WHAT A COW !

Te Awamutu Courier, Volume 59, Issue 4222, 11 December 1939, Page 4

WHAT A COW !

BEING ONE OF PROFESSOR MOOMOO’S WEEKLY RADIO TALKS TO FARMERS.

Good evening, everybody. The subject of my talk this week is "The Cow."

A's you all know, the cow is a complicated and ingenious invention for turning grass and water into butter fat. Why anyone should want to produce butter fat at the present time I cannot say, but the fact remains that .large numbers of people do; consequently the cow is one of the most popular products.

There are different types of cows. Each manufacturer produces his own model, but the essential parts are the same in all designs.

All standard makers equip their cows with four legs, one at each corner of the cow. The object of this is to raise the cow’s body and head well off the ground, thus enabling her to get a wider view of the scenery. The extra height is also useful when chewing clothes off the clothes lines. The possession of legs also enables the cow to move about, etc. By equipping each cow with four legs instead of two the herd is able to make the cowyard twice as muddy. All models of cows are also fitted with a head and a tail. The purpose of the head is to allow the cow to say “Moo,’ ’thus enabling city children to identify her as a moo cow. The head is usually attached to the sharp end of the cow, and the tail to the blunt end. The tail is generally used as a fly whisk. Some of the more up to date type of cow, however, have discovered that when properly controlled it serves splendidly for another purpose—to flick dirt in the eyes of the farmer when milking. Like all sports this requires practice to become perfect; but when once a true aim has been acquired, milking time becomes a real pleasure. The most important part of the cow, however, is the receptacle in which the milk is prepared and stored. This is called the udder. By a very clever arrangement this is divided into four compartments, each with a separate tap. By this means the milk is divided at its source, so that one part goes to the landlord, one to the mortgagee, one to the Government and one to the farmer. Sometimes one of the compartments will be defective. In such cases the farmer is omitted.

The cow is a very simple animal. Her principal pleasure is in getting in front of motor cars. For this reason many kind hearted farmers turn their herds on to the roads at dusk on Sunday evening, as the city motor traffic is returning homewards, so that as many of their cows as possible may join in this simple pastime. In recent years there has been a very commandable movement to improve the general standard of cows in New Zealand. The method adopted is simple, but effective. Once a year everg farmer selects all the worst of his cows, and sells them to other farmers. These cows are called “culls,” except when you do this yourself, in which case they are known as "specially selected pedigree stock.” The cow's husband is called a bull. Like the commercial traveller, he sel-

dom sees his wife, but the result is just the same. Ther are two classes o£ cows—those who pay and those that don’t. There are a lot of cows who don’t pay in New Zealand. Good-night.