RANDOM SHOTS

Auckland Star, Volume LVII, Issue 276, 20 November 1926, Page 22

RANDOM SHOTS

-_MF>III_-2C

It is announced that French scientists have discovered a method of utilising the sun's rays to generate power. Very little interest to Auckland. Helpful "fill-up" paragraph in the "Star" the other night, which reached mc as I was sitting over a fire listening to the fierce rain on the roof: "The daily rainfall of the earth amounts to about 10,000,000 tons a second." I reckon that most of that fell here in the early part of the. week. I We have been taught that light] travels at the rate of 180,000 miles a j second. A scientist now announces that his calculation gives the speud as 153,873.5 miles. It is no wonder that there are so many stupid people about. The light takes so long to dawn on them. Something that might have been expressed differently: "At last evening's meeting of the Beach Society, the chairman stated that a lot of nondescript costumes were making their appearance. and that in tho absence of any printed regulations on the matter, it was difficult to approach the wearers." I would suggest a megaphone or Morse signals. A posted copy of a London journal called "Airways," addressed "The Xews Editor, Auckland Free Press, Auckland, Australia," was delivered at this office a few days ago. It was natural that the Post Office officials should think c>l the "Star" when they saw "Free Press," but 1 thank them for the compliment. The main point is "Auckland, Australia." Despite Imperial Conferences and leagues of talk about hands across the sea, education moves but slowly in some quarters. 'The trouble is that hands go across the sea, but not heads. Tho deer wheel has come full circle. I notice that the Canterbury Acclimatisation Society has asked the Government to proceed against landowners who are not destroying deer on their properties In other words, the deer is now on the level of the rabbit. From being an ornament, and an attraction to the tourist, it has become a nuisance. It is, however, pretty rough on the farmer that he should have to pay for the mistakes of a few sportsmen. Aβ I was looking at a large pig at the Show on Thursday, a woman came out and prodded the animal vigorously with her umbrella. Perhaps she thought it was so fat that it would not feel the jabs. It struck mc, however, as being a j little thoughtless. I am told prodding the animal 3 was a popular pastime with young visitors. Animals have enough to put up with in being confined in pens for days and stared at by thousands, without being jabbed by umbrellas and sticks. However, perhaps there is another world where they will get some of their oSn back. Is the word "doctor," applied to the profession that is best entitled to it, to disappear? Legally there is no such person. "My name is ; I am a duly qualified and registered medical practitioner," so runs the formula at inquests, and society appears to be adopting the cumbrous title. Every day I come across it- A witness in a court case ] last week is reported to have said that I certain workers, in accordance witli the law, were examined by "a medical practitioner-" The context showed quite clearly that it was not a doctor of music, or philosophy, or dentistry, or literature, that looked over the*e men. so why was not the good old-fashioned word "doctor' , used? It is another example of the love of present day mankind for saying in two or more words what can be said better in one. "An apple a. day keeps the medical practitioner away.' . We shall soon come to this. To the charge that girls are not so nice, and modest, etc.. as they were, the answer might be that they never were. The modern girl has a champion in Mrs. C. S. Peel, an Englishwoman, who has just written a book on social and domestic changes:—"Waltzes and quadrilles at first wore considered very shocking, for then, as now, what was new was improper. . . . Tho waltz, tho tango, the foxtrot—all in turn have been accused of undermining the morals of society. No one has very much faith in society's morals, it would seem, for in the- sixties, when coffee was first served after luncheon, there was a great to-do. It was feared that young men would stay on after luncheon drinking coffee with their fascinating hostesses, and then ! Today a curate might drink coffee with a chorus girl and no one. would concern himself about it, while well-brought-up young women go to the theatre, with young men, and sup and dance at the fashionable hotels with little or no chaperonage . . . The young girl of the day has always been 'faster' than the. young girl of her mother's day, and has been assisted in her fastness by the "'blood.' the 'swell.' the 'Johnnie. , the 'masher' and the 'knut'—slang terms fur tinyoung men of the moment." Quite so. I hear an old-fashioned person say, "hut when is this 'fastness' gointr to stop? Shouldn't there be a speed limit? THE DIVORCE CHAMPIONSHIP. On Tuesday, at the Supreme Court, forty divorce decrees were issued in a three hours' sitting of the Court. "Plenso your Jtoiusr, scan the lisl - Cupiil tlio apologist Trays ynur lexal mind t" ripht Krrors of bis arrows' flight. J'nrry couples lately weil. With a single life instead; With this justifying plea - l Incompatibility. Tick the names the crier lias - Movies, milliners, and jazz, ; Each a predisposing cause For this usage of the laws. , * 1 "Temperaments which disagree !Seek this honoured Court's decree; I He may like a drop of lizz, She is saving for a 'Liz'; 1C he goes out 'with the hoys,' ' And she loves domestic joys, Ynu can h't your brusli nml onmb. i They will smash tho happy lionio; IF the husband's £<it a job Where they count up every hob. And the wife is fond of cards, Taxis, furs, and boulevards, Credit must disintegrate. And they'd better separate; If he wants to back a horse. And ebe don't—right-o ! —divorce; If he's pot an appetite, And will have his menu right. But she cannot cook a spud— Matrimony is a dud." "So your Honor, break the bond Where the mates don't correspond; I've some affidavits here That will make each action clear. Shall I swear the witness? What? ' I'ou will fix it on the spot! 'Rush them through ' Five minutes each r Legalises every breach ! There's no need to sift the facts In these broken marriage pacts; And although 'the law's delays' May apply to other days, We will prore lte speedy conree In the matter ol diyorca," II ■- v " ■"■••■■ -: **&&*.