THE LIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE

Akaroa Mail and Banks Peninsula Advertiser, Volume LXIV, Issue 6578, 20 October 1939, Page 4

THE LIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE

-woissui :fe3padts&s<si jjaivityed to appear i in J television-S&ecided to "have the-shape: of first. So she called on a beauty surgeon. j t "How-muftfyTviJl you charge to alter the shape of my nose?" she asked. ,: M --hundred '"A hundred ~guineas V' she -exploded. "Isn't there *sojaethJng -lets -expensive?" aufgeoitiftauvely, tay*wsyfoing iwtova; iamp-, .Host." 5 V V ♦> r«f+ .V# : s 'Mrs "Browne had returned. from *as yisit to some friends, and was desthem to her husband. 'i "And what a sweet daughter they've got," she said. "She's,got her mother's •beautiful auburn hair." "Good -gjjacio.us! Those modern kids!" her husband exclaimed. "And what does the poor mother wear?" "I-want to.know if-you wilhbe my mU ?" "What's your : salary ? " 'IThree t.pounds a ,-week." "Three;poundf! Why that.wouldn't Jreep me in handkerchiefs.'' *iQh,vWry i>weli--:ril • wait, until your :COld's -better."

me un- - iess I give up playing golf.' > t i ' ;. Vf "Yesfl Shall iriiiss" her." ' «s a ' He vwas, /the dangers W of modern 'foods, arid with a dramatic gesture he pointed an emphatic finger at a rather "harassed-looking and inoffensive listener and demanded . "Wha is" it ?"We all eat'it some! time or other, yet. it's the worst thing in the world for us. What is it, I say? Do you'know?" ''It' appeared did a'Hkttfcky whisper : * Wedding cftkef" 55 >ji "Dear Mary,—Wotds... cannot pamt how much I regret having" broken oft our engagement.-I realise now that I need you-—more nthan ewef! : Will you;;pkase'Comedjack to me? Life witho.ut vy.ow fjit-r utteflyj hopeless. It is barren H »nd .has ruo Wherever. Lgo I want you by my side.. Your absence leaves a space which nobody else can fill. 1 So please -forgive me, darling and I come back!-I need you sojjiuch! I Your remorseful lover, J TED. j P.S.—JBy .the vway, congratulations on winning Tattersalls.