DR. JOHNSON.

Waikato Times, Volume IV, Issue 242, 27 November 1873, Page 2

DR. JOHNSON.

(COLB!JBN'3 NKW MoNlH£YsjGfl#jL£lN E ) Goldsmith's pood nature suffered him to we 11 nothing of the bear about Johnson but the skin ; but tne detail of tho paw* was wanting to perfect the portrait. Certainly, of theexistence oi the paws (JoUsimlh must havelbeen conscious; fur, with the exception of Bos well, he had bjseh more rudoly crushed in their embrace than ntiy of the friends of thedoctor. Smnuel, indeed, coinuidneel life with the intention of being dux wherever bo was. The bojr vu father of the man. The posture of superiority wU» tho only posture in winch lie felt at ease. At school his favorite pastime wa« to be drawn on the ire by a barefooted lad, who drew him along by a garter attached to his waist. Here is the monarch in miniature. Doubtless the bare feet of the boy augmented the sense of vassalage so necessary to tue spirit oi Johnson. In afteilifo ho was draun a'jout by another slave, (Ailed. Boswell. At college he directed his efforts to stir up the students against their discipline ; to the authorities he could not become superior, but he might hope, perhaps as a demagogue, to share their power. When he was five-and-twenty years old he did precisely what one could suppose Johnson, would do :he married a woman aj;ed fifty! He would hare, doubtless, palled this idle and wcious perversity in another man, and hare been mercilessly sarcastic over the mistake ol taking a widow when a maid might hare been had. Perhaps he hoped to obtain more authority over an old than ho could over a young woman. If this were his idea, he did not delay his execution. According to the fashion of tl'osc times, the bride and bridegroom set out on horseback fop the church ; but before they got there, Johnson thought it necessary to show his wife, as he nfterwards showed hit frends, that wherever he was he must be first. Let him tell Irs own story: — "Sir, she had read the old romances, and h id got into her head the fantastical iiotion that a woman o! spirit should use her luver like a dog. So, sir, at fin-trha told me that I rode too last, and she could not keep up wi h me, and when I rode u little slower she passed me, and complained that 1 lugged behind. I was not to be made the slave of caprice, and I resolved to begin as I meant, to end. 1 therefore pushed on briskly, until I was fairly ought of sight. The road lay between two hedges, so that I was sure she could not miss it. When she did I observed her in toars." His marriage, his nfleetion, his admiration for hit w ife were perfectly in accord with his character If we may believe Garrick, Mrs Porter was stout and old, with swelling bosoms such as Fielding loved to write of, and fat cheeks whose dimensions she exaggerated by a thick coating of psint. She had an undue partiality for strong waters. Her voice was loud ; her walk was a swagger - r she was gross in her tastes, affected in her behaviour, and flaring in her dreis. Either Johnson was too proud or too blind to see his mistake ; for he would talk of her beauty as Congreve talked of the charms of Mrs Bracegirdle ; bb contrived endearing appellations for her; he had tho highest respect for her judgment; and when she died, mourned her with a con- 1 stancy and vehemence of grief that throughout his long life j suffered no abatement. Though they often quarrelled, there ' is no doubt that they were not more unhappy together than most married people are. At all events they were well matched. To any other man but Johnson, her whims, her habits, her tastes, her person, the abundant peculiarities or mental inSrmities which are generated by old age, would have b.-en extremely distasteful ; but Johnson also had habitr and tastes which, if they were more original, werecertaiuly not less disagreeable than hers. At table he was singularly gross in his manners and offensive in his choice. There were periods probably when her appetite, might haredeserted her ; when, with face as yellow as her cheeks would allow it to become, she could only watch him with amazement and disgust. Ho would pour oyster sauce over plum pudding, and allow the melted butter to run from hit toast into his chocolate. His favorite dish was a veal pie sweetened with sugar, or stuffed with plums } but hardly less choice in his eyes was the red rind of a salb buttock of beef, or a leg of pork boiled until the flesh fell in rags from the bone. He did not eat ; he gorged. He could devour at a sitting asmuch as would nourish two whales. He would masticate his food with the energy and fervour with which he declaimed ; the veins would stand out upon his temples, and the perspiration pour from his forehead. Nor was his eating the most formidable of his habits. ll is gesticulation! were often so excessive and uncontrollable tlmt he would twitch the shoes off ladies' feet, sweep the salt boxes from the, table, or cause a general confusion by half tearing off the tablecloth. He threw open windows on the br«akfist December days, and would stand meditatively in the cold draught,, whilst those in the room crept for shelter bthind the screen, or into the fender for warmth. His behaviour in the streetswas equally surprising. As ho passed' along ho would knock loads off porters' buck, and walk on in happy unconsciousness of the mischief he had done ; nor would the sufferers as they surveyed the burly form rolling from them • in an< outline not unlike that of the back view of an elephant, dare to pursue him. His march seemed to be performed by thewagging of his head and the contortions of his body rather than by the movement of his feet. Crowds would collect toWflfCll ||]|». II O wouU tou«jh tho vtvot pooU a« lie pfH«P& with superstitious precision, and if he omitted one, he would retrace his steps that the queer ceremony might be morepunctually gone through. At intervals he was seized with cramp or convulsion, and would dance about the pavement to the consternation and merriment of the passengers.