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“Man, whit a job it wis !. Hech, sirs, it wis awfu' ! It wis bash—dash —bang —shove —pu’, an’ ye didn’t ken ■whither ye wis on yer heid or yer heels—aye, at the railway station, I mean. Everybody’s goin’ tae Christchurch. I lost ma seat in the train, though. Janet had fixed up a’ things fine. Aye, she’s a real gem o’ a wummin is Janet. Aye, she’s English though, but some English fair beats a lot o’, us anes for guid gumption. Oh, aye ! Weel, I wis fair set in the train, when who comes up along the plaitform wi’ a leather sort o’ carpet bag, wi’ a soft can, quite towrist like, but Wullie Wulks. I fair jumpit up an’ oot. ‘Sit doon,' says Janet. No me. I aifter him an’ stopped him: Says I : ‘Mr Wulks, I’ll thank ye tae pay me for thae twa hens I sell’t ye.’ ‘Get away,’ says he. 'No me,’ says I. ‘Folks that hae money tae gang tae the Exhibeetion wi’ leather carpet bags an’ the like should pay IP'st o’ a’ for the hens they bocht. Aye, an’ them layin’ eggs a’ the time, an’ me stannin’ ooot ma money ! ’ Imphm ! but he wadna pay ! So it sort o’ put me in a thrawn temper tae stairt oot in. Janet, she lauehed. Oh, bit wimmin’s ‘kittle tattle,’ —’deed aye. It wis Janet that ,wis aye naggin’ aboot Wullie no payin’- for thae hens Eh ? the Exhibeesion ? Oh, aye, it’s no bad ! no bad ! It- has nae beginnin’ an’ nae endin’. It looks as if it wad be a great help tae the shows ootside. It jist pits me in min’ o’ Paisley Fair. Janet wandered up an’ doon inside, t-raiked here an’ there. Syne she flops doon on a seat an’ says : ‘ Oh, for a cup o’ tea.’ Says I : ‘Come tae the tearooms, then. Says she : ‘ Oh, Sandy, I canna abide thae teas aifter ■‘Hondai Lanka.’ It’s ill daein’ wi’ less than the best when your accustomed wi’ the best.’ Ye see, -Janet’s tremenjous pernickety ; she wis awfu’ weel brocht up. Says she : ‘Sandy, I dinna see nae Hondai Lanka exhibit.’ -‘Hoots, no, wummin,’ says I, ‘an’ ye dinna see ony exheebit frae the Bank! o’ England or sic like. Na, na, there is some things dinna need ony exheebitin’ ; they’re faur by it. A guid sovereign will aye advertise the bank, an’ every cup o’ Cock o’ the North’ is a big advertisement for ‘Hondai Lanka’ tea/ Syne we cam’ oot an’ veesited Mrs McGlashin’s. tEh, wummin,’ says I, ‘l’ll gie ye a treat. Here’s a cup o’ the best tea I ever tasted. Jeames brocht it frae. Dunedin.’ ‘Oh,’ says Janet, whenever she tasted it. ‘it’s Hondai Lanka, isn’t it ?’ ‘ ’Deed is’t,’ says she. Then they talked for a halo hauf-oor aboot it. Janet says its no only the deleecious taste, but it gangs' nearly twice as faur as ony ither. Aye, it is graun value. Hand a wee ! I maun see Wullie aboot ma hens. He’s ane o’ thae folk that likes tae grow fat on the - unearned Imphm !”

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Bibliographic details

SANDY’S VEESIT TO THE EXHIBEETION., Southern Cross, Volume 15, Issue 3, 20 April 1907

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SANDY’S VEESIT TO THE EXHIBEETION. Southern Cross, Volume 15, Issue 3, 20 April 1907