BRIEF MENTION

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 59, 29 October 1881, Page 108

BRIEF MENTION

—Wanted, for All Saints' choir, some good altos. At present there is only one who can sins. — Bandmann is playing at the Opera House, Melbourne, to fair houses in " Narcisse." — If All Saints' choir were weeded of those -who can't sing, what a blessing it would be. — If report speaks true, a double wedding will shortly take place in Wellington-street. — Two Mangare Wesleyans want each other's gore. Usual cause — a woman. — New picture for Mr Bloomfield. J. A. Tole, as Adam, bidding farewell to Edon. — The Observer was the first journal in the colony to foresee the intended move on Parihaka. , — Daere's new house is the admiration of all Ponsonby. — A teacher at one of the ISTewton Sundayschools has joined the Christadelphians. — A storekeeper at Whangarei is selling tobacco cheap just now. Query : Did it come by the Argyle ? — Major Morrow's ardour to get to the front is said to be rapidly cooling down. — E. W. Burton is the " coming " chairman of St. James' Mutual ImproTement Association. It is fairly his turn now. — There is a crisis in the relations between the Board of Education and the City School Committee on the question of matting in schools. — Mr Theo. Cooper has been promised the Good Templar vote if he contests either City West or City North. — Surely the marriage license fee must hare been reduced. More people have been spliced during the last fortnight than in an ordinary month. — Mr 8., of Newton-road, contradicts the statement made by A. W. in our last issue regarding Miss Hognn. — Mrs Skeen, of Auckland, a Shetlander, boasts of having taught Mr Stout, late Attorney-General, his letters. — A religious and temperance shining light, of Onehunga, who robhcd a neighbour of his domestic peace, has caused a schism in the fold. — They thought there was a whiskey still at the Turkish Baths the other day, but it was only the perspiration from a new chum in the hot room. — The men belonging to the Auckland G-as Co. were very successful in drawing several prizes in Mr Abbott's sweep. —Miss Braddon is about to publish a penny edition of Sir Walter Scott's novels in an abridged form. — We learn from a recent census that there are just 34 Jews in Norway. Thirty-four old clothes shops are probably sufficient for the frugal Norwegians ! — Since the ball given by the Kaeo-Mania "bachelors, many of them have been seriously contemplating matrimony. — Mrs Lewis's juvenile " Tambour Major . proved an egregious failure, and was quickly withdrawn. Children's pieces are about played out in Victoria. — Poor O. M. C, waiting for a settlement of Ms claim on the Patatere Co., reminds us of Dickens' disappointed patent inventor haunting the Circumlocution Office. — What were the widow revivalist and married man doing in a private apartment in Hobsonstrcet, while the chimney was on fire ? Were they at their devotions ? — Before Mr Foster, of Te Awamutu, sends us any more impertinent post cards, he ought to buy a spelling book. It is a pity that his ignorance should be exposed to all the post-office clerks and letter-carriers. — Mr E. S., of the Auckland G-as Co., will shortly enter into the bonds of holy wedlock. It is said that this sudden termination of his bachelorhood is owing to his large winnings in Mr Abbott's sweep. — " Claude Duval " is the latest comic opera. It is by the author and composer of "Billee Taylor," and the music of it is said to be superior to that of the latter work. — There must have been a mean lot of fellows at the Engineer's Concert and Dance, or else why had :i charming widow to spend Is on hop beer and apples at the close of the dance. — A Kawakawa paterfamilias, whose daughter ■was described by the local paper in its account of a ball as " Our Sarah," went round flourishing a horsewhip, and breathing fire and fury. — The specimen cartes exhibited at a certain photographic studio in Auckland look as if years had elapsed since they had reached the period of the " sere and yellow leaf." — Ponsonby -road is again becoming a very fashionable lovers' walk on fine moonlight nights. It is astonishing what a number of encircled waists one sees during a stroll along that thoroughfare almost any evening. — The law for the prosecution of employers who keep females at work beyond the proper hours is practically a dead letter in Auckland at the present time, breaches of its provisions being of frequent occurrence. — A correspondent, signing herself "Fanny," thinks the secretary of the Newton Catholic Church would profit by a perusal of Chesterfield's letters especially those of them which give special attention to politeness. — Since Professor Fraser's visit to Mongonui the fair sex there all claim to have " better balanced heads " than their neighbours. A young man, evidently a sutf erer, writes to us stating that in his opinion it would be better if they came out in their true colours. — Dearest Eveline, who wrote so affectionately to her " sweetest own darling, Herbey," the other day, reproaching him for not keeping his appointment, and signing herself " Yours till death" can have her letter on application. — The steamer Taimu and a barge had a race down the harbour on Sunday, the latter winning easily, much to the disgust of the man of "blue cloth and brass buttons," and the great amusement of a small poodle on the barge. — Mr Stanley Bracher will find his name in print in a manner uncongenial to his taste if he sends in any more nonsensical items without paying postage. Fourpence for an inane piece of chaff is too dear altogether. — Youthful reminiscenses appear to be favourite subjects for lectures among the magnates of the French\Literary Society. Peltzer, Engel, and De L'Eau have now discoursed on this theme, and doubtless Villeval, Lenoir, and the others will duly follow. —-The Philharmonic Society's next concert will be given during the Christmas season. One pnrt will consist of sacred, and the other of secular selections. Edwards intends singing the "Cnjus Aniinani," from Eossini'3 " Stabat Mater," while Miss Gribble will give " Com c Bello," from " Lucrezia Borgia." — There was a curious rehearsal between two youthful amateurs near the corner of a main thoroughfare the other day. The mole character was observed lovingly embracing the young lady. There was a fair attendance of the public, and the entertainment being free they appeared to enjoy it accordingly. — The establishment of a cricket club is mooted in connection with St. James's Mutual Improvement Association, for the purpose of promoting healthy exercise amongst the savants of that learned body during the approaching six months' recess. W. J. Napier is the projector of the scheme. — Conclusion of a feminine dispute which took place "over the garden wall" at Newton the other morning: " Your husband may be a good man, but mine is a better." "So I believe; a most notorious better !" [Debate re husband adjourned until the two ladies had settled the more pressing question of their own respective scratching powers.]

— Mr Ex -btim- bailiff Collins is back from Hawke's Bay, and has already made two or three disagreeable remarks about the Observer. Ex-bummy had better take care or we may present posterity with his expressive features, and not in a very agreeable form. — The probability of the elopement of a leading member of one of our dissenting churches, with a lady who has taken a prominent part in many religious movements in Auckland, has been freely discussed during the past week. Both parties are married, nnd the age of the lady is considerably in excess of that of her admirer. — A correspondent informs us that we were in error in stating the St. Andrew's Mutual Improvement Association carried a resolution against the existence of societv journals, but that the result of the debate was actually to the contrary. We do not see, however, that the existence of the society papers was seriously imperilled either way. —The latest news is that Mr Bob Tudehope has appointed Miss L. R., of Union-street, to the leadership of the U. M. F. Church choir, Pitt-street, vice Miss D. resigned. It is to be hoped the newly-appointed one will meet with success in her new sphere, and that her melodious voice will be the means of doing much good to the sinners who attend the above church. — There need be no further dubiety as to the return fare to Devonport being reduced to sixpence, the advertisements having now been quite explicit on the subject. It somehow harmonises with the doctrine of the eternal fitness of things for the Company's secretary to be called Tanner, which being interpreted signifieth 6d. —The following shows the correctness to -which the bank clerks of the present day are trained:— Scene Bank. Enter a generous citizen G. Citizen: " Why, mon, don" you tak' my deposit ? Bank Teller: "Because it's wrong." G. C: "Wha wrong ?" B. T.: " The slip says paid in by the ?iancl-s of , and you know very well that yon have only one hand." — A correspondent, signing himself T. H. D. writes to us to ask what alterations have been made in Carey's troupe to justify the raising of the prices. He says the company played to the usual rates of admittance down Soush, and should do so here unless they wish business to fall off. We certainly think T. H. D. is right and that the charge will prove a shortsighted policy. At Is and 2s 6<3 the pit and stalls hold money, whereas on Wednesday they were only three parts full. — "A Member" writes: — "Please allow me to inform you that the St. Andrew's M.I. Association is by no means in a comatose state ; in fact it is in a very lively and vigorous condition, of which the last meeting is a sufficient proof. A very fair audience turned out to listen to the treatment of a subject usually considered unutterably dull and uninviting, viz., Scotch nmtaphysics. Your insertion of this note will correct a wrong impression." — A correspondent sends us the following description of dresses worn by ladies at Mongonui on the occasion of a recent ball .-—Miss Trimel, cream oatmeal cloth buttoned behind, rink hat ; Miss Whitehead, black dress, white polonaise, poke hat; Miss Kelly, I black grenadine slashed with scarlet, hat to match ; Miss Larnley, brown cashmere trimmed with grey plush, hat to match. — There is a certain gentleman of the " hie, hfflc, hoc" persuasion in this city who draws a considerable screw for training certain young persons, and preparing them for examinations. But although the examination time is very nigh at hand " Hie " squanders the brief and valuable space at his disposal for the preparation of these pupils by repeating to them nonsensical nigger ditties, etc. This ought not to be, and we hope the present hint may stop the nuisance. — Howe's this ? We know that " one man in his time plays maay parts," but that does not explain why so many Johnny Howes are having morning interviews with the R.M. Two Johnnies in one week, and neither of them connected with the Theatre Royal, is apt to prove a lcetle too much for our forbearance, and makes us ask— How this Howeness ? [The compositor who set tip the above item , as the result of his endeavour to solve the query propounded, has become a Howe-ling maniac] — " Puck" wires from Dunedin : — Pollard's " Les Cloches cle Corneville" continues to draw well, but the management intend taking it off, substituting "Pinafore." If their agent cannot arrange dates for Christchurch, the company proceed to Hobart Town. Dunning went to Melbourne to-day to endeavour to secure the copyright for New Zealand of " Tambour Major," " Billy Taylor" and " Patience." Hydes and Love's organised company is travelling in the northern district. — Barber Shortt (two t's, if you please) thought he was hoaxing the youth from Fiji properly when he informed him with much solemnity that he (Francis J. Shortt) never went out in Auckland "because society was so mixed I" It would, however, scarcely have soothed the worthy Figaro's x>ride could he have heurd the shouts of laughter amidst which the Fijian related the story at the Star Hotel. Poor Shortt, he pines for gilded halls as he rubs in the pomade, and dreams of beauteous nymphs in Lotus land ns he rakes with a jagged-edged razor the chins of the sons of toil. — To the Editor : Sir, — With reference to Mr J. M. Sibbin's letter in your last issue, I herewith beg to emphatically deny the statement contained therein, and further, I challenge him to stake £20 (if he has it) against a like sum, and prove his statement if he can, the winnings to be given to local charities. — I am, &c, J. D. Phillips. [Here is a chance for the Auckland Dramatic Society. If only they can prove their original statement i.e., that they suffered annoyance through Mr J. D. Phillips' action, the local charities will benefit to the extent of £20.— Ed. Obs.] — History repeats itself, but owners of historic names don't repeat the characteristics of their originals. For instance, we learned some time ago that " Mo jes " was in the old clothes line, while " John Bunyan " was travelling for a firm of brewers ; and we once knew a man called ".Martin Luther," who was boss of an oyster saloon, and a " MrsHemans " who kept a greengrocery, with mangle accompaniment. In like manner we find that in Auckland the immortal "W. Shakespeare" is now a sowing machine vendor, while " Cromwell " keeps a pastry cook's shop ! Does the reader not feel inclined to cry, " 0 si sic omnia !" — The Auckland Society of Arts has issued its programme for an exhibition of paintings, drawings, and sketches in black and white, _to_ be held in the Museum on the 10th prox. The exhibition will be open to the public, without charge, between the hours of one and five, and a conversazione and social re-union of members and their friends will be held in the evening. The exhibition will be open to all without restriction as to membership, nnd will include pictures or drawings composed in monochrome, ink, crayon, pencil, chalk, sepia, neutral tints, etc., but the preference will be given to originals. Lists of works intended for exhibition must be forwarded to the Secretary, Mr Josiah Martin, not later than the sth prox, and pictures, etc. will be received at the museum between twelve and five o'clock on the Bfch. — The meeting of "French Residents," convened for the purpose of taking steps to secure the appointment of a "French" French Consul, was attended by half-a-dozen individuals, viz., three sons of Gaul, two Belgians, and a German. No agreement could be come to in consequence of the evident desire of each to secure the appointment for himself, and eventually the meeting was adjourned. While the merits of the various persons for the coveted office were being canvassed, and when it was being made manifest that no concord of opinion could be hoped for, a jovial bacchanal, in search of a tavern, entered the room. One individual, whose pretensions had been contemptuously underrated, immediately suggested that this intruder was the only candidate in view of the jealousy existing among the Gauls. It was not acted on, however. — Conversation overheard on Parnell Rise the other morning between a clergyman and an acquaintance whom he met on horseback .—Clergyman : "Is this a new horse?" Acquaintance: "No; the old one." Clergyman : "He seems to be getting spotted ; he's 'changing his spots,' like the leopard !" They part, with a mutual laugh at the brilliant witticism (?) A friend who accompanied the clergyman did not, however, join in the laugh, but scratched his head until he had satisfied himself that the Scripture text is to the effect the leopard cannot change his spots. Then he decided to write to us and expose the ignorance of professed clergymen. Our correspondent must not be too hasty in his conclusions j perhaps when he gets the

Eevised Old Testament he will find that the leopard can change his spots— in the way, at anyrate, described by the 'Yankee showman, viz., "When he's tired of one 'spot* he can go to another!" Meantime, until the Revised Version is in the hands of the people in the vulgar tongue, we would caution ministers not to make quotations from it in the public streets. — " Whither is the English language drifting?" is, or ought to be, a serious question for our daily press. It would make Lindley Murray's hair stand on an end to read a number of the sentences in the Star's "Early Sketches of New Zealand ;" and Noah Webster would be equally shocked at some of the liberties taken with the meaning of words. We suspect ifc is more of an orthographic muddle than a dietetic mystery, when we read about pigs being "gorged and fattened on the skeletons of whales ;" since we have a fixed impression that the skeleton is the bare anatomy of an animal, and it would rather puzzle the ordinary pig to swallow a whale's backbone ! In a like manner, when we read in the report of a tea-meeting that " Mr So-and-so catered for the refreshments," we fear that the mystery is ' similarly explicable, as the plain reading is that the gentleman named " provided refreshments for the refreshments !" The Forge of Vulcan-(lane), in an " editorial " note last week, has an unusually brilliant flash of stupidity, thus : "If we could see even an \mintentional injustice committed, we should hasten toward our amends honorably!" When slips of this kind are corrected, they are usually ascribed to " a stupid printer's blunder ;" but there would be fewer blunders if the saddle was always put on the right horse. — Eureka ! At last we have founcl — not the recipe for making milk of a " superior quality," which we fancy we have known all along, but a milkman honest enough to own up with it. On the front page of the Herald, under the heading of " Pure Milk," is an announcement of milk from One-Tree-Hill estate, in the course of which it is stated :— " The pasture on this estate, together with an abundant supply of . pure water, means milk of a superior quality." (The small capitals are in the original.) The importance to the dairyman of "an abundant supply of pure water " has never been under-estimated ; and for the production of the ordinary qualities of milk, a chalk-cliff in the vicinity has always been considered handy. But this, we repeat, was only for ordinary milk ; and as there is no suspicion of nny cliifs more soluble than granite in the neighbourhood of One-Tree-Hill, tho public may rely that the produce of that dairy is the genuine article. It is not long since a London physician stated that, in order to made milk digestible, it was necessary to have it well diluted with water ; and conformable to this, we are not surprised to learn that the milk from One-Tree-Hill "may be given to invalids and children with every confidence." If our readers think we mean to make mirth of an innocent milkman, we can only hold up our hands and cry with Byron—" Oh, Mirth and Innocence, oh, milk and water "