ELVIS SLAG'S HOLLYWOOD BABYLON!!

Rip It Up, Issue 171, 1 October 1991, Page 4

ELVIS SLAG'S HOLLYWOOD BABYLON!!

SHANE SILVER of POKE POKE rummages for loose change (hey, there must be MILLIONS up there). Behind are HARVEY from NINE LIVES and ANDY from noted heavy rock band RED ADAIR.

COOL POSES OF JAZZ no. 14: GREG JOHNSON. Here local pinup Greg introduces himself to two NEW girlies: "YOU'RE SHO BUDIFULI WANNA KISH YEW EUREUGURURGH." And who is the SUAVE RECIPIENT of Greg's STYLISH AFFECTIONS? FUCKED IF I KNOW.

COME ON BABY LIGHT MY FAG: the lovely Miss SHERYL MORRIS host of BFM's PAGAN MUSIC ALL SATURDAY show and also employee of Pagan Rekkids SUBMITS herself SHAMELESSLY to the POLISHED CHAT-UP METHODS of KEVIN "ULLO LUV WOTCHA DOIN'' the HAT downstairs at Cause A Celebre. HOT? Mate they were ON FIRE.

They're COOL. They're SUAVE. They're GARY and DENNIS and they're STUPID ENOUGH to do this for the CAMERA. GUYS WE LOVE YOU! If only our readers KNEW who you WERE, this would be NEWS.

Lovely married woman (sad buttrue) ROSANNA BROWN and lovely hairdresser friend VIONA. Here Viona takes a page out of GREG JOHNSON'S book and demonstrates the CHET BAKER look.

COOL POSES OF JAZZ n 0.13: GREG JOHNSON. Jazz MUSOS are typically NOTED for their COOL MANNER and STYLE. They are LAID BACK, FINGER-SNAPPING, CHET BAKER style DUDES. See for example the COOL MANNER of Mr GREG JOHNSON as he CURVES his LIPS into a SQUASHED DOUGHNUT SHAPE and makes the sound "EEUURURUUGH!" With Greg are RACHAEL FROM THE VIDEO (left), ANNABEL (right) and JAMES VON STROHEIM.

MEANWHILE back at the BAR are FABBO band THESE WELDING WIVES. Guitarist S! MIKE O'NEILL (left) is currently starring as JASON DONOVAN. Note COOL MANAGER on right Mr SIMON GRIGG, counting band to make sure they're all there...

OOH-ERR! That CRAZY GEORGE and his | r BARBIE DOLL are at it again! Hey there MC i OJ OTIS, hang on to your VALUABLES! SEXY FUN -THEY HAVE IT. ALL the TIME. It's the SEXUAL REVOLUTION and GEORGIO is the REBEL LEADER! Wbt a MASSIVE UPRISING, lotsa SLAP and TICKLE etc etc etc...

THE GLAMOUR WORLD of TELEVISION starring ROB "JUST A MINERAL WATER FOR ME THANKS" McLAUGHLIN and DIANA "JUST A GLASS FOR ME THANKS BUT CAN YOU PUT SOME PISS IN IT FIRST" of TVFM. After a HARD NIGHT on the box ROB and the lovely DIANA like to KICK BACK, LOOSEN UP and LEAN AGAINST A BIG CONCRETE PILLAR relaxing until some BASTARD PHOTOGRAPHER comes along and...

Remember: ALWAYS CARRY A SPARE. Noted dotheshorse MILES VAN URK demonstrates the SAFE method of travelling through a crowded bar. Next month: PUNCTURE REPAIR.

FANS OF TERMINATOR II CORNER: GERARD "CUT THAT HAIR OR I'LL BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF" from Chagall and RUSSELL "OOF I FEEL A BIT SQUIFFY" moments before they KICKED a HARLEY DAVIDSON to DEATH.

ALTERNATIVE CORNER: The lovely RACHEAL scores 8 out of 10 for CRED for once being in FLOYING NUN band the 3D's. On her right (and on her BACK) the lovely MARK AMERY of STUMP MUGUZINE gets into the NEW ROMANTIC look with SUAVE LOUNGE LIZARD attire and patent Morrissey-thickness neck. HEY, maybe he couldput ITEMS about FLOYING NONE bands in STOMP MOGOZINE?! Now THERE'S a THOUGHT.

BEAUTY TIPS WITH SHIREE HONEYLOVE: Well, it's important to start off with a good foundation. I myself prefer Max Factor n 0.5 highlighted with the Dior "Autumn Prat" line of blusher. Remember, never mix pink with green, and a nice crooked eyeliner always sets off your Nikes something lovely...

He's COOL, he's SEXY, his TEETH HANG OVER HIS LIP. He's RICK from LOPYGRAM, and he's coming for you...

MEANWHILE in the LITTLE BOYS' room MARK "SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE" RHYTHM SLAVE and SHIREE "FRIEND OF MIKE O'NIELL" HONEYLOVE struggletofind their FLY BUTTONS under all those floppy layers and hoods and trainers and generally DEF ACID GEAR. Mark is SO PISSED that his HAT is on BACKWARDS. What's more, so is his BASEBALL CAP.

ACHIEVEMENTS IN MODERN FEMINISM n 0.5: GEORGE "IWI'S BIG ADVENTURE" HUBBARD. George, noted for his RECORD PRODUCTION, here tries his HAN D at a DIFFERENT SORT of SINGLES GAME. George has CURATED many EXHIBITIONS and now here he MAKES ONE OF HIMSELF. Nice one Georgie boy, don't forget to SINK some PISS at the new COLIN McCAHON EXHIBITION MAAAAA-AAAATE!

A less urbane MARCUS LUSH.