THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXIX, Issue 225, 23 September 1938, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEN ABOUT TOWN.)

I have not read the book "Gentlemen Prefer Blonde*!." but I do know the o!<t expression, "A fair thin- is a fair thin?.' and. as the chap said when Ik* I CRUELTY TO bought a suitcase at the CABINETS. Railway Department's lost luggage auction. "There is something in it." The Hon. P. | Fraser has been asked this embarrassing question, "What would bo the Government s 'attitude towards conscientious objectors T I His answer anent the people who had genuine [convictions calls for comment, but it war- somewhat modifie<l by his subsequent statement that "if a hostile cruiser came to New Zealand conscientious objectors would bo subject to the same cruelties as anyone else. He 'refrains from ?ivin? us the details of the ["cruelties."' but doubtless the tortures include ibein? "broken on the (common) weal." "torn iby horses" (sec Gamin? Act), "stretched on the rack" (see Social Security), or even forced J into Cabinet rank. '"But still." as tbe tough l«uv savs. "win- worry? They can take it." — iB.C.H. *

A flock of starlings? Xo, decidedly not. A "murmura tion" of starlings is correct, or 80 I gleaned from an old book which I was browsin? in recently. NOW YOU KNOW. Here are a few more: A

sege of herons and of bitterns, a herd of swans, of cranes and of Icurlews. dopping -h" sheldrakes, spring of teals, [covert of coots, gaggle of geese, padelvnge of ducks, bord or snte of mall.'ird-. muster of peacocks, nyo of pheasants, bevy of quails, covey of partridges, congregation of plovers, flight of doves, lepe of leopards, herd of herts. of bucks and all deer, bevy of roes, sloth of hears, singular of boars, saunder of wild swine, drvft of tame swine, route of wolves, harass [of liorses. rag of colts, stud of mares, pace of asses, baren of mules, team of oxen, dull* of tnrkevs. walk of snijie. fall of woodcocks, brood of bens, building -of rooks, exultation of la r ks. flight of swallows. ho<~t of sparrows, charm of goldfinches, pride of lions, watch of nightinsrales. crowd of squirrels, drove of k:nc. flock of sheep, tribe of goats, soulk of foxes, cete of badgers, jidles of martins, fesnes of ferrets, huske. or a down, of hares, nest of rabbits, clowder of cats, kendel of young cats, shrewdness of apes and labour of moles.— Isle fort.

"Thp power or energy which operates through Nature, animate and inanimate, by which her whole system is suspended," writes

W. Macneile Dixon in a WHAT'S AN ERG? rpmarkable volume. '"The

Human Sitnatio n." "manifest#? itself, modern science teaches, not in a continuous unbroken current, but is discontinuous. that is, periodic, rhythmical. , . .

All energy displays itself in spurts or gusts in units or particles, described as ergs. . .

The principles may be seen at work everywhere and in everything. Our diseases display the same discontinuity. Fevers have their rhythms, returning in strength 011 the third or fourth day. and in certain types of mental disorder there is a similar recurrence. Language, too. is essentially rhythmical. Wp make our accents strong or weak. Tn all words which consist of more than vine syllable tlipre is always accented and an linaccpnted syllable. Go deeper and study the phonographic record of a single word, and you will find it consists of a series of minute vibrations. The word 'Constantinople' on such a record shows five or six hundred." It is worth noting I that all languages do not follow the same rhythm in relation to syllables or vowels or | consonants. One of the most instructive talkies that "Touchstone" ever listened to [was l>ased on the dissimilarity in rhythm between French and English." The demonstrator showed that a Frenchman was unintelligible to an Englishman when he spoke in English according to French rhythm, and that the difficulty was completely removed when the English rhythm was mastered.

His friends agree that Mac must surelv be one of the town's brightest young men. They say that any time Mac goes to a partv the party is sure to be TAXI RIDE. good: that nobody can caress the piano kevs with Mac's abandon; that Mac can keep his feet after everybody else has dropped: that Macs careless philosophy of life and his regrettable habit of forgetting little responsibilities are both indicative of his lovable personality. Well, anyway. Mac was asked to a party o\er at Takapuna, and when he accepted the hostess' heart was glad; if Mac came, she knew that her partv must be a success. And it was—a delightfully noisv. long-winded success. And when Mac was told that the last ferry would be leaving in fifteen minutes, and that he could not sleep in the |bath. as that was reserved for his friend from ;Xew Lynn, he asked the son of the house to call him a taxi. The taxi driver spoke sharplv " Wl,ore <ln . vo " live?" he snapped. Alcohol Avenue. Mount Eden." mumbled Mac, unthinkingly. And away swept the taxi. Mac slumbering on the rear "seat. When Mac awoke he found the cab pulling up outside i s in Mount Eden. The taxi man of course, didn't know that Mac thought he was only going to the ferry, that the fare would be half-a-crown. On the Xorth Shore taxis are not governed by city scales of fares. The journey across the harbour to Mount Eden, including vehicular ferry fares, cost Mac 25/. That's why Mae has had to go without his party-goer's potion for the past three weeks \\ e saw him yesterday, and he told us that he hated taxi men. Tliev're dishonest he , says and they're too quick to take advantage of other mens frailties.—Mouku.

r n end of mine often len<l * me his copv of the Tyrone Courier and Dungannon News." an Ulster weekly newspaper which thrills some thousands of readers with POLITENESS. its powerful editorials on

I-* ~ pig*- One item under the headinc "Ballygnwley Xotes" o an«ht mv eve Here ,t is: "An Able Official.—We have' -reat pleasure in alluding to Miss McKiguev.'who is an assistant at the post office. Mis* McKi<*;ney has shown herself as an able official, while the public are daily met by her amiable and courteous disposition." The first thought is that this is indeed news, for it is well known that official* in post office* are more concerned with their knitting or the weddinot a mutual acquaintance than the sellino- of postage stamps to impatient customers "bne wonders whether this court esv campaign in Dungannon has resulted in an increased sale of stamps in the neighbourhood—and if stamps then, of course, stationery. To send letters i means to receive tliem. and the sales in other j parts of Ulster, and even in New Zealand may rise to such heights that the demand for paper and pens may start a new industrial boom. I hope that Miss M.-Kignev receives • the preferment she obviously descrvei. even to a seat in the 0.P.0. in Belfast More seriously, though, what a stdendid idea this ( is. Miss McKignoy's colleagues will strive to .earn their names the riuht to appear in the ( ooiuniiiß of the "Courier/' becoming evor more courteous to customers and knitting small comforts for the editor. Tt might even be a way of reducing the toll of the road, for now a motorist only finds himself in the headlines if he has sinned. Let the "Star" lead the way by dropping all news of "fatalities." and put in their room little paragraphs like this: An Able Driver. We have great pleasure in alluding to Mr. Peter Laurence, who drives a motor car. registered No. 3-2.VV Mr. Laurence has shown himself as an able driver, while the public are d*ily met bv his amiable and courteous disposition."—P.L.C.