BULL RING, BULLS WOOL AND BRASS HATS

Observation Post, Volume 1, Issue 22, 16 October 1942, Page 3

BULL RING, BULLS WOOL AND BRASS HATS

(By Michael Hhnter.) (Continued.) Intensive training, from the view- ; point of an outsider, would make a very I interesting study, comprising as it does ' a multitude of queer activities. To | those who study its finer points, it is an i Art. It entails obth a psychological ‘ insight, and a thorough knowledge of ! the orthodox methods of brow-beating, bullying and blitzkreiging. The proper ! application and carrying out of these I qualities is left to those few artists, whose work ceases when the syllabus is compiled. The whole idea is to take the democratic soldier and by putting him through a course of intensive training, planned and executed, with a nice discrimination to render him so that he looses, his democratic leanings and his individualism, and becomes one of the cogs we.hear so much about, though it is often wondered what sort of a movement a few thousand of these cogs, all turning themselves and each other, will ultimately ■ produce. In the process of turning such a lot of little things can creep in. We get little cogs who think they should be a lot bigger, and in trying to expand, they also try to influence the movements of their brother' cogs, and produce a lot of unnecessary gratings. There are also the big cogs who should be a lot smaller, and they tend to show up the' already slow motion cog-glomeration. Now and then, they 'are smitten with conscience, and speed up the whole works for a while, usually in the wrong direction. The resultant gratings are like trying to change to low at sixty miles per hour without using the clutch We .could compare the whole thing with an egg, which has been sat upon for-the approved period, by a hen, conscientiously doing her part in boosting the vital statistics. Now, when this egg was due, it burst in the usual manner, but instead of producing a miniature fowl, merely prodeed a very bad smell. You can’t blame the hen, she was just living in hopes, neither can you blame the egg, its hopes w-ere short someone had blundered. Now a short description of some of the current sights during the intensive training period. The most common of these is very singular in the fact that it includes music, voice culture and P. T., although with the voice culture, volume seems to be striven at, rather then quality. The idea is this. A number of men are assembled in what is known as a squad, and for a few hours, they are put through a series of movements known as squad drill. The instructor stands back and says, “ Squadwillmovetotheright, Rightturn.” Thereupon very loudly and solemnly the squad chants, "One stop two,” and by a trick movement of the feet transfer their frontage to the right. As one man they are desperately clutching at the seams of their pants, either the said pants are falling to pieces or the squad is suffering from an infliction of crabs. It can be observed that this movement is accomplished in 2-4 time in the base clef. The next order is as follows: ‘ ‘ Bytheright, quickmarch.” "Down, Out, chorus the squad, and an ' array of right legs shoot out, the squad leans forward and'moves off. ■ As you can see music is left alone for this. movement, the down and out possibly signifies the complete subjection of the men to the instructor. There follows a series of movements carried out in common time, 3-4 time, or no time at all. x As time wears on, voices wear out, but still the class goes on, so we will leave them to their music and voice culture and have a look at another crowd, who tire, performing with rifles. They favour 3-4 time and all their movements are carried out ■to the good old waltz. The chief characteristic of their evolutions is the violence with which the first beat of the bar is enunciated, and a corresponding violtnce in the handling of the rifle. The rest of the ritual is much the same as (squad drill, except that the squad remains in a stationary position. From this we go to a charming game of make believe. On enquiry it is discovered that the detachment (same as squad only different) are practising mounting an imaginary gun tractor. ■After a preliminary portion of drill, which includes changing around, in a track which forms a very narrow parallelogram and numbering off in an ob-_ j scure ■ fashion the instructor yells' “Mount.”,' The ranks take a left and 'right . turn respectively .and doubling around to a ’point where the tractor would normally stand they pile in and take up their allotted seats. The man known as No. 1 runs around them to see if everything is shipshake and then hops in himself. Unfortunately they are not in the Tractor. According to the instructor they should all have black eyes or bleeding noses through trying to get through the doors which they did not open. The ' process is repeated. These games of imagination are known as "going through the motions” and are very amusing. until the novelty wears off. • Now and then, the "Old School Tie creeps in to the training, and it is with amazment we learn at a lecture on the Traditions of the Regiment, that Battery (censored by Security Officer), were a “Submarine Mining Corps” in the days of yore. 1066 and all that. Rah! Rah! All this foregoing suffering is noth-

ing to the shock the soldier gets when he proudly presents himself at an overseas camp and with swelling chest announces “I have been very intensively trained.” He is larconically informed to forget all that chocolate, soldier stuff as he is going to start some real training now. The same applies when he reaches Egypt, but by then he doesn’t care. He’s a real soldier then, and is not even surprised by the wildest phantasy the Brass Hats care to indulge in. The beauty of intensive training lies in the fact that after a few weeks it usually peters out. Well lets hope so, anyway. A recruit, who had-been complaining to the Quartermaster-Sergeant that his new battle-dress. didn’t fit anywhere, walked, unsatisfied, out of the stores into the arms of a Very Senior Officer without saluting. The officer pulled him up. "Look at my uniform,” he said. “Yes, I know,” replied the recruit, “mine’s pretty lousy, too!’