SOCIALIST SLAG

Rip It Up, Issue 179, 1 June 1992, Page 30

SOCIALIST SLA G

SING my COMRADE BROTHERS AND SISTERS! Join together and MARCH THROUGH THE WHEATFIELDS in the name of GREAT PEOPLES' LEADERS like MAO TSE TUNG, LENIN and BILLY BRAGG. LINK ARMS and stride in LARGE BADLY SEWN OVERALLS and SING SING SING our New Zealand workers' anthems, such as the one below by COMRADE SPUD: 'MOTORWAY' (Factory Hymn Version) "On the Motorway We all drive forwards

On to the factory In cars, mostly. "On the Motorway We ask why beloved Comrade Glenn Sings like a Comrade who has drunk a little too much, Oh Comrade Glenn You look spunky in your striped Notunlike Capitalist symbol Don Johnson." Yes as the winter hours draw in it is - COMRADE ELVIS who asks, why must we now conserve electrical power all of a sudden when Electricorp spent advertising billions last year telling us to USE MORE? Is this not a CONTRADICTION between the demands of WORKERS and the EXPLOITATIVE VERY VERY RICH BASTARDS who EMPLOY people?

In MOTHER RUSSIA our Slavic comrades do not have full access to MEDIA INFORMATION. For instance for a newspaper they have BIASED and ARCHAIC daily PRAVDA which for years was basis for INACCURACY, CRONIED OPINIONS and OBSELETE ATTITUDES. In Auckland however we have THE HERALD. The HERALD is very DIFFERENT from PRAVDA because PRAVDA does NOT employ BARRY SHAW. But it is with a WORKERS' TEAR in our EYE that we say GOODBYE to COMRADE JILL GRAHAM, reviewer of young peoples' musical recreation functions and church dances. For MANY MONTHS we have ENJOYED reading Comrade Jill's EXPRESSIVE and INFORMATIVE writing. As she departs into the GLORIOUS SUNSET, we will never forget such great quotes as:

6 MARCH: TheShamen, 'En-Tact'. — 'When you're in the mood, this would be a good one." SAMY; The Brand New Heavies. . — "An album all cool cats should own." 7 MARCH: Snapper, 'Shotgun Blossom'. —'The same Snapper distortion-saturated pop of old, which takes more than a cursory listen to split up from the solid mass of its first appearance into its crafted single power pop mini-epics." 1 MAY: MC PUT/Tim Finn, 'lslands'. i "How long's winter again?" 8 MAY: Curve, 'Doppelganger'. —'lt's all set to a dance beat, so it's not scary or especially eerie or anything."

Yes Comrade Jill, as all RIBIDUP typewriter jockeys know, writing after TWO LIVE CONCERTS and AS MANY BEERS in the same night is no easy thing, and so we say FAREWELL. And yes it is now time for HEAD LIKE A HOLE news. What a FUCKING SURPRISE, seeing as they are on the DWILLYSIDE record label which of course has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS MAGAZINE at ALL EVER in ANY FORM. I mean it's not like the EDITOR of this magazine has ANYTHING to do with DWILBYSIDE is it? RIGHT. Okay on with the made-up stories then... When the "OUT THERE' / "OVER THE TOP' I "ULTRA HEAVY" I "SLIGHTLY EVIL BUT ACTUALLY QUITE NICE WHEN YOU GET TO KNOW THEM" rockers from "WELLINGTON" visited Auckland for

"PRESS" they were booked to go out to "DINNER" with their record company. But the band DID NOT TURN UP. Why was this? Were they INCAPACITATED FROM TOO MUCH "BOOZE?" Well, probably. But HOW could this BE? For the EVIL band were only out drinking with the NICE GIRLIE SECRETARIES from Festival, weren't they? Surely such NICE GIRLIE EMPLOYEES could not DRINK A ROCK BAND UNDER THE TABLE? Surely they could not MAKE a rock band BE VERY VERY SICK BEFORE THE CURRY DINNER? Surely anyone employed by FESTIVAL RECORDS could not DRINK MORE than an entire EVIL ALTERNATIVE TATTOO BAND? Or could they—?

ELVIS SLAG