IN THE EMPIRE'S SERVICE

Auckland Star, Volume LIX, Issue 165, 14 July 1928, Page 15 (Supplement)

IN THE EMPIRE'S SERVICE

FIFTY YEARS WITH THE R.C.I. MAJOR BOOSE'S STORIES. DJXKGATE WHO DID NOT LIVE JV ; A BOTTLE. j For lilty yonr« M;ij«ir J. ii. l>uo?o. 0.M.G., rendered faithful (service to the] Koval Colonial In-titiiti l . iir-t :i- a clerk, then succcsMwly as librarian, secretary, 1 and travelling coiiiihUmoiht. Ho happy in Li» work. and in association;. oini hi.- reiiiiniii-ein-I'6 are pleasantly diversilitnl ■with reinmis-wiii'i'.-. and anec- • i'jtorj of the lighter kind. L'Jio Major's rather umi.-nal stirnaiuo has caused liirn a jr<M»l deal oi trouble and amusement in his day:— "T well rcinemlxT an fininsing incident which occurred on the occasion of my \is it to Caljrary.: vbeu j was the guest of the Canadian Clul>. .1 arrived ill the eiiy from Lriti-h Colin I>i ■ ill the early morning, anil allcr taking a bath and having a change after the long and dusty railway journey I went into the smokingroom of the hotel and looked through the morning newspapers. Under 'News of the Day' the following cnuplit my eye: 'Mr. .r. it. Boo.se (as usual, without an acute accent on the e), secretary of the Loyal t olonial Institute, will be the ■jue-t of honour at the Cfc'crary Canadian Club to-day. This will be a record event. It will be tho iirst occasoion on the club will enjoy Boose at its festive board Jn .New Zealand, again, nun-h the same thing happened:-— •"Again my name supplied good c copv, : tor ones of 'the "Wellington newspapers, which pointed out that spelt as tho name is, when the linotype ignores the allimportant accent, it is apt to provoke luino amusing misconception. For instance, it is stated when I was in Wellington a messenger in a Government department, instructed i>v his chief to ring up various hotels and clubs to find out where I was staying, duly telephoned, but pronounced the nauio as 'Boose.' From one leading hostelry, where the clerk is a bit of a wag, caino tho reply: 'The only '"booze" in this hotel is in the bar in bottles, and doesn't walk about that I know of.'" The Sultan Arrives. Major Booso lias had a long and varied experience of official dinners and receptions—those- somewhat lugubrious and artificial functions convened by learned societies and the like: — "I have good c-auso to recollect one occasion when the Sultan of Johore was a special guest. The hour for dinner liad already arrived and I was on my way to the entrance liall to await his arrival, when I met a gorgeously-attired individual in an Oriental costume of blue and yellow satin. I naturally came to the conclusion that this was the Sultan, and, bowing respectfully, asked him to accompany me -to the reception room. He appeared to hesitate, but as the hour for dinner had arrived and the chairman was anxious to commence, I got him to -,i with me and introduced him, quite innocently, to the Duke of Manchester as the Sultan. I then went off to acquaint the head waiter that v\e were ready for dinner, when the Duke came after me hurriedly and somewhat excitedly, and in terms far from complimentary, severely chastised me for having introduced the Sultan's cook, who after I left him in such good hands bad tied precipitately from the room. _ In the meantime, the Sultan arrived attired in European costume with a black fez and a diamond aigrette."' A Short Way With Long Speeches. Public dinners mean interminable speeches, and Major Boose does well to recall "the story told by Sir Arthur Balfour of a chairman who, after himself speaking for thirty-five minutes, said: •I will now call upon Mr. Jones to give bis address'; whereupon Mr. Jones said: 'My address is 3, Buckingham Palace Eoad, and I am now going home.'" Major Boose travelled widely in the Dominions on behalf of the Royal Colonial Institute, and saw and heard many amusing things:— "In talking of the work of the missionaries, I was told of one worthy man who on each succeeding Christmas Day was in the habit of inviting the chief of a neighbouring tribe to visit him, when they had a friendly chat, and the missionary presented him. with a pair of blankets and a bottle of rum. This went on lor several years, when the missionary was removed to another district. On the following Christmas Day his successor invited the chief to his house and after the usual talk presented him with a pair or blankets. The chief waited, and after an exaggerated pause in the conversation, when he appeared to be thinking deeply, said: 'What about de rum, san.' The missionary replied that he did not intend to give any rum, whereupon the chief said: 'All right, sab! No more rum, no more Allelujah!'" A Biblical Puzzle. Here is a pleasant little story of that great Canadian, the late Sir George Parkin:— "My voyage to Canada was rendered far more enjoyable than it would have been owing to the presence of that remarkable man, whose cheery greeting each day Was in itself a joy. "Whilst taking his walk round the deck one morning he slapped me on the back and in his jovial way asked: 'Who was the first man mentioned in the Bible? I will come for the reply later on.' One naturally jumped to the conclusion, 'Fathei Adam,*' but after a considerable amount of thought, not only by myself but brother passengers, we 'gave it up, and the reply at once came, with a merry twinkle: 'Chap. I.'" liven members of the Koval Colonial Institute can stumble. While _ Major Boose was official librarian, a chairman s innocence was amusingly revealed: '•The committee had met mainly for tho purpose of books and I submittal amongst many others, 'Waterhouses Mammalia.' The chairman, after inspecting it with what I thought more than ordinary interest, passed it along to the member on his right, and turning to me whispered in a most confidential manner: 'By the way, where is Mammalia?' I was naturally at a loss for a suitable reply, the result of which it would be difficult to forecast with any assurance. In the words of the Parliamentary reporter, no reply was given."