of disillusionment on election day. I think the policy is sound. It prevents, the canvasser from becoming a pest or an enemy and helps to keep the fight clean.—B.O'X. One reads in your column interesting fish dories, both credible and incredible, but few. if any, are properly authenticated. It does not seem sufficient for THREE IN ONE. any fisherman to simply recite the incident; some sort, of verification is. necessary, otherwise a "fisherman's story"' would not have become analogous with a "fairy tale." For the information of your piscatorial contributors, the : following fish story is vouched for by Dr. Victor Heiser, M.D.. who wa<s present. He, distrusting the credibility of his fellow man, i wrote an account of the incident and had an > official affidavit underwritten by the principal actor, one General Wood, and sealed -with the Great Seal of the Philippine Islands. That any similar experience submitted by your readers must have some equal verification is, you will admit, only fair and reasonable. Xow for the story: General Wood va« fishing with Dr. Heiser from a boat, when the general's line Tan out slowly. It was hardly thought worth while to reel in, as the fish was obviously a email one; however, the general was winding in when the line suddenly ran out with that whirr, ping sound so dear to all fishermen, "A bigger one than you thought, doctor?" said the general. "Not too big!" retorted Heiser. who in the clear water had seen the fish. As it was being reeled in, whirr, ping, ping, went the line with a run. "Xow perhaps you'll admit it's a big one," said the Army. The line toiled out for its full four hundred, yards and it took an hour to bring the fish within gaffing distance, when an eight-foot shark was with difficulty got aboard. "General," said Heiser. "that's never the fish you first hooked!' "Oh, I don't know about that. It's a fait catch, anyhow. Beginner's luck, T suppose.* The doctor, in true "busman's holiday" tradition, performed an autopsy on the shark First a three-foot Spanish mackerel was pro jduced. and inside that a ten-inch polka-dottec | lapu lapu, with the hook firmly through it: | lip. So the different ideas of size of the I fisherman and spectator were explained. Yot j will agree that Baron Munchausen in his palm\ I days could hardly have bettered this. and 1 i idoubt that your correspondent "B.C.H."' coulc I 'equal it. Should he. or others, enter the lists j let them produce similar evidence in support ! but something more reliable than the seal o! the R.F.L. and B. Association (Tnc.) will h< 'required!—.T.W.W. . i THE FARMER'S VIEW. J The farmer wrinkled up his brow i As he was milkine his favourite cow. I think that he was wondering how They would fix the price for butter. He thought the price last year was low. All his expenses seemed to grow. So much in taxes had to ko — Then something he did mutter. Rut when he heard the latest price Tip said. "This rea'ly is not nice Of you. Friend Nash: take my advice And give the farming man a show. For If you don't, at this election The farmers for their own protection Will turn away from your direction And National vote, and out you go." —COCKY.