RANDOM SHOTS

Auckland Star, Volume XXIII, Issue 300, 17 December 1892, Page 2 (Supplement)

RANDOM SHOTS

BY ZAMIEL

Inm« S^' a neighbour a name to lash Some write-vain thought! for needful ™«h Borne write to pl easß the country clash ' ite Sn .e.a n aimlneveff na dsh ai sea diD '' I writs for fun.

We Aucklandera pride ourselves on our love for art, and on the progress we are making in the arts of music, painting, and Buchlike. In proof of which we poinb to our Choral and Orchestral Societies, our picture exhibitions, and bo on. We have had a local art exhibition during the last couple of weeks which has attracted a good deal of public attention, and it is said that by such means we are fostering a love of art in our citizens and our young people. But then co achieve such an end our exhibitions of pictures must be good, and the specimens of art placed on view Bhould be the very best and choicest of New Zealand productions obtainable. It certainly has not beßn so with the Auckland Academy of Art Exhibition in the Choral Hall, which closed this week. Some local paper said that the ' Academy is to be congratulated on the success of its exhibition.' It would ba more honest to tell the Society that if ib cannot rake together pictures more worthy cf hanging on the walls than a number of those which were thus displayed it might as well go into voluntary liquidation.

Of course there were some good pictures amongst the number—indeed several of them would be worthy of any arb collection—bub others wero so bad, so utterly crude, ill-drawn and ill-coloured, thab I wonder tho Society had not more discrimination than to hang them on the walls of the Choral Hall. Bub it will bo urged thab to have adopted a higher standard would have reduced the list so seriously as to prevent the holding of an exhibition ab all. Very well; ib wero better to discontinue the annual exhibitions than to wilfully court the merited gibes of arb connoisseurs. I wish some members of the Academy of Arts had been at my side the other day to listen to the comments made by the spectators. One water-colour creation in a gorgeous frame viras described as ' quite Japanese, you know ; tha river runs up hill, and the cows all walk on their sides." Another picture was of the 'wall paper1 pattern, though any sslf-respecbing householder would hesiiabe to pub ib on his walls. Another arbisb had cheerfully coloured everything in his picture either green or blue, trees peagreen, water and sky deep blue ; stone 3 blue, hills dark blue; in fact, he seemed to have adopted as his motto, ' when in doubb use blue.' Another ' artist' pinned his faith to red, and all his girls, sheep, trees, roads and half his skies were tinged a sanguinary red—probably to make the onlookers feel cheerful. The skies in several of the pictures were bhe most fearful and wonderful I have ever seen. There is nothing like them to be witnessed outside of the Choral Hall.

I daresay it has been rather a trying time for the artists, for, by the very act of hanging up their canvases to be looked at, they delivered themselves into the bands of the critic 3, and, of course, all the visitors to the Exhibition conBider themselves to be as much properly qualified critics as the exhibitors one and all know themselves to be true artists. As a rule, however, these critics have let the exhibitors down very easily, partly from conviction, partly from friendliness and pattly from laziness—for a much smaller amount of mental energy is consumed in giving unqualified praise than in commendingin judiciously qualified terms. Bub there have been a few who have set up for professional critics among the amiably disposed throng of visitors, and in those creatures, as is wellknown, the bowels of compassion are prominently conspicuous by their absence. Their rule is to give no quarter, bub to 'slay, and slay, and slay,' and they spare neither the beardless strips ling who, for the first time, exposes hi 3 feeble powers, in the field of art, nor the veteran who has a good record of pasb victories to sustain him. However few or minute may be the defects in a picture, the would-be professional critic can make it swallow up all the merits, and it has never been contended that the defects in the pictures in the Choral Hall were either scarce or microscopical. No use urging on his acceptance the apparently indisputable fact, that in order to fairly judge the exhibits of our local Academy of Arb we must be content to use a standard that would by no means satisfy the Royal Academy in London. He scornfully proteats, * Aut Caesar, ant nullus ' —supreme excellence or don't .paint ab all. Yet Ido not know that the artist is likely to have suffered so much from caustic criticism, which 13 rarely addressed to his ear—as from the language of indiscriminating enthusiasm — which generally ia. I can imagine no severer trial for a painter than to stand, listening with apparent gratitude, while his bosom friend—or worse still, that particular lady whom he adores as tha apex of womankind —rhapsodises over his pictures, misinterpreting it as a whole, and every individual object in ib from the swollen, muddy stream, which ho has apologetically to explain is nob meant for a carriage drive up the glen, to the great cloud bank of cumuli, which ha never has the courage to deny as a snow-clad range of distant mountains.

Though one has no personal knowledge of the various artists exhibiting this year, it is nob difficult; to make out their identity by observing the persons who most persistently hang about the neighbourhood of particular pictures. 1 suppose it must be in obedience to some inscrutablo law, something like that which compels a ghost to haunb the spot where his body ia laid, that the artist's body is generally hovering about the picture into which —let us hope—ho haa put his spirit, for I cannot think it is by choice that he stands drinking in the heterogeneous remarks of the unconscious spectators, which are generally more bicter than sweet to his sensitive ear. A3 shewing tho awful risks that the unconscious public and the conBciou3 artist both incur by this idiosyncrasy of tho latter'a, lot me relate a little incident,- told ire by a friend of mine. Though this friend can't paint, he knows all about art—or thinks lie does—bub he would not wilfully wound tho feeling of a fly. The other day lie had been strolling round the Choral Hall looking ac the pictures, and his mind had become so full of unspoken criticisms that he was glad to relieve himself of some of them to a friendly stranger with whom he got into conversation. Of one picture in particular he expressed his general disapproval, and the stranger, after a momentary hesitation. agreed with him. My friend thereupon proceeded to' particularise in terms of fclio moat scathing denunciation what he considered the bad points of the painting until be declares he had left not a pin's head of tbe canvas intact. The stranger's ready

acquiesence in all that he eaid gave my fXLS 8 hl. gv63b °pinion of h« artistic judgment. 'You must surely be well acquainted with the original of the scene, to be 8o keenly alive to the atrocious defects in the perapective and colouring of this wretched daub,' he cordially remarked at tho end. ■ Yes, you are quite right,' responded the stranger with a pleasant laugh, ' I spent a fortnight up there, studying the spot in all its different aspects before I painted that wretched daub !!! My friend believes that his face at that moment must have furnished to the courteous, long-suffering painter an excollent study of a human countenance where 'Horror and chill dismay bat the brows and held the tongue *** *** * A * Lord Glasgow I should imagine to be the most good-natured and long-suffering of men. How he bears up, smilingly as he does, under this plethora of small shows determined to bask in Vice-r<Bgal patronage or is a matter oi much wonder to me. Every little entertainment, from a braßS band performance to a bun woo-ry, seems to be considered, by its promoters, as worthy of Vice-regal patronage. How many, requests are made for this favour it would be difficult to say, but judging by t>he freedom with which Vice-regal patronage is extended, I should imagine His Excellency is inclined, like certain illustrious politicians, to pursue what has come to be known as the ' peace at any price' policy. The rival Scotch societies worked ttiemseWas into a perfect ferment in their struggle, for Viceregal favours. Now, this sort of thing is petty, it is not entertaining His Excellency, bub is making use of him for the purpose of aggrandisement, and I hope, when the Vice-resral party again visit Auckland they will be permitted to choose cheir own amusements. Except} for charitable purposes, His Excellency should nob be invited to any entertainment, unless it be of a thoroughly public character and worthy of the much prized patronage. Ib is absurd to say Lord Glasgow likes it, that he does not mind it, or that to be thus pestered forms part of the duty of a Governor. If we do nob treat our distinguished visitors better, I shall not be surprised to hear of their early departure for Wellington, Christchurch, or Dunedin, where some measure of peace may be obtainable.

Ardent admirers of the late poet laureate have been shocked by tho discovery that the deceased was fond of beer, and that his taste for wine was, from a connaisseitr's point of view, depraved. As to his liking for beer, a good story ia related by the Rev. J. M. Buckley, edibor of bhe ' Christian Advocabe.' This genbleman says thab many years ago when he was a hero-worshipper, he followed Tennyson, who was accompanied by a lady and two children, aboub the South Kensington Museum for two hours and a half, hoping thab he would speak. Ab lasb the poeb made signs as if aboub to do so, and, hoping to hear some criticism of a painting, Mr Buckley listened intently, and hoard the memorable words: ' You taJse care of the children while I go and get some beer.' The poetry was knocked out of bhab situation.

Those who go to and from* omnibuses and trains have splendid opportunities of observing the best and the worsb sides of their fellow travellers. Occasionally, a case of gross selfishness crops up, more frequently, I am glad to say, solf-denial and generosity in the matter of giving up a seat is noticed. The selfish peoplo are, as a rule, short distance passengers. Any 'bus, any tram, would suib them quite as well as the 'bus already pretty full, and bound for a distant suburb, into which they enter. They occupy ac much room as possible, and will nob budge an inch to allow anyone going the whole long journey to get a scab, or at least, a porbion of one. The obher day, a young girl was refused admission to an omnibus by a gentleman v/hose destination was scarcely more than three hundred yards further on. Had not the young lady's friends insisted on giving her standing-room, she would have had to loiter about the streets for another hour. Needless bo say, this selfish man had a comfortable teat. Quite as selfish are thobe passengers who fill up the seats with parcels and small children. Neither of these two commodities pays any fare, yet people giving full price for a scab have to stand, or submit bo scowls and unpleasanb remarks, übtered in sbage asides, if they insist upon clearing away the debris of children and luggage and sitting down. Christmas is coming, which means more travelling. Would ib nob be a good thing for all passengers to begin at once to culbivabe a Christmas spirib, and with right goodwill to consider other people when travelling ?

*** * # * Pressmen, like policemen and physicians, run up against some queer characters now and again in the pursuance or their nightly duties. At a fancy dress ball a few v/eeks ago, a friend of mine chanced to meet with an individual who proved to be quite a3 proficient in his special lino as the immortal Cherry-tree Washington is generally credited with having been in his. Like the ' Father of the People,' he could not tell a (single) lie. He was a wholesale manufacturer of the article, and could turn lies out in all manner of shapes, sizes, and colours, at a moment's notice. He was one of the large number of gentlemen in Auckland, who in some mysterious way are supposed to be connected with the press, and who generally attend all the local concerts, subscription dances, and entertainments on free tickets. To the aforesaid fancy dress ball the character under particular notice brought a young lady, giving in lieu of the chargeable sum the magic word. Later on in the evening he was asked what paper he represented. Now ib so happened that my friend, who was standing close by at the time, heard tho query. Imagine then his surprise when the supposed scribe gave in answer the name of the journal he himself was on. Irretrievable was the mistake and fruitless tho garbled story in explanation. The management of tho ball, getting wind of the state of affairs, came down upon the unhappy creature for tho price of two tickets. He had not even an orphan shilling in his pocket, and the young lady foal* ing* keenly tho position, offered payment instead, and immediately lofb the hall, refusing tho escort of the mock pressman who had brought nor,

In these advanced times when so much is said and written about the equality of woman with man it does seem strange that some enlightened legislator cannot sweep avray an absurd custom that is still enforced at our law courts. A woman gives evidence in an indictable charge, and bonds are prepared to answer her attendance in due course at the Supreme Court. She may be a strong-minded female in whose august presence her meek husband scarce dares to call his soul his own, bub none tho iess that woman cannot sign the bond. No; her husband may bo a drunken good-for-nothing, bub on such occasions ho stands forth in all tho nobility of manhood and signs tho bond. Or ho may be a hardworking man who bus to loso half-a-day's pay to attend the Court, but still ho must be there to sign for tho woman. Suroly it id time this state of things was remedied.

Our laws aro very fitraiißO on nomo points, much as wo prido onrmilvoH on British justice. No doubt many I'oudoi'M will remember how, f-hortly boforo l/wil Christmas, a hard working woman who wit'liod to make an honest penny took n lioonsod hail, charged one shilling admiHWon, and at the game time gave ouch viaitor v ticket, en-

titling him to a present. The gifts were by the way, manufactured by the proDtietrS and her daughters. Ib will also' pXbly be X^f^* Was «n-taSd into I!f h Of rthe Garnin X and Lotteries Act and the unfortunate woman had to apoear ? ?f\ ' Pay the nomiaal fine inflicted to vindicate the outraged justice of the land. The offence, of course, mus have been in not procuring a pe rmifci be . cause a Government that takes a perl Cir^h ef rr- al iCenSed Samb"ng machine like theitotalisator can hardly claim to be opposed to the spirit of gambling. The roason this case is referred to here is on account of the amount of mild gambling that is indulged in at bhristjuas trees, and bazaars, which are now so frequently held to aid the funds of churches and Sunday-Bchools. In some instances prizes made by the ladies or donated by the men are placed on large trees. Tickets are then sold to the visitors, who waib till their particular number is called out, and receive the present, good or bad as the chance may turn. One glance afc the flushed eager faces of the young people as they waib to ascertain their luck will serve to show how inborn is the love of gambling. vVhat puzzles me, however, is to find out wherein the offence of the woman who was fined, differs from the unpunished practice pursued by some religious bodies. Ministers may objecb to ' Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay,' and may pass resolutions calling upon the Governmenb to take step 3to check the gambling spirit of the age, but so long as church institutions first teach it to the children, there is no fear of bookmakers lacking pigeons later on. Apparently, people have ceased to understand the necessity for maintaining the church with regular contributions, and all sorts of subterfuges have bo be resorted to in order to wheedle the needful from the pockets of the devout worshippers. If the founder of our religion, the anniversary of whose birth is made the excuse for inaugurating these functions, could visit Auckland with the scourge that was once used in the temple, methinks ample employment for ib would be found close ab hand.

The time is not so very long ago when English Proteßtants would have counted ib nothing short of a sin to try to allure people to their churches or meeting-houses with anything but the pure milk of the Gospel. To offer gratification to the ear in the shape of instrumental music, or to the eye in floral decorations, would have seemed a proceeding thab savoured strongly of. bhe Scarleb Woman, and was bherefore nob bo be bhoughb of. Later on, instrumental music came to play a large part in our Protestant services, but ib was never set forth as one of the chief abbracbions to churchgoers. But the times are now changed. Our religious teachers have apparently waxed desperate. Since they cannot go out into the highways and compel men to come in, they put insinuating advertisements in the papera offering floral decorations, floral hymns, floral sermons, and beautiful music to tempt the wandering sheep into the fold. They would seem to have given up appealing to the religious senso in man, and directed their attention to the aesthetic. In this they have displayed the wisdom of tho serpenb, for ab the prosenb momenb the religious sense, with the large majoriby, is unforbunately dull and moribund, while the ajsbhebic instincts have been cultivated till they are paramount. The acbion of almosb every eecbion of the Christian Church in regard to church services shows thab the preachers have tacitly admitted this to themselves. The primary question nowadays is how can we make our church attractive. In the old worship the preacher callod aloud like the Psalmist: • Come let us sing praises to tho Lord,' and the people answered his call. Then the whole end of man was, indeed, as seb forth in the cabechism, ' bo glorify Uod and enjoy him for ever.' Now-a-days the call seems to havo degenerated into an uppoal to the people to come and be amused, or ab best, have their sympathies agreeably excited. Beautiful music, beautiful flowers, and eloquent discourse are the inducements offered by tho enterprising clergyman, just in tho same way as bhe pushing theatrical manager advertises new dresses, new scenery, new songs, and exquisite effects. The extent to which this ministering to tho ssnses may in bhe future bo carried, is hard to predict. In beginning, if the churches merely answered the demands of the people, and if they simply go on complying with these it will lead them farther than they ab presenb would care to imagine. To-day bhe cry is, ' the Church is in danger,' bub if things go on as they threaten, wo may yet live to hear ib changed to ' the theatre ia in danger,' from the counber attraction of pulpits filled by men consecrated to the ministry of sense.