The Honest Man.
His Wats Exposed and Charitably
Set Down as Eccentbicitv.
This man's deeds are of such a character, and have assumed such proportions, that further silence would be criminal; our duty to the public demands exposure. Of course our want of space forbids the attempt to pursue him in all his ways. It was but the other day that the clerk of our office detected him in paying his subscription in full, and "that without the spur of a dun. Our landlady next caught him in the act of selling pure milk without a drop of water or a grain of chalk. He looked, of course, a little confused, when his strange conduct was brought to light, but seemed sustained by a surprising self-possession. Not long after, when he came to look at our gas metre and reckon the number of feet we had consumed, he actually had the unblushing hardihood to set it down to an inch, without a hair's breadth excess. He saw our amazement, but coolly remarked, ' that was his way,' and went about his business. After he had left with his wood cart, we measured the cord, and found it did not lack a stick of full measure; so, when he dumped the coal saying there were ' ten barrels/ we measured it and found there was full measure. When we afterward confronted him with what he had done, he was so hardened in his ways that he did not show the slightest embarrassment. "What is society coming to ? What may we expect next? Our better-half went shopping, and he told her the prints would not ' fade,' and the handkerchiefs were 'all liaen,' and on reaching home and testing the articles she found them even so; and when she charged him with it, he did not even blush or explain.
Our watch was out of order; we are no mechanic ; all the little wheels, springs and cogs are mysteries to us; but when he put on his magnifier and examined, he said there was but little the matter, and that a dollar would be the utmost cost of repairs. We know our lace must have expressed a measure of our surprise; we could scarce refrain from expostulating against conduct so flagrant and unusual; but so does 'use breed a habit in a man,' that he took the whole thing most coolly, and as a matter of business.
His wife, too, has been infected by him. She came over to our house to borrow tea, sugar, coffee, butter, and the like, and to our surprise, and in violation of all experience brought them back promptly, and of a quality quite equal to those she had borrowed. He made us a coat not long ago, and made it as soon as he had promised to do, and when he wrapped it up he put in some valuable pieces, saying, they were ours and might be useful; we were utterly unable to explain such conduct, but not then knowing him as we have since found him out, we charitably set it down as an eccentricity. This man was unfortunate in business, and some of his creditors hastily forced him into bankruptcy ; but no matter; impelled by his habits, he went to work, economized and paid a hundred cents on the dollar and legal interest. Of course people talked about it, and said he was no ' business man,' that his head was not' level,' and the like, while many suspected he was actuated by some ' secret motive;' but hardened in his ways he heeded not. We rented him a house, and he had the cool audacity to send us a cheque for- the rent the first day of each month. When we looked in one day we found the man and his family actually using our house, fixtures and surroundings with as much care as if their own; but though he saw we knew it, he did not offer the slightest apology. We have given but a sample of this man's ways, but we have done our duty in unmasking and exposing him. The public is lorewarned ; let them be forearmed.
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Bibliographic details
Auckland Star, Volume VI, Issue 1823, 18 December 1875, Page 7 (Supplement)
Word Count
692The Honest Man. Auckland Star, Volume VI, Issue 1823, 18 December 1875, Page 7 (Supplement)
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