The Editor suggests

Auckland Star, Volume LXVI, Issue 170, 20 July 1935, Page 2 (Supplement)

The Editor suggests

Florence Smart—lt seemed tome neither "The Daisy Chain" nor "Mother" were quite up to your usual standard. The sentiment in "Mother" is worthy, but it has frequently been Setter expressed. June Cain—Your verse was quite skilfully done, June, but hardly suitable for our pages, do you think? IWary Fletcher—Sorry, Mary, but these are not quite good enough yet. Try to think of something- to write about that you haven't seen in Verseland before. Phyllis Roycroft—There is a certain amount or promise in your original verses, Phyllis, but they are rather awkward in expression sometimes For instance, phrases like "And the sports to very much enjoy" would be bad, even in prose. Try to express your thoughts simply without straining after the rhyme always. Lena White—l was pleased to see your first attempt for our Verseland corner, Lena. It is not quite up to publication standard; four times is rather too often to repeat one line in an eight-line poem, but try again soon. Patty Murphy—You started ofT well with your parody, Patty, but it didn't seetn to liave any ending. I was expecting to hear another story about John Gilpin, and was so disappointed. Margery Smith—You have been more careful of -the rhyme than of the meaning in your verses, Margery. Rhyme is or should be subordinate to the meaning, and that is why some of the best poetry is unrhymed. Anna Christensen —Your poems are usually very good, Anna, but I am afraid "A Fairy Song" was not as original as most of yours. You have the knack of combining fresh ideas with words that are not Hackneyed, and that Is very refreshing.

Ruth Phillips—We always like our members to try their hands at topical verse, and this is a subject well worth trying. Your lines sometimes do not scan very well, but otherwise it is a very praiseworthy effort. Jean Cochrane—The sentiment in your ode is very commendable, Jean, but It needs to be expressed more freely, and in words that are less cenventional. Mary Ellis—Quite a good idea, Mary, but we have had better poems than this from you. Phyllis Ward—lt is hard to write a poem about evening and make it original. So many people have written about it. you see. Why not try to find a less used subject? Pat Haughey—l was pleased to read your little poem about New Zealand, rat. It Is not quite so good as one we are publishing, however, so it had to be left out. Margaret Luxford —I appreciate the sentiment in your verses, Margaret, but I do not think they are quite suitable for our corner. Please send us some more soon. Qeorgena Gaunt—This is quite well done, Georgena, but the trouble is that it has been done so often berore and almost In the same words. Try to write about something you haven't read before. Betty Broyd—l am afraid it is too late to publish your poem on autumn, Betty, as we are past the shortest day. It treated the subject much bettor than most of the verses we had about it. Yvonne McEwan—l am afraid we cannot publish your poem on autumn. Yvonne, for the same reason as I gave Retty Broyd. The idea or the Lady Autumn giving a party is a pleasing one. Agnes Hill—l liked your little poem, Agnes, but I am afraid it is too much like some others we have published. Send in some more soon, won't you?