THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LVIII, Issue 87, 13 April 1927, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MAN ABOUT TOWN.) Many a Court official found it hard work to keep a straight face on April 11. 16W. j when William and Mary were crowned to- j ••other i" Westminster LONG AND AMk-v. Together, these SHORT, unfortunate folk carried the sword of State, the Queen Win? fift in height and the King oft -Jin. ' You can imagine the sjK'ctaele. There i- a critical moment during a coronation, when the monarch produces gold and make® an offering. Both the Kinjz and Queen on that occasion searched in their pocket® and looked blankly at each other. They had left their purses at home! The Loid (haml«erlain supplied the ncce-sarx" twenty guineas. hut history doesn t say whether the King stumped up. In those davs thev used to advertise at coronations by dev ice- eui banners. Medal* with in-criptions on were thrown to the crowd, but. s' the crowd couldn't M>cnd them, they were not popular. The Soccer parliament met last night. and. a - they hadn't got a ball, they kicked a little! badinage ir.un t<«e to t..e. Everybody know®! lliat Auckland badlvi THE MAYORS wants plenty more playing j JEST. and the Mayor, who va- there, think- -o too. ' Mr. Hugh Mackenzie. chairnr. n of the I HaiboiM" l!.<ai<l. incut i«>u<-« 1 in a solemn rianrioi ; that h'- boa id had offei.-d sixty a.-re- in .ludgc'- ! I'.av for plavjng field-. Mr. Hai'don. who i- at pre-ciil ii: excellent lighting foiin. K-t-Tted that ;:s far a - he could judge f ro;n pre-ent indiea- j tioli-. t hei e would be elie>ugh mud thi own during the municipal election- to Jill no the said bay. ' ' I A bit of Biiti-h Iludg, t new- dc.ltics that j Briti-h women indulge in fitly million hat- i per anioiin. An ci.emv <f w oaienkind -uggc-tcd to the Chancellor that if . SUNBONNET alO per cent ta\ were put ' BILL. in ladie-' hat- the tax would let urn to j lie Troa- | -urv the nobby sum of 1 i<m*i per annum. | and tile poor wee man -aid lie had blood enough ! on hi- hands already. Women'- h.its aie a ! • loaning iny-teiy to men. Sixpennx worth of 1 lel t with a lag ' a I he; ilie wheel on it will -<•!! 1 foi either .'t r./.'l, <.r i.'{ l.'S Villi caii i imagine The iieee-«;ty of i lie «!«• — iulj«-i - and seller- "pa-«ing < i," the t.i\. explaining. of caut-c. that it w.i- an 'ov ci liead" charge. Tliil- a liat i that cost tli-- .-eller eight j-eiiee aii<i wa» Usiiallv . -1 *1 «t l"i 1 - would I*- clienji at 1 The i woman pays* Not at all! 1 lie man pais, but !..i- nothing whatever to <io with pi ice. (hie | mi.placable mail says that if he had hi- way '".lie p >or w retch ha- fne unmanied daughter-• j lie wo:;ld tiv to get a ."-unbound Bill pa-sed ' making women's headgear uniform at oii<- price preferably IlillCJH IKv. Thele Wotild 1-e fewel heal 1 burning- and heavier pur-c- if w omen liike ii.en i wore hat- a- unifoim a- rwas in a pod I but thank l'i o\ id-lice theie i-li't a liojk"!i. When Auckland is b0n.1.e.1 from the air. and incendiaty enemy im—age- aie dropfK-d I (with a fair windi on Ponsonby. it wiil not matter much whether thenBOMBARDMENT are forts on the Heads an<i OF AUCKLAND. Mount \ ictoria or not. 1 lie contempt the average cow has tor protective masonry, once designed to make Mount \ ictoi ia -ate for elemocracv. i--howfi by the coolness with which Strawlwrrv walks across the roof of a visible gun-chamber, i and so secures a splendid view of the finest ! harbour in the world. When Kitchener came . to Auckland his one available eve took Lardlv [any notice of these fortified mountains, and it i is understood he scorned them. Our glorious heritage, the Heads, is partially occupied bv a ' number of hideous tin military shod-. Sucecs- I | sivo generations of artillery, having nothin" j useful to do. employed their time destroving ' the natural beauty of the entrance to the inner harbour. Military men can make more mess id ' le-s time than any other class of people. ;uni 1 engage in tasks u»o!ess beyond human computation. Somel»ody iof course a -'rangerl Jooking at that very nice hiil. Mount V ictoria, said it would make one of the most glorious junks oil earth if affect innately treated. It simj-lv horrified the habitual Aucklander. who had! look".! upem it a- sacred to weeds, u-ele-s prov<vativc and vi-ible military ma-nnrv, and a- a signal station. Ill" la-t. of eor.r e. is indispensable. but vouid in no v.,, y int.-if,-re with any scheme f>r a great paik \. hich Would I-- a b...i,i and a i.h—ing t.- tile north of N.w Zealand. Even malevolent defence tmk'.'iing ha- nut wholly de-tioved it- lieauty. Hamiiloii ( lumber of ('ouiinei , e p:ot<-1s at the prevalence if hoi:-- t■■ house traveller-, who hawk atid gather nioiicv f,•] vario-.i- ---< •lij.-ct 1 jie v j a ll"e a - THE DOOR OF ~nd well know.-. HOPE. from determined gentlemen with -tern jaw- who beg for Chinch -u-tentation fund-, to e.piallv v "lui'le and aggre—ive ].. ixm- win -<•!! "t iie :ni--u- shaving s.kij. that the hu-band -hie- at when h.- t oi,ie> home, lor the admirable men who care not who ,-er- iin m cariying round -IX clothe- prop., or the incrcdiblv Courageouw omen Who eanv pack- a* big a- themselves and Wl;,. keep a s : ek hu-band. ~ne has nothiii" but admiration. Ihe va-t h<.rde of who carry ;l lin\ -uitca-e an.i thiee ton- of cheek are only admirable for th.e latter oualitv. 1 hey usual!v po— r -» a -econ.l -en-e. 1 hev "Ceili to know v. hen the nia-ter of the l;on-e l"- ! tmmuird at bu-ii.e„. \ w.ak or frightened l wo m a n ;- lair game f,. r men who aie nieiviv jiariali-, in-i-ting on seliing u-ele-s aiticle- at u-efnl pi ice—. M.-t ~ti/x-n-' heait- bleed for ; the per-o„ who j. known to !„. j,, I)m i ( asnv come to tbi• ii'."i'e ii iii-/ii.■ ■ , pro]K-.iv ac< uaintci! w It 11 the need. A few week- ago -uluibaii man uiiex-l-ecl. dlv aimed at 1,;- home dllMllg the m,e „ lug to 11 ar a heated voice at the back bul._Vi.ig hi- wile. All It llleii.li; gentleman Maroaring out demand- for nioiiev in sui.port of 1 -oinethmg or other tpn bablv him-..], , j h( . 1 : 11 /.i u sudden and angrv pp-a, av eau-ed 1 the woman to - U ] ; . J, a<l ?"t the Uniei a;r. wa-n't a bit glad. 1 J.t ■{ !♦•»!! ; Wu.-to., i hui.:,ill j. g 11; ii.." i< al, i,,a: ve - v .)., 1 1,, ~ mult ij.lieat ion on ! aling with ha I f ovv 11a 1 e al wa V > I li.. n , ,»• REDHEADED ~-tent to'ir, , F;,TI1CIIM11U teach «-haiicc• 01 . ENGLISHMAN, ho.v ,0 juggle with !.,!• 11,,, 'ions. \\ in.-ton'.- resiie. tcd l>a, I-"id Kandolph Churchill, vva- al-o 1 -uj.ieme gut to the critics a,ul cartoonist- , !«- depicting 111 m as every kind of anim-.l ''.eluding a terrier, and in eveiy contortion . ch„,chin i ~ to 1„- f ;U]l( . r uho Wj;< hap t.ie «-.,eekle-t statesman in - cou.se. he may have go, ;l „ oiig.nal slrain 1^„ Ills American iuothei.% It j. f thai the harried Chan.-Hlor i- 'j.V detect,V,- speecii and that, despiw this, he he-i"-'vr ; ""1 <-nclu-,o„ s into thickcH v'avlVr 1 - OW, !, VVkh ,lea,ll - V |WMe.,«' ll'it ol<l cm liinti « - . , the son of "Han.lv" vvas ca'ptured' V hil ~ in the Sou,!, African War indT 1 V ' ■ I great deal of guile. ''' u *"ig a . lb- vva- f..: i„ , h( . x , j pa|•(•. -a- a little i.-dhead- d Kn-'; 1, ' the finder was asked to ki-k- V a " home. Winston i, o', , h ' m , an,i hhn for the illustrious familv' n.Ti - I"*J of i lias been hate.l. loved '~, h 'f h liC Wn n S s ! "»• i-p !< - -ntuit: 1 «"■! A few iimi o it.lunts { neither here nor there .. " ,l ! chill. Now, suppose Mr i'l , r" r a U,i "' been in the saddle ' " ow<lo » i.ad S*rden U § let loreli«4 CWr) m lllc j