HOME MANNERS.

Auckland Star, Volume XVII, Issue 241, 13 October 1886, Page 4

HOME MANNERS.

Among brothers and sisters a little harmless banter is perfectly adtn'sjiblc, and.even perhaps desirable; but a family whoso members are alwayß snapping at each other in the style at present approved as clover both in fiction and in reality, can scarcely bo upheld as a model of courtesy at home. Both among brothers and sisters and husbands and wives, a great deal of talk which begins with chaff ends in rudenesß. In society conventional politeness sets certain limits to repartee, but at home there ore no such barriers. In private life, when tho more refined weapons of conversational dispute_fail, the combatants are are apt to resort to vulgar personal abuse. Servants'couldsometimes tell curious stories aboutthecourteay of theiremployers athome orrather, the wantof it. Thero are ladies re, nowned for their charming manners in society who use their maids as safety-valves for the innate rudeness wh:oh they contrive to repress and conceal in public. Doubtless tiey are hurt when, in dressing their heads, their maids drag the hair with the brush ; but that ia no excuse for pretty mouths permitting ugly words to escape from them. The master may be very fond of his horse ; but, aftor speaking to the animal in tones of the gentlest affection, it is scarcely the sign of a courteous gentleman to swear at the'groom because the stirrup leathers aro too short. Courtesy at home, like other virtue?, cannot be practised too constantly or be too well fortified by undeviating habit. Even when a man is alone, it is not well to throw aside too freely the restraints and observances of social usage. We do not hesitate to say that no one can, when alone, discard all customary forms and ceremonies in dress, mea Is, or the like, without incurring dancer or self-degradation. A man who neglects hia toilet when he is going to spend the evening in his own society is decidedly wanting in self-respect, and the bachelor who only makes nis rooms comfortable and attractive when he expects visitors must be [ pronounced unworthy of promotion to the ! moro dignified state of life to which all bachelors presumably aspire. '