The Right Side to Lie Upon.

Te Aroha News, Volume VI, Issue 302, 26 September 1888, Page 3

The Right Side to Lie Upon.

A coRRESfONDEXT wishes to know which is the right side to lie upon. This is a question that lias often troubled our own minds. In a general way, however, we may lay it down as an indisputable fact that the proper side is the right side. This implies that the side one does not lie upon is the left— that is, the side not touched. Some person* tell us that if we lie on the left side as a rule, it is injurious from a physiological point of view : the heart is liable to become one-sided, though whether this means that it would become all inside or all outside, we are not told. Perhaps it means that the heart would get too near the liver or some other organ. But if we lie on the right pide always it becomes monotonous. To be on the safe side, therefore, it scums to us better to lie on the back. Ah ! but we had forgotten. This is the position in which there is a race between us and the nightmare, and in which we get most of the start, although we never get beyond that pomt — unless we wake, and then the mare has got in before us. Plensant sensation, this. Well, then, it really seems as if we have only one side left on which to lie, and that is +A\q front side ; but this is a contradiction in terms : the fiont isn't a side at all. However, supposing it is a siie, and that we lie on it, then the trouble is that we interfere with our breathing apparatus, and it is not very pleasant to be trying to breathe through the pillows. Really, the further we pursue the subject the more insignificant do we find our reasoning powers to be. Nature must have meant us to lie on no side at all : we know a good many bad people, however, who are so clever that they can lie even while standing up, but they generally do this behind other people's backs, for if they were to lie before people they might soon lie on their own backs or in the gutter. We doit think Nature intended us to lie standing up, anyway. Of course, where a person is inclined to pub on too much " side," he should be advised to lie on that side so as to repress it ; sometimes other people repress it for you. The same advice may be e^ven to those who put on too much " front "' or who are in the habit of getting their " backs " up. However, the question is becoming prolonged and involved, like lawyers' briefs ; so we must leave it until our powers have been refreshed. In the meantime, we would ask our coi'respondent not to lie at all until he hears from us again ; he may, however, go on " laying up " against a rainy day. Possibly the lawyers could inform him of the best way to lie, but they usually advise their clients to lie in Court, and we presume our correspondent wishes to lie at home. Bub we really must shake off this problem, or we shall soon lie in the Asylum.