MISCELLANEOUS.

Thames Star, Volume XXIII, Issue 6894, 29 May 1891, Page 1

MISCELLANEOUS.

Mr. Wiggins:' Do you play that fiddle by ear, Mose ?' ' No, sah sby hand. 1 Man is a great deal like the wind—he whistles when he is about to do devilment. A man with good sight ought to be able to read the print at a distance of eighteen inches. Most men will forsake a man when he is falling;, but a woman will cling while there's a bean left. It is fooliah for a man to enter into an argument with a wasp. The wasp always carries his point He who said 'All's fair in love or war is undoubtedly the man who got the best of it in both cases. Be true to all men, that they may rob thee of thy socks in life, and of thy good name when you're gone. Ethel (ambitious):' What would you do if you had a voice like mine ?• Maud(spitefullyi' I'd try to put up with it.' ' Well, your goose is cooked,' exclaimed Snodgrass, as he entered his parlor. 'Who has been roasting you this time, love V asked Mrs Snodgrass, anxiously. Briefless (a young lawyer) —* Well, I'll be hanged !' Old Practitioner—' I would not be surprised—that is, if you defend yourself.'

Gentlemen who smoke allege that it makes them calm and complacent. They tell us that the more they fume the less they fret. The most bashful girl ever heard of was the young lady who blushed when Bhe was asked if she had not been courting sleep. 'He was a fiend in human form. * ' That's natural. No one ever saw a fiend that wasu't.' One clergyman rebuked another for smoking. The culprit replied " that he used the weed in moderation. * What do you call moderation ?' enquired the other. ' Why sir,' said the offender, • one cigar at a time?' A little girl of seven exhibited much disquiet at hearing of a new exploring expedition. When asked why she should care about it, she said: 'If they discover any more countries, they will add to the geography I have to study. There are countries enough in it now.' A woman may forgive some of the more serious domestic crimes, but she can never forgive her husband for telling her that her hat is on straight when she knows aa well as he does that it isn't.