SMILE RAISERS.

New Zealand Tablet, 13 April 1922, Page 46

SMILE RAISERS.

Two small boys were puzzling; their brains to invent a new game. At last one of them said, eagerly. “T know Billy; let see who can make the ugliest face.” “Gam! No fear!” was the reply. “Look what a start you’ve got!” 9 Johnnie (to new visitor):' “So you are my grandma, are you?” Grandmother: “Yes, Johnnie, I’m your grandma on your father’s side.” Johnnie: “Well, you’re on the wrong side; you’ll soon find out.” “Mummy,” said the little girl, “I bet you can’t guess what I’ve got under the table.” To humor her, her mother and father made various guesses. One or two visitors joined in. “All wrong,” she said. What is it, then?” asked her father. “A tummy ache,” she answered, e V Mrs. Homer (in need of a cook); “Have you a letter of recommendation from your last employer?” Applicant: “No, ma’am.” “Why did you leave your last place?” Because the husband and wife were always quarrelling.” Indeed! And what were they always quarrelling about ” “About the way their meals were cooked.” And so this is little Walter!” said the visitor. “Dear me, what a big boy you are now! I wouldn’t have believed it possible!” (‘A Mother,” said Walter, when the visitor had gone, °esn t it pass your comprehension how persons in whom one would naturally, expect an ordinary degree of intelligence appear to believe that the children of their acquaintance will always remain infants, and persist in -expressing surprise when they observe the perfectly natural increase in their stature?” A man who had obtained work in a railway yard was told off to mark some trucks. Here s a bit of chalk,” said the foreman. “Mark each of ’em eleven.” A little later the foreman came round again. There was a large “I” on the first truck. Nothing else had been done. “What, does this mean?” asked the foreman, “Only one truck —and I said eleven, not one.” * “I know,” said the man, “but I couldn’t think which side of the ‘l’ the other ‘ I ’ goes.”