RANDOM SHOTS

Auckland Star, Volume XLVI, Issue 229, 25 September 1915, Page 17

RANDOM SHOTS

ARydinK ll**

Some write a nelKM>°">r's name to lash. .Some write— vain thoußht— for needful rash, Some write tn please tbe country clash And raise n din: For mc. iid aim 1 ncrer fash, I write fur fun. Certain Anglirans in Canada have earned the undying gratitude, of generations of nritons by the way in which they have dispose.! of the question: "Is the'seroml verse of the National Anthem a fitting one to be sung in wartime!" With a joyful and unanimous heave that must have disconcerted the blithering ones who wished to make the verse "tapu" for the duration a! the war, a conclave of Canadian Churchmen has decided that the verne should be sung— an.l clinched the business by lustily singing it. "Bravo," say I; also "Encore!" What are the sentiments to which Borne mollycoddles took exception? They arc: — •'("■onfnnnn tbelr politic*. Prostrate their knavish Irlrks!" Now, if ever Uiere was a time when these ■wards should be mine "with energy and unction, it is precisely in this year of grace, 1015; ami the fact that Britain is at -war is an additional reason why we should pray that politics may be counfounded and knavish tricks frustrated. T can quite -well understand that the verse may derplease the great fiulitical Panjandrums of .St. Stephen's, or of Ottawa, or of Wellington, and that it may jar on the sensitive, nerves of some party newspapers of the baser sort whose "knavish tricks' have been euch as to bring down on them tlie warm indignation of -true patriots; but (though. Ii must confess that I have never heard i that verse sung—ha anybody?) I. fewone. should like to hear It bawled out, with proper emphasis, on every suitable i public occasion. The party truce in Eng- | land, which people were led to.believe was a piece of patriotic abnegation by the politicians, proves to lfave been an : insincere compromise, rorced upon the Government party far unworthy party purpose*. It is an armed truce, and the old hostility is kept alive in various way*. The evil that, has resulted from j injudicious attempts to score a party advantage » equivalent to a serious reverse in the field of battle. It is well for the Empire that Ihexe Is a central figure around which the loyal millions can father, and. while crying "Confound their politics." can add the fervent shout, "God Save the King:" There i 3 hardly room for two opinions ai to the justice of compelling every citizen who is of fit age and constitution, i to render war service. The citizen, of course, should not require compelling; but he does, just as he requires the spur of compulsion to make him pay his taxes. The analogy between tax-paying and military nervier is very aptly shown by Mr. Quiller Couch, in his new novel. "Nicky-Nan. Reservist." He tells how a ! recruiting sergeant from London makes! a descent on a Cornish village, and. as ! the result of his strenuous efforts, bags ■ only two recruit*. The reason for the ■hyness of the villagers is explained by I Frank Halls, who say*: — We doant think noocht. Zur. o , them nilvrrtal»i-mrnt« .in , noospaper talk about I eon , Mililcrrlir When <;uv mmi ncr»l.< ! •i>lil«-pr» n.-Ulj wire. Cut nient II say »<> 1 • Irnr etlovish. like It ilr>*-. when It iranti I luxe- "i-om* Inns. Frank llnIK you're, trnnlHtl " An' when (iiir'mpot taps I Frank llnl- on ulinulcer anti «. i this. 11l I m rlelit rnoiish. hut I'll do; Mir foot till litiv mill! .Ioe«; nor 11 any man .j sense this xlilp Ki'-ler This argument cuts. doubic-edged ; fashion, into our system of raising war relief funds and hospital ship equipment by voluntary offering and appeals for subscriptions. There are monetary, shirkers as well a.i workshop slackers ■ : and "white feather" evaders of military ! service. If compulsion in one case, whvj I not in all! lam told ITinre are not! I a few very -wealthy people in Auckland . district whose name* have not yet apI peared in any war fund list. It will be ■ necessary for "Guv'rapnt , to tap them on the shoulders one of these days. The war tax should be framed so as to hit them bard. I Whether or not a host of angels > fought against the German* during the' ' historic retreat from Mons i« a question , of fact that will probably never be j authoritatively answered; but the story 1 is one that proves how inextinguishable j in the soul of mankind is the belief in I Supernatural intervention at supreme j , crises of human fate. Did not "the | stars in their courses figt.t against j in a battle of very ancient date? I And has not Maeaulay told us how — The fo«ls that live for ever g Have fougrtit for Home to-<lay! The-si- tie the (treat Twin Brethren To whom to Dorians pray. Bavk comes tbe chief In triumph, Who. ki the hour of Birhl. ■nnb seen the Great Twin Brethren In harness on his right. No theory of poetic license of language will account for these things. There are unseen Powers that fight for men —the "great Allies" referred to by Wordsworth, to whom may be added the Spirits of Liberty, Patriotism, Courage and Devotion—and why should not these take bodily form to the vision of men whose high purpose has raised them on ! to a piano where those qualities may ! assume tangible shape? "Where there is no vision, the people perish." When our young men see visions of angels, it is surely a good omen. 4±i4±4*±±4 Perhaps £he most remarkable thing about the psychology of war is the intensification of the feeling of nationalism that results. In times of peace we criticise our country and countrymen; but "when the blast of war blows in our ears" we all become as blind to the de fects of our own people as we are to the virtues of the enemy. About eighteen months ago, Lord .Ashbourne. addressing a Gaelic league meeting in Ireland, described Englishmen us having thin, prominent lip-*, long front teeth, and the general appearance of a a .-lv rabbit. The German language, lie naid. was J i*trong and vigorous; the EngHsh language in a state of weakness, rottenness, and decay. John Hull's future, to use a bull, was behind him. He was insular, and nothing would bring him in touch with the outside world. The noble lord's utterances were then wildly applauded. To-day, if he were to say those things anywhere in Ireland, he would probably be tarred and feathered; if he said them in England or any of the Dominions, he would be sent six month* to prison, "without tim eptioa."

We are fighting the Turks, yet the Turks are eager to figh-t for üb! To understand this paradox, it is necessary to explain that the Turks' Islands are a small group in the Bahamas, forming a dependency of Jamaica. The seat of local Government is at the town of Grand Turk, on the islaDd of Grand Turk. At a recent meeting the Grand Turks unanimously decided to send a detachment of troops to form part of the Jamaica contingent that is proceeding, to Europe to join the British ranks. The French have many Turcos fighting against the Germans and Turks. What with Old Turks, Young Turks and Grand Turks, it looks as though things "were getting pretty mixed.

I had something to say last week on tl»c subject of asses, including that of Ilalaam the prophet and a certain Turkish ass that lost his ears in the Gallipoli fighting. Since then I have learned something about English assey [ do not mean two-legged ones, but genuine quad rupeds. There was once, I am informed, a shrew old fellow at Margate, who kept a lot of donkeys and made a little pile by judiciously lending them for ladies to ride during the day and hiring them to brandy smugglers at night. His advertisement read as follows: — Asses here to be let, for all purposes right. To bear ongels by day and spirits by night. As regards Balaam's accomplished donkey, it is a favourite gibe of emptyheaded sceptics to inquire how it is p»s sible for an ass to talk like a man. The best reply to such unbelievers is that of an honest old Yankee, who said "I don't see why it ain't as easy for an ass to talk like a man as it is for a man to talk like an ass." Like most people, I have never heard an ass talk like a man; hut the other thing—"how often, oh, how often!"

A correspondent writes stating that he has .been reading "Through the Commotrwealth," by Mr Wm. Redmond, M.P.. and a more one-eyed book he never road— it makes out fruit the Iris-h have done everything for Australia. By way of showing that a member of Parliament is not infalli-ble in Ins facts, my corre spondent quotes the following sentence from the book: — ... "A irtlver sixpence nod a piece of lead In a pencil are simplelooking things enough: but. In order tn get some Idea of how lead and silver are produced, a visit to flroken Hill Is necessary." Of course lead pencils are not filled with the kind of lead that is found at Broken Hill, but with graphite. It is a sad blunder for a politician; -but a poor enough bull for an Irishman. It has, by the way. been remarked that Emerald Islanders have by no means a. monopoly of the bull business. It was an English lawyer. Mr. FMward Bullem (surely a typical .lohn Bulll who once declared, when addressing the Court of Appeal: "Trie defendant denies that he » the father of the said twins, pr either ol them!"

My brief allusion last week to Mr. Albert San ford's views on. the worthless* ness of gold has brought a long letter from that gentleman, which I regret I cannot publish. The pertinent point obout it is that Mr Sanford, so far from being in exultant mood, say* he feels "much doprewsed'' at the thought that he has wasted ink for the past twenty years trying to impress "a sceptical 10.-aj, population, very slow to comprehend simple tnitha." He appears, however, to find a grain of consolation in the facts that he, some time ago. wrote to leading American newspapers, stating his views, and that now "American bankers and others evidently see what 1 vainly tried to make clear to local Intellects-." On the merits of the gold question "Zamiel" has nothing to say; this column is not the place to discuss "the dismal science." Heaven knowa, the jokes are dismal enough in these w-ir times, and there is no call to descend to solemn scientific dissertations on the gold standard or porpoise's teeth.