PARISIANA

Auckland Star, Volume LVIII, Issue 136, 11 June 1927, Page 30

PARISIANA

AN INDIGNATION MEETING. (By GEORGE CECIL.) The irrepressible Mussolini's ill-con-sidered hint to the effect that Italian bachelors living in Paris and in other towns abroad, will be taxed, has raised a storm of protest. There are, for example, Italian waiters in France, especially on the Riviera, who are no more in a position to marry than to flv. Paris also contributing many a needv '"garzone di eaffe." Nor, for that matter, can every Italian proprietor of a French restaurant anord a helpmate, while some have not the slightest wish to exchange the proven advantages of single blessedness _ for the unexplored benefits oi matrimony. True, each Benedicts married friends strongly advocate the ■Redded state as the perfect existence— they never cease harping on the subject. But these eloquent counsellors usuallv have a sister, a cousin, or a widowed mother-in-law in view . . . "Xo thank you,' say Giacomo and Giovanni ... Recently some ninety Italian waiters employed in Paris cafes and restaurants called an indignation meeting to protest against "the upstart Mussolini's impudent ruling." All were unamimous in condemning the interfering politician, who, according to the aged wine steward at a semi-I tali an establishment, is "not even a blessing in disguise." Decidedly a nasty one for the Fascist leader. " WILL BOTTOMLY EDIT THE "DAILY MAIL." W hen Bottomiy was laid by the heels, lew Paris newspapers alluded to his affairs. The name vr,s unknown in i ranee; neither the charge nor the trial had the slightest interest for the FreDch. Lately, however, the announcement, in a cock-sure English daily paper, to the effect that next Christmas may see the late editor of "John Bull" a tree man, has found it 3 way into a sprightly Paris journal. A most entertaining leader is devoted to the convict's financial career, to his racing activities, and to the innumerable cases otf champagne, which, though supposed to have been consumed by Bottomiy, chiefly disappeared down the capacious throats of his hangers-on. The article ends thus:—"England being a singularly forgiving country, no doubt the remarkable Bottomiy will edit the 4 Daily Mail.'" Another newspaper, which is conducted in facetious vein, refers tw the fervour with which Horatio sings the hymns when attending service in the prison chapel • • • • ""Why," asks the editor, '"shoudl he not become a missionary? He is known to be possessed of convincing eloquence" . . . Very true, but Victorv Bonds and a change of religion are not exactly the same thing. And Bottomiy is too old to master a heathen's vernacular.

HE VERSING THE OKDEK OF THINGS. The proprietor of a Paris dancing club, noticing tnat many a young girl went partner less, determined to remedy t^ r deplorable state. A few evenings ago, upon the weekly dance taking place, the tender-hearted fellow dalightpd the ladies—and electrified the men—hy announcing that, after every three items on the programme, the Messieurs were expected to seat themselves round the room in order that the "pleasure Of a dance' might be demanded of them. . . "Imagine that you are of the more decorative sex!" added the waggish man "Fan yourselves! Look coy! Twiddle your thumbs:"

The innovation succeeded admirably Girls who formerly had been partnerless secured partners at least lire tknaa during the evening, and even more, ainoe, c<ne tiling leading to another, tfca galliat -Messieurs improved the occasion. Indeed, one cavalier was so enraptured of the young lady who had solicited the honour of tangoing with him, that he danced no fewer than sixteen times with her. Rich, handsome, of good family (seven of his well-born ancestors were guillotined at the time of the revolution), generous and sedate, it is thought by every member of the club that he really means business. Thus does the "light fantastic" assist matrimonial projects. . . . The excellent scheme is being adopted by other clubs. The hearts of spinsters beat high. k MUSICIAU SMITES MANAGER. 1 The other afternoon, while the frequenters of a oafe terrace savoured the daily aperatif, heartrending groans suddenly disturbed their serenity. At first it was imagined that the manager, an 111-teaspered fellow, had murdered h» *"fe, a vixenish creature with a pronounced moustache. These fears, however, quickly were dispersed, the presence of an elderly Savoyard, plaving the cornemuse, having explained "the blood-curdling sounds. The good-natured armab] y up With the discordant noise, rewarding the ajzed nerp°ST X ST 17 twart y s ™ <•»«!£■ virtuoso, as though he were tpickpocket away. The affronted old man, disDlavlng wonderfui agility, aelaed Ma baL ££»& v l ?nD l ipal drone - *nd u3 the wmdchest much as a harlequin mamf pulates the bladder, smote the insulter on a super-bald pate. The smitten one I !\i a i - of blind **B®' caught up a table-knife, and no doubt would have assasinated the venerable musician had not the bystanders interfered. The bellicose soloist, with a final blast from combined drones and chaunter, left the fray unscathed. Unmusical though the cornemeuse is, "somthing resembling an air** mav be' extracted from it, especially by a skilled player. Distance, however, as with the Scotch bagpipes, "lends enchantment" to the sound.