TUAPEKA PARLIAMENTARY UNION.

Tuapeka Times, Volume XVIII, Issue 1166, 29 July 1885, Page 5

TUAPEKA PARLIAMENTARY UNION.

[By One of the Angels.] "It's an ill wind that blows nobody good luck." So I thought last night as I took my seat at 7.45. The gathering of clouds before the full burst of the tempest wa? the means of brightening up the House a good deal. It was easy to see that everybody was on the tip-toe of expectation. The Opposition were evidently in a dense fog as to the outcome of their rash step. I don't think it even entered their heads that the Government would stand up for themselves. Oh, dear no ! those brave men who hadn't the pluck to umain in their place and assail the Ministry, but must needs mix themselves up with the Independent members on the cross-benches, quite exp icted to see the Trepsury seats become vacant at the first charge from their gallant leader. They, however,' soon found out the mistake they had made. Mr Finlayson had only just started to read his metaphorical oration against the Griffin Ministry, when the Premier pointed out that his hon. friend was breaking the rules of the Union by reading instead of delivering his speech. That, to my mind, was the first sound of battle. I could see the fighting members of the Opposition straighten themselves up to look as big and burly as possible. It did not succeed though. I could see at once that the Premier and his followers meant to do or die. I was rather amussd at the way in which the leader of the Opposition sat down, after treating the House to his highly-polished and 1 well-arranged discourse, he smilingly informed the Speaker that he had much j pleasure in moving the "No-confidence" , motion. No doubt it was another way of saying, "It is the happiest moment of my life !" Who shall say what pleasant dreams rose before the hon. member's fancy as he saw the Ministry hurled from their, high pinnacle of glory to make way for the blazing splendours which are to shine forth from his own chosen few ! I did think the Premier was a little hard on Mr Hindmarsh. No doubt he w?3 quite right in trying to teach this young , aspirant after Parliamentary practice a few things in connection therewith ; still, I could not help sympathising with my unassuming young friend, and, if I can possibly get a word with his Premiership, I mean to ask him not to be quite so heavy upon junior members. I noticed a perceptible quiver pass over the countenances of the Opposition as the Premier rose and put his foot down with a martial clank. It was evident that "dignity" and all the other adornments of office were thrown to the wall, and that his only thought was to use shield, sword, and battle-axe with nv'gbi and main. There- was no trying to hide behind the hedge. He told the House that the Ministry were quite prepared to stand or fall by the vote. Then there was a dreadful pause. Nobody seemed inclined to speak ; in fact, it looked very much like the finish. The Speaker rose and began " The ques— — " but was stopped by Mr Crooke, who is always ready, like one of those braves he told us about a few nights since, to throw himself into the breach and defend his party. A glorious motto is his : "To do or perish." I hope the hon. member will not perish yet ; for it does me good to notice the merry twinkle and then proceeds to batter them with his heavy artillery of logic. It almost makes me long to be a main, just for ten minutes, so as to join in the fight. Mr Arbuckle followed, and said he would rather support men he knew something about than turn* them out for men he knew nothing of. Nob a bad hit, I thought, for those ambitious spirits who are aching to fill the chiefs seata in the House. The hon. member's reason why the Opposition had taken up their seats upon the crossbenches was too goc dto be forgotten. The only motive they could have, he thought, was to quietly slide . round" the House until they found their desired restingplajfe. Mr Allnutt, in his calm, steady ,waj£ next tried to make out a good case for the Opposition: The chief fault with wlgibh the Ministry was charged seemed td be that they had not brought down their policy bills, but wanted to do the most of the work by resolution. All the members of the Opposition complained that the Union was sinking to the level of a Debating Club, and by this they did not learn enough about, parliamentary, practiceI hope thevjw|U never move in 'that direc. tion again/ after alt the pains taken by the Premier last Wednesday to teach them a few things! "The Colonial Secretary (Mr Capes) followed Mr Aljnutt, and had a swinging time of it. " One of the Gods " tells us that it was when Mr Capes focussed the ladies' galleiy that he looked his best. We are proud, of being able to inspire young and untried speakers with Buch enthusiasm and pluck as displayed by Mr Capes., There was another lesson in Parliamentary, practice in store foe the Opposition. After, hitting out in grand style for the Government, Mr Capes resumed h'*s seat, leaving a hard nut for the Opposition to crack in the shape of the " Previous question." This was at once seebnded by Mr Woods. " One of the Gods' 1 informs us that this is a most complicated affair. But after the pains which the .Speaker took to explain the matter, I cannot thnk ,how anybody can call it complicated. I was able, thanks to my womanly intuition, to grasp the situation at once. It was just this : The Government did not wish the debate to go on for ever, so they moved the previous question, knowing full well that they had got the Opposition whichever way it was carried. If in the negative, then there would, be an end to the debate ; if in the affirmative, the vote must be taken at once. Now I could see at once that the Ministry wanted to bring latter, and so boat their op-

ponents in the division. And strictly apeak?ng they did this ; only the Opposition refused to own themselves beaten. It was put once by the Speaker and carried in the affirmative. Then the Opposition made out that they voted in ignorance. The Speaker spent another Cve minutes m explaining it. Then it was put aja'n, and again carried in the affirmative. Then I could see that the Speaker was going to have a hard time of it. The way in which hon. members rushed up to the chair gave me the impression that even our galleij was in danger, so I quietly slipped away home. v One of the Gods" accuses me of dropping eighteen dorble stitches, my back hair, and then of fainting away. Oh, the horrid man to talk like that ! But how he exposes his own ignorance on such matters. Let me tell him there are no such things as double stitches ; and if he would only keep his eyes open he would see we wear our hair on the top, not at the back at all. And as fur charging me with being hysterical — why, if I ever find out who he is, I'll convince him that I am not troubled in that dir ction by giving him a piece of my mind in a most matter-of-fact style.