A PAIR AND A PICTURE

Auckland Star, Volume LXIX, Issue 81, 6 April 1938, Page 22

A PAIR AND A PICTURE

RIDDLES.

JOKES.

The children were looking at the stream that ran through the woods. "This is fine!" Lionel said. "Let's dress up and he Indians in a canoe." "Feather head-things and all that! Oh. jollv." cried hi* sister. So the children left their little collapsible boat all ready on the bank of the shallow brook while they ran bark to the farm where they were staying for dressing-tip things. Presently, with chicken feathers gummed to cardboard head-dresses, clothes made of coloured paper and with their fares beautifully chalked, they marched back to their boat and pushed off on the water, which was just deep enough to float it. '"Whatever is that going along?" cried Lily suddenly, pointing to a bobbins? article floating at a little distance ahead of them. "Don't know. Paddle hard and see." "Hoots!" burst out the chihlrcn together as they drew near the mystery, arid a minute later they had fished in lirst one big. new-looking boot, then its mate, to find, to their surprise, that each one had a smart eock tucked inside it. "Well!" exclaimed Lily after they had had a good look. "People do throw all kinds of things into rivers, but surely nobody would be so silly as to lliug away new hoots and socks." "Of course not," her brother agreed. They had got some distance upstream when they saw a young man running distractedly about on bare feet. "Hi, you youngsters!" he shouted, as lie caught sight of them. "Have you seen any tramps about? Somebody has stolen my —" But before he got the word out the children were joyfully waving at him his missing property. "Well, I'm bothered!" he cried when he had heard their tale. "Then it was my own fault for leaving them too near the bank. They must have fallen in while I was having 40 winks. You see, I'm a newspaper photographer, and I had been tramping about in these new boots till my feet wens painful. So I bathed them in the stream; then I suppose I went to sleep." And after he had gone with the children to the farm to dry his boots and socks, he took a picture of his Indians in their boat on the stream and gave them half a crown for the picture he was going to sell of them.

(Copied by Phyllis Rawlins, Kerepeehl, Hnuraki Plains.) Q. What is the difference between a soldier and a fisherman? A. One uses a bayonet and the other nets a. bay. Q. Why is j the merriest letter in the alphabet? A. Because it is impossible to have a jest without it. Q. What's the difference between a wicket-keeper and a policeman? A. One runs you out, and the other runs you in. Q. When doe»» baby resemble a teaspoon ? A. When it is a-teething (a tea thing).

(Sent in by Phyllis Rawlins, Kerepeehl, Hnuraki Plains.) "Why were your socks on the wrong side out ?" '\My feet were so hot, I turned the hose on them." Teacher: Your history was bad, and T told you to write it out twenty times! You've only done it seventeen." Boy: My arithmetic is bad, too! A young husband returned home to find that his wife had spent the morning baking a lovely tart. "That's a nice tart?" he safiL Tint why did you make it so long?" "It's the same length as the rhubarb!" replied his wJle. _.v