GLIMERICKS.

Auckland Star, Volume LVII, Issue 144, 19 June 1926, Page 22

GLIMERICKS.

s Still they come; the making of glimericks is losing none of its popularity, and this week's total was well up to the average in volume. A fair number sent in solutions to last week's glimerick; that is not what is asked for. The solution is fairly easy, and the competition is for new verselets in the form we give below. This week's prize winner is Mr. F B Blackwell, of Paparoa, his verse being: A fair milkmaid of . . (r'y station np North) Despite all the men's efforts to (prevent) Left her cows, cream and . (fatty food) Went to town for a . . (hoUday) Got a cook's job and sooo copped a . (guardian of the peace)* Last week's winner read:— A cyclist who lives at New Lynn Went down by the sea for a spin. She rode near the water, But when the tide caught her She fell off the bike and fell in.

"Got a hacking cough and a headache? Well, I've a little wood you could hack, and it might cure your headache."' 'Much obliged, mum; but my 'eadache ain't of the splittin' variety." "Yes, sir, I always go to church when you preaches." "I am glad to hear that, but why when I preach—why not every Sunday!" "I'm always sure of getting a good seat when you preaches, sir." Little Mollie (to grandpa): And can you remember Queen Victoria? Grandpa: Yes, dear. You see, lam a lot older than you are. Molly: How much older must I grow before I can remember her? Patricia: How far can your ancestry be traced?" Baronet: Well, when my great-grand-father founded our fortunes they traced him as far as Shanghai, but he got away, after all." "Tommy," said his stingy uncle, "how would you feel if I were to give you a penny ?" "I think," replied Tommy, "that I would feel a little faint at first, but I'd try and get over it." "Did you have your voice trained for grand opera?" 'Yes." "And what did the voice specialist recommend?" "A movie career." "Does yoh take this woman foh y° n lawf'lly wedded wife?" inquired the Negro parson. The little man looked at the enormous woman who stood threateningly at his side. "Ah takes nuthin'," he answered dully. "Ah's bein' tooked." A maid employed by a well-known actress approached her mistress one_ day and said: "I've laet my instinct, miss! "But," said ths actress, aghast, "you must be mistaken. You can't have lost your instinct." "Oh, yes. I have, miss," repeated the girl tearfully. -'I can't smell anything at all." "I like your uncle," exclaimed «**« girl to her chum. "He is such a sporty old man!" , "Yes, but he's a little too sporty »* times," remarked her friend. "For instance, the other Sunday he fell asleep in church, and when I 'nudged him M yawned, stared at the hymn-board, and cried out so loudly that everybody must ( have heard him,""Good gracious, only j three starters!"