EPITAPHS ON THE LIVING.

Auckland Star, Volume LIX, Issue 177, 28 July 1928, Page 7 (Supplement)

EPITAPHS ON THE LIVING.

• Anticipatory epitaphs are a very old form of appreciation and satire. The Greek epitaph is hardly distinguishable from the Greek epigram. In our own literature we. have Oliver Goldsmith's '■"Retaliation," inspired by Garrick's not unkindly jibe:— "Here lies Nolly Goldsmith, For shortness called Noll. Who wrote like an angel And talked like Poor Poll." Goldsmith "got back" on David and the whole Johnson circle in his famous series of epitaphs on their living selves. Kensal Green's similar adventure is good. Here are three:— '•SIR HALL CAINE. Hall Caine here waits the trumpet call Which 'will not worry him at all. He knows he'll get the recognition That's due to one of his position." The best is this:— "G. K. CHESTERTON. 1 Place on his hand the jewel, on his brow the diadem Who in an age of miracles dared to believe in them. Chesterton companion His companions mourn. Chesterton Crusader Leaves a cause forlorn. Chesterton the critic Pays no further heed. Chesterton the poet Lives while men shall read. Chesterton the dreamer Is by sleep beguiled: And there enters heaven Chesterton . . . the child." Or this: — "H. G. WELLS. God found the universe Coing from bad to worse. Si> He said. Send for Wills. Something within Me tells He with his common sense Ontvies omniscicnce.' Sci the great Azrael came. Mentioned his Master's name. Mentioned his errand, too. Said, 'We have need of you.' Wells said, though looking gluui: "Very good; say I'll come . . " Evidently H.G.W. wanted to finish something for the Press. If so, we admire liim for it.