SATIRICAL SPEECH.

Poverty Bay Herald, Volume XLI, Issue 13428, 9 July 1914, Page 8

SATIRICAL SPEECH.

7- SHAKESPEARIAN; CHARACTERS

(From Our Parliamentary Reporter J WELLINGTON, this day. .! An anyising analysis of the component ~ parts of the present Ogi>pai.tion m. ParTliament was made- m tfie ; !Efbus6 oi^Re- ■ •pTesentative* by the member for Dtuie-| ,din North yesterday ' afternoon. Ever last session, said Mr Thomson, \he of the Opposition, had been ;;going about the country, but they had -•not during all their wanderings presented > any tiling m thd way of constructive _ criticism. They had poured forth nothing but a stream of destructive criticism, not that it was of much effect indeed. In his opinion it was •'•very futile, and the only thing that. '"united them was the desire to oust the; present Government. Students of Indian history, he said, knew full well that, if to-day the Government were to Avithdaraw ■■■• from India, the different sections there would be sooii at each other's throats,' and so it was with the present Opposition. If the stable Government at present holding this country together were from any cause' to be withdrawn — which he believed to be altogether iinlikely — there ■ would m a very short time be chaos. The present Opposition.- was.- held together like a bundle of . -unholy alliance*- \'K° begin with there was the quasi-Liberal party, living upon 'its past, but following a leader who had traversed one of ■ the first principles of. Liberalism by introducing into ,this^ country "Ming, principle of hereditary titles. . Next they had the . moderate Labor Party, represented by the hon. member "ftxr .Wanganui, Mr •Veitch. He was prepared to support this quasi-Liberal party, that had aefcu- « aly attempted to throttle. labor by the introduction of the. second .ballot. •, In the third place the Opposition, had m its ranks the Social Deinibcra'ts, with a set of ideals incapable of fulfilment, and which, if fulfilled, would causegchaos. Fourthly, they had" the party of.^one. re-, presented "by* the-'meffliber'JfQ^ HuttjlJVtr Wilford, who croaked from his own tree - top, and did not seem to have . 'much hold of any of the others. The fifth jparty was represented by the member for Ohxistchuirch--North-vXMj.lsitt)., He did not. claim, to -represent^either 'Labor or Liberal, andi he called. himself an In- . dependent. He; was'STipposed-.tp- be the leader of. the Tempera'hee' party, but m regard to his language ;lie./ was, the most intemperate man m Vthat House. They found him. sitting, 1 in^the sqat.,of ; ..the scorner, yet collaborating ,'. with and assisting, that section* of .the. .party, that represented the publican.and the sinner. good could they expect Irom, an Opposition .made- r iig,.of:<, ■ such, waning elements? If ,I<hey <i ,wei!el-lpt loose tomorrow, within. Ytwdvsx<.^6nths there would be chaos. Not 0119 of these, parties •■- couid have, the power" "to rule the count ry . Thrde of jthem 4 We£e * out* against each other- Afryth]^iVm l \the • >?ra.jf > of government tlhot would (follow- froni tnis heterogeneous collectio^Wpuld. berthing erf shreds and i patches' that would --be .soon torn to pieces. '' ,'■ "I regret,'> added Mr^Thomii^^'that when I come back to this house ' next session % shall niiss m4tiy: of my op.--position friends. They '"Mil,' lam quite sure, be relegated to , the -shade, , and \y.ill haye time to cool themselves.?' , - ; ; Mr Thomson pniqee^ed^Htes^be: the present Opposition m: Shakespearian terms as follow,s:~ c '"> ■;' " ! - v < •-."#* •■'v. * '■'-'■■ - , "The Wit6hesJ&.udr<>n.' > ;H.H: Royal Comic Opera House, Parliament Buildings, Wellington. —:,■'- First witch (High iHoiiiK^Sir J. G. Ward : "Here's the blood of a bat. " •Chorus' (the Opposition)": "Oh, put m that — put m that." : t- >^»,< :•■,- ",cSecond witch .-(member; for Avon) : ■ •'•Here's lizards' brain;" ' Chorus : "Put m a 'gYain. 1 ' Head witch ; (member, lot ohridjidh.urch North): "Here's juice^of, toad; here's oil of adder whichswill make the charm grow madder."'-* ' .."' >'-!'.'i'i . Chorus': "Put m all these; put m all these. 'Twill raise. the st^uijh. ? „ Hecate, (member for 'Hittt) .- / -'- "Hold ! Here's three ounce*,, of ..a . 'red-tailed " wench." '•" ; Chorus: J'B.ound> '.around about, about; all- ill. Qome; in :•'. all; good, keep out." /'. ' ■■'— »--i. ■• "What good can we; expect," asked Mr Thomson, "out off .this, hell-broth if I may call it -so;?" . . ;,,,-. Mr Isitt: Mr Speaker; is, that. Parliamentary? ' . ' ' Mr Thomson : It's Shakesperian, anyhow. • . • : ,;';■ , , ; . The descriptibn of '^tlie , member for Dunedin North, was listened- to with in-tei-est and amusement, ■'• the : only intea--: „ ruption being one from 'Mr'Etosell,- who asked, "When did yem, get^your^head read last?'' ' ••' '■' V V &**■■■•■■■ ■ •>.