WAIFS AND STRAYS.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume IX, Issue 3, 16 January 1892, Page 56

WAIFS AND STRAYS.

In the Year 5,000. — Professor Pumpkin: ‘Now, here we have a cast of a head as late as the end of the nineteenth century. Mark the low forehead, the heavy animal jaw and the miserable development of the ear.’ A paper mentions the case of a woman who is so large round the waist that her husband can’t hug her all at once, but when he takes one hug he makes a chalk mark, so as to know where to commence the next time, and thus goes round. .Changeable.—One of our young men when he married didn’t want to patronise the baker. He said bread tasted ever so much better made by her dear hands. This delighted her. But when she wanted a scuttle of coal, and he suggested that she get it, as the fire would feel so much better if the coal was brought by her dear hands, she was disgusted. Women are so changeable. ‘ Tobacco-smoking,’ said a traveller, ‘is so common in Holland that it is altogether impossible to distinguish one person from another in a room of smokers. ’ ‘ But supposing you want to speak to someone present, how are you to find him out!’ ‘ Ab, in such cases a waiter is sent round with a pair of bellows, with which he blows away the smoke from the face of every person until the right one is found.’ THE SWEET GIRL CYCLER. Light as the foam on the crest of the billow, Hurrying over the street. Spins a fair creature as lithe as the willow, So dainty and neat. Many an eye the fair vision will follow. Heads from the watching will reel. As she floats on her way with the grace of a swallow, The girl on the wheel. A famous musical curiosity has just been sold in Paris—the well-known wooden shoe, strung with violin strings, which was sent to Paganini as a present by an eccentric sabot maker from Normandy. Paganini was, history relates, much insulted on receiving this queer present, and was only pacified by an intimate friend, who induced him, after having a neck added, an upper table with sound holes, and some other alterations made, to play upon it, and the great violinist was at last persuaded to play one of his most brilliant concert pieces upon this unique violin. INGRATITUDE. Young Cupid lost his way And came to me to find it: He'd been a truant all the day. But didn't seem to mind it. I put him in a hansom, then, For home, and feed the cabby ; But my reward was what most men Would call extremely shabby. He got his bow and arrow out And pierced my heart, nor tarried. But drove away ere I could shout, ‘ Great heavens ! Cupe, I’m married.’ They All Like It.— ‘ America is woman’s country,’ naively writes a well-known American artist returned after twenty years life abroad. • Women run Boston. I attended a hundred, more or less, receptions to encounter women. I went to a matinee. The house was filled with women. The studios swarm with women. I gave an exhibition of my pictures. It was crowded—women. I sold a number of canvases, women bought them. Women are everywhere, and, strange to say, somehow I like it.’ What Was Needed to Make Her Happy.—A few days ago a prominent clergyman who is noted for his benevolence received a letter from a woman asking for £2OO. This was her plea : ‘ She had a friend,’ she said, ‘ who married about the same time as herself. They had married men of about the same social standing and could afford to have about the same things. Lately, however, the friend’s husband had been more prosperous than her own, and matters had now come to such a pass that her friend had been able to buy a new inlaid piano while,’ she wrote pathetically, ‘ I am obliged to wear life out with the old square piano my father gave me when I was married. Now, my dear doctor,’ she went on, ‘ you will at once see the sadness of this and send me a cheque for £2OO, which will be sufficient, I think, to get an upright a little better than hers. ’ Short-Lived Athletes. —A physiologist says :—Athletes are rarely long-lived. By athletes 1 mean the folks who are training themselves continually for special feats of muscular power, and I leave out the dilettante amateur who exercises slightly, comparatively speaking, and then with only the object of physical development. It is my opinion that, as a rule, the professional athlete is not a verygood risk for the life insurance people. And this aside from any risk of physical injury- of a sudden nature to which the athlete in the course of his performances may be subject. I think it would seriously stump you if I asked you to name a dozen cases of extreme longevity among men who have been famous for their muscular power and skill. But anybody can name a dozen people who have led sedentary lives from boyhood and attained extreme old age. Very strange as it may appear, consumption is a disease to which the swimmer, the oarsman, the runner, and the fighter have all on numerous occasions fallen victims. A Courageous Woman. —A young married woman in Glasgow recently effected the capture of a burglar in the following manner :—While she and her husband were asleep the parlour window was forced open by a man named John Lawrence. He went into a bedroom, and so noiseless were his movements that he succeeded in taking possession of a large quantity of jewellery. After accomplishing this part of his work, he approached the bed with the intention of rifling the pockets of the clothes which were lying by the bedside. While he was engaged doing so, the lady suddenlyawoke, and took in the situation at a glance. When she gave the alarm the burglar returned to the parlour, and escaped by springing over the window of that apartment. The husband, as soon as he became aware of what was going on, commenced to put on part of his clothes, but his wife who is a young active woman, about 25 years of age, without waiting to dress, at once started off m pursuit of the man barefooted. She followed him along Sandyford street and Derby-street, down to Dumbarton Road, and around to Kelvingrove-street. On endeavouring to take refuge in a close at 31, Kelvingrove street, he ran into the arms of I'olice-constable Charles M’Millan.