RANDOM SHOTS.

Auckland Star, Volume XXI, Issue 217, 13 September 1890, Page 2 (Supplement)

RANDOM SHOTS.

ZAMIEiT

Some write, a neighbours name to lash, Some write—vain thought! for needful cash. Some write to please t'ae country clash, And raise a din. For me, aa aim I never fash— I write ,_or fun.

The greab strike is still the all-absorbing topic of conversation. It comes home t 0 us all very closely, and when people' B comforts and pockets are touched they are not inclined '.o talk aboub much else. In view of the large number of men who are temporarily oub of employment, ib is astonishing how regularly business proceeds. The first 'panic being over, now people settle down quietly to the contemplation and enjoyment of their strike an though thoy had lived wibh it all their Uvea. There appears now to be a woll-d'efined prospect of the questions in dispute being submitted to arbitration. Let us hope they will. I cannot profess to be an admirer of strikes myself, and I have never heard or read of one thai did nob bring a great deal of loss, and misery and suffering. Probably, ihe presenb one will be no exception to the rule, although people in the colonies are on the whole much better prepared for sudden emergencies of this kind that the labouring classes in the old country. I trust the day will soon come when all these social and even national questions will be mutually referred to arbitration, and we shall see no more of wars, strikes and other euch calamities.

The maritime strike and its attendant troubles has nob been without its humorous side, and disinterested spectators, as well as the unemployed lumpers, seamen and carters, have found plenty bo amuse them in tho amateur efforbs of bhe clerks and guileless ciby youths to lump cargo on tho wharves or drive a waggon. It was great fun, so they tell me, bo watch the erratic driving of a well-known business man when bis hands " struck." He drove his cart with a proudly conscious air of fulfilling a stern but imperative duty, and though he had several narrow escapes of landing his horse and vehicle over the side of the wharf, still he came out of the ordeal scatheless, and still lives to tell the tale of how he drove a cart in the days of the strike.

One or two amateur drivers came to grief, bub everybhing considered, bhey did well for amabeurs. One " gilded youth," .sent out from a warehouse much to his disgust to cart goods, was muchly relieved when'the news came that the strike was about over. He was seen a day or two ago wrestling in despair with a stubborn quadruped between the shafts in Wellesleysireet. He wanted to reach Queen-street, it appeared, bub the animal evidently had a rooted objection to going down the hill, so he plunged down on his haunches and grinned at his driver in a most exasperating manner. He saw thab he had an "amateur" to deal wibh. The unfortunate quill-driver was completely nonplussed, until some good Samaritan, in the shape of a small street arab, advised him bo " Turn the 'oss round and back 'im down the street." Tho driver acted on the suggestion with alacrity, and as the " 'oss " raised no objection, the procession reached the main thoroughfare in safety. The crowd sent up a mighty laugh, but bhab didn't trouble our gallanb carter.

A rather amusing contretemps occurred in .Ponsonby a few days ago, all through the ** strikes." It was funny enough looked at from the outside, bub to the principal parties concerned it was hardly a joke. A certain family were " movin'," as the son and heir put it, and engaged a carter to remove their household lares and penates to another house a mile or so away. John cheerfully took away the firsb load, containing the most important article of furniture and the rest. On his return he calmly informed the head of the household that he waß "called hout" and thab he was going to " cart no more for no one." So he calmly skedaddled, leaving the unfortunate family to shift as best they might. "We have no home," they mighb truly have sung, for in reality they bad none. They dragged on a miserable existence for four days, without any furniture to sneak of in the house, but if they had vacated the place for their new residence they would, perforce, have had to forego cooking utensils or food, so bhey chose the lesser of these two evils. Eventually they managed to secure the services of a " non-unionist," and once more they were enabled to eat and sleep in comfort. The lady of the house now occupies a goodly portion of her leisure in impressing on her neighbours the perils of " shifting " while a strike is on the boards.

The strike has had a good effect on ab leasb four men in Auckland. They are bachelors, and run a ranche in one of bhe euburbs. When bhe sbrike began they feared famine, and rushed the local grocer, laying in a big supply of flour and oatmeal, and potatoes and jam. Then prices began to rise. Bread and butcher's meat, and other things that were considered necessaries, became unreasonably high in price, and our friends, who are all saving men with the hope of marriage in their hearbs, decided bhab they oughb nob to be exbravagant. They, therefore, decided bo subsist on the vegetable food which bhey had in stock. A cookery book showed bhab they could have a greab variety of dishes with their small variety of materials. For a fortnight now they have been vegetarians, and they have come to like the diet. For a few days bhe craving for flesh was strong, but they resisted it manfully, and now tbe sight of blood does not cause them any cannibalistic feeling. Their health is good, and their pockets are fuller than ever, for they find that a vegetable diet is the cheapest possible. When meat gets cheaper they intend to have a little now and then ; bub it won't be on bhe bable morning.noon and night as in the old days. With the approach of summer their determination is to be applauded, for in such a warm climate as we have in Auckland, a diet mainly vegetable is best for you and best for me. . # # This mi*ning specufation is a worry and a source of bad language to men like me, ■who cannot afford to go gambling. A man is sitting sadly with his head in his hands, wondering how he can meeb that little bill that Smith and Co. hold, when in dashes Brown; " By, Jove, old man, you ought to buy Green Lobsters; they're rising hand over fist. They'll be a pound in less than a week." Then Brown proceeds to tell of having made £50 in one fell swoop over the Jumping Moses claim. Tbe listener smiles a watery smile, and conKratulates Brown. But envy and all uncharitableness fills his hearb, and he begins to cast doubts on the reliability of these mining companies. He says that most of the companies are sheer swindles, and that the promoters simply start them to catch the public in a fever time, and intend to drop out as soon as they can get any sorb of price for their Bharos. And if Brown is ab ail nervous, as many speculators are, the uncharibablo one haa tbe pleasure,

as the recital goes on, of seeing the light go oub of bhab Brown's eyes and the colour from hie cheek., till he sits down in a chair and meekly asks whab he had better do. Then does the evil-hearted one draw a picture of the day when tbe boom shall cease, and when Brown shall be tho accursed possessor of thousands of unsaleable scrip. And he concludes by advising Brown to sell out. The unhappy one rushes off to do so; and then his torturer rubs his hands gleefully and chirps to himself, " Serve him righb, for coming in here annoying me with his boastful tales."

A trial for murder is not a particularly pleasant subject for a "random shot." However, I have a word to say on the subject. I wenb up to the .Supreme Court the other day to see Black, the man who was tried for the alleged murder at Gisborne. It gave me quite a "turn" to Bee an ordinary looking labouring man standing in the dock, andtofeelatthesametimethatina fewdayshemigh tbe under sen tenceof death. There were a greab many persons present, and among bhem nob a few women. Most of them seemed to take a horrible pleasure in the proceedings. It never seemed to strike them with full force that on the result of all the talk and formality depended the life or death of a fellow creature. The only feeling thab appeared was one of curiosity. Surely there must be something wrong with a man's nature, and especially with a woman's, when tho issues of life and death to a human being are viewed with such callousness. Ido nob wanb to pose as a particularly admirable individual, but I could nob look on so coolly at a question of tho life or death of a poorblind puppy.

" Doctors differ and patients die" has often been stated, but just ab present doctors are differing whilst the patient lives. We are told that every man is more or less mad, and bhis week tho doctors were called upon to consider whether ib was more or less in tho case of the man Funcke, who was charged with the murder of Constable McLeod. I am told that tho empannelling of the special jury to settle this point was somewhat amusing. His Honor suddenly ordered the doors of the Courb to be closed, and then twelve good men and true were chosen from the audience right away, much to the disgust of those who had run into the Courb for a few minutes for " pleasure." It seems as if the proper jury would have been twelve medical men, and then we would have been able to see how much doctors could differ on such a vital question.

Tho prevalence of the habit of tobacco smoking is truly astonishing, and it is now fast becoming a question of who does nob, rabher than who does smoke. From the little barefooted urchin who demands butts at the Opera House door, up to the city banker at the club, the habit rules supreme, and on Saturday evenings the pavement underneabh verandahs appears bo be covered with the blue haze of tho noxious weed. Now, " Zamiel" feels a good deal of sympathy with those who object to swallowing other people's smoke, although he does not object to blow a cloud occasionally himself. Surely tho time ia not far distant when it will be necessary to legislate in the direction of compelling smokers to keep off the pavement, in order thabludies and non-smokers may not be annoyed by the consequences of the enjoyment of others who do indulge in this popular vice.

The extent to which smoking is practised was perhaps never more evident than lasb Saburday on bhe occasion of the labour demonstration. The number of men who smoked as they marched along was surprising, and when the assemblage congregated at the bottom of Mount Eden's nabural amphitheatre, the smoke of thousands of pipes arose like incense towards the heavens. " Zamiel *' has been told that one anti-smoking clergyman informed his flock next day that the cloud of tobacco smoke mighb be seen as ib ascended from bho crater of Mount Eden by persons standing in Ponsonby. Next, please !

Children are nothing if not imitative. Most of their games aro founded on the manners and customs of their elders. The strike has afforded a new one which certainly appeaas to be most exciting. " Zamiel" found some children playing ib near the Grey-street fir.ebell one fine afternoon this week. A handkerchief on a stick did duty for the inevitable and necessary banner, while a kerosene-bin made a famously noisy big drum. They must have been observant children, for bhey had bhe routine of the strike meeting very finely. They were so very orderly. A boy of nine was addressing the meeting. Of all the sanguinary young persons I ever meb he was the worst. Mere blood gave him no pleasure; he revelled in details. Ib was rather hard to find whab bhey were striking aboub, bub after all bhab was quite a secondary consideration.

A row of mosb disreputable-looking dolls were placed on a board againsb bhe fence and were frequently designabed blacklegs, wibh fearful and scathing contempb. A suggestion was made bhat one boy should be "oapbain of bhe blacklegs." * The urchin chosen for bhe disagreeable office objecbed in language more forcible bhan polite. A brief interlude followed, while the chief speaker and the unwilling candidate endeavoured bo convince each other by rolling each obber in the mud. The little maidens looking on relished tbe fight to an even greater extent than the boys, and they looked disappointed when, after considerable pummelling, the question was allowed to lapse. The battle had, however, whetted the orator's thirst for gore, and his propositions for the immediate dismemberment of the dollish blacklegs were so terrible that oho fond and timorous young mother of eight allowed her fears to overcome her political prejudice. Wibh a' sudden rush and a whisk of her tiny petticoats she eluded the guard, and seizing her own particular children, a rag doll and a much - battered wooden one, Bhe fled homeward amidst the derisive cheers and groans of the mulbibude. Ab a safe distance Bhe turned and gave the mob what is technically known as " a piece of her mind." For a girl of eight with baby eyes and golden curls ib was tolerably robust.