THE SEAMY SIDE

Waikato Times, Volume 106, Issue 17837, 9 October 1929, Page 14

THE SEAMY SIDE

TALES TOLD TO MAGISTRATE. MARRIAGE RUINS FRIENDSHIP. (By R. E. G’OHDER. in London Daily Mail.) Joseph and Moses were bosom friends for years. As David was to Jonathan so was Joseph to Moses. They married and they took rooms in the same tenement in Bethnal Green, E. In the old bachelor days they cut caps by day and capers toy night, and after they were married they settled down and found mellow friendship in sweet domesticity. But as so frequently happens, Mrs Joseph had a row with Mrs Moses, and the friendship of years was wrecked in a neighbourly squall. Moses- went into the witness-box at Old Street Police Court yesterday I with a bandaged head and a bleeding heart. He said that Joseph, the friend of his youth, accompanied toy four relatives had made an evening call. They came at eight o’clock, and at 8.30 he returned to consciousness lo find his wife asking him what was the matter with his face. Two hours later, said Moses, Joseph called with his relatives and hit him over the head with an iron bar. The next time Moses regained his senses he was in the hospital. Joseph, speaking eloquently from the dock and Ilie witness-box, declared he couhijjproduce witnesses to swear that lie was not present when Moses was beaten up, and Mr Clarke Hall, the magistrate, adjourned the case, to the disappointment of relatives of both parties who were crowding the public gallery. Old Kentucky, and the west of Ireland, to say nothing of Corsica, have a reputation for family feuds, but the sons and daughters of Israel have nothing to learn about family fights.

Mr Clarke Hall is the most patient magistrate in London. Complaining wives in Shoreditch, E., regard him as a father confessor to whom they relate their husbands’ sins. Any woman with a real grievance is sure of a sympathetic hearing from the Old Street magistrate, who understands horses and children. Yesterday, however, Mr Clarke Hall met his Waterloo. A plump, middleaged woman, whose 'complaints exceeded her vocabulary, beamed through her spectacles, and said: “Gentleman, please, I want to say, Isn’t it, that I have come because so it is, ain’t it?” “I beg your pairdon,” said the magistrate. "Gentleman, please, I am here because- he into my house does come because he is a son not of mine, isn’t it, please?" “What is she talking about?” demanded the usher. “Gentleman,” persisted the beaming applicant, “because of what it is I don’t think it should be for .he comes into house, which is not right, don’t it, please, 'because he my husband’s son is.' ’ “Your husband’s son has every right to come into your house if he has his father’s permission,” declared Mr Clarke Hall firmly. “Excuse me, gentleman, I laugh. It is funny. Thank you very much for nothing,” said the little woman scornfully as she left the court, to the court’s relief.